Women, what is the most sexist quality a man can have?

[RagingInMiami]

Most men have some sort of behavior that can be perceived as "sexist" by some women, those traits that are sometimes annoying yet lovable.

[SeattleGirl]

1. Not seeing me as an equal partner

People have different strengths, different things they are good at. I don't want a man who would look at the things he might be able to do better than me as a sign of weakness in me, nor do I want a man who would put down, belittle, or ignore my strengths. If you are with the right person, you can work together as partners.

[bettyellen]

2. heavy lifting is good, especially if it's me. also, my couch.

it's a talent i always truly appreciate.

[RagingInMiami]

3. You like a man who lifts your couch?

And I've seen you, I would not consider you "heavy lifting" material.

[bettyellen]

9. no, i'm not heavy, LOL. but some guys really can't ummm... well, let's say

i'm not talking about the over the threshold move, which i myself could handle, LOL. that's not the move i'm thinking about. :evilgrin:

[RagingInMiami]

11. Oh yeah!

[bettyellen]

19. so you understand now.

:P

[RagingInMiami]

20. I understood before

I just wanted to hear you say it. It's much sexier that way.

[bettyellen]

24. well now i feel soo dirty...

thank you.
:P

[RagingInMiami]

28. I just love it ...

when you talk dirty to me. Keep it coming.

[bettyellen]

32. ha! it's not the sense of humour, brains, heart thing, that gets ya?

i knew that thread was a bit of a suck up. so many brainy, good hearted people here,
we gals all said to ourselves, "hey, they're describing me, i could get over like a fat rat!"
:blush:

[RagingInMiami]

35. For me it was sense of humor, brains and style

As well as general attractiveness.

So let's see, BE, one, check; two, check; three, check; four, double-check.

[bettyellen]

41. so you take style over heart? lol. well then you appreciate how when i

shoved the fella out the car down thread, i did throw $100 at him. that's me, classy and heartless. LOL
irish girls don't handle flattery well though, we are too cynical. and it's a whole different style of courting. you have to be a bit assimilated to deal with compliments graciously. i'm working on giving them more too.
i'm just saying. :P

[RagingInMiami]

46. I lived in Dublin for 18 months

Irish girls are very cynical. Lots of fun. Great humor. Beautiful eyes.

[bettyellen]

47. so you understand now.

LOL. when i was on nantucket, all the american boys chased the irish gals, and vice versa.
every american guy could see i looked irish and so they'd ask me, what's wrong with these girls, are they really that bitchy?
why can't they let me be nice to them? i'd say you could be nice, more or less, but to compliment a girl, well they'll probably take the piss out of you. we have to.
but you figured it all out the first weekend, i'm sure. i loved dublin. most of my time in ireland was belfast or the north and northwest though.
my cousin had an asian friend who grew up there, and when he'd talk w his belfast accent, it looked so fucking subtitled, you had to laugh.
great fun those guys, i had a great month in belfast. what did you do in dublin?

[RagingInMiami]

48. I was writing a novel

And waiting tables.

I was working on the Great American Novel. An expatriate living in Dublin having the time of his life.

Great people. I'm not Irish at all, but I really bonded with them. They made me an "honorary Irishman" because I could drink all night while spinning tales.

They liked me because I was the only American they met that didn't claim Irish roots. That was just over ten years ago. To this day, I still wear an Irish Celtic ring (not a claddagh) that was given to me by an Irish girl. It's a memory from Ireland. The girl was just a close friend.

Oh and the novel. It's still there, it just needs to be revised. It's Scarface meets the Catcher in the Rye, to sum it up for you. A Colombian coke dealer flees Miami to avoid being sentenced and falls in love with an Irish girl. He has a hit man come after him. And then there's a twist that I won't reveal here.

Ever since leaving Dublin, my life has been a tumultuous state of affairs, moving to several different states, going through different relationships, jobs, career changes, political obsessions, so I haven't been able to focus on the novel.

[bettyellen]

49. i did sound recording for a documentary in belfast, i fell in love with it

because it was really fierce and edgy, like where i grew up. those poor people, my god. the doc was about human right violations, and it was harrowing somedays. i'd be holding the boom mike up and just crying.
we got to meet bernadette devlin, and geri adams' brother Dom and his thuggy crew. all the catholic boys wore track suits, like Run DMC and they all had pics of MLK, more than JFK.

[RagingInMiami]

50. Cool

Did the doc ever come out? I would love to see it.

[bettyellen]

51. i doubt anyone has it as a rental, although you never know...

it was called "The Fourth Green Field" the director was Maggie Bruen, it came out about 10 years ago, maybe 9? We did some film festivals, AFI in LA and something in NY, a few other cities too. I remember those because I went to them.
The other part of my sound job was to signal that i couldn't understand what they were saying. Unfortunately this was always ghetto people, and their brougues are so different because they are so very segregated. And most of them are telling these awful stories, autopsies and strip searches were the easy stuff, plastic bullets between the eyes, and i'd have to ask them to start over because they were all sobby and impossible to understand. That really sucked, but it was an amazing thing to be a part of.
i had never seen such segregation, and the ignorance and hatred that it spawns is a just horror. i'm so glad things have chilled there.
omigod, i just saw the clock. i had better go now. :O
it was great talking to you! have a good one! :hug:
B

[RagingInMiami]

52. Yes, it's very late for us east coasters

I hope you didn't have to wake up too early. I'm also glad things have mellowed in Northern Ireland.

[aclog]

4. I think guys ONLY insist on paying

if its her money they're using :D

[MnFats]

5. Sexy? What's wrong with being sexy?

don't flame me please!
It's just a 'This is Spinal Tap' reference.

[Rambis]

60. there is a fine line between stupid and clever

I love that movie!

[RevCheesehead]

6. Insisting.

That's about as annoying as anything.

[Oeditpus Rex]

8. On what?

Okay, you don't have to wear the mouse costume. :eyes:

[RevCheesehead]

15. On anything.

I'm afraid of mouse parties... for obvious reasons. :scared:

[Oeditpus Rex]

21. Can't say I blame you

They are quite dangerous... especially the farmer's wife.

[RevCheesehead]

23. I saw the video.

I like to think I'm as open-minded as anyone.... but that just ain't right. :scared:

[LisaL]

7. What I can't stand is a control freak.

[bettyellen]

10. yes: "insists on telling you HOW to do something" would be #1, i think...

:hi: lizzy!
LOL

[Oeditpus Rex]

12. Damn!

I've been guilty of that.

:banghead:

[bettyellen]

17. And some guys keep it up, even when you tell them to stop.

i almost threw my friend's beau out of my car because he said i was riding my clutch- 3 times he said it. asshole.

[LisaL]

14. Stingy is second on my list. Counting every penny is not hot.

:hi:

[bettyellen]

18. bwaaah, i concur!

wtf is going on, lizzy?
:rofl:

[LisaL]

22. We could have been dating the same men?

:shrug: :rofl:

[bettyellen]

25. omigod, maybeee

well don't worry doll, you KNOW i double up on that BC, and am ALLL over STD prevention....
so i left him no worse off, at least physically. :rofl:

[LisaL]

27. How about crazy stalker types? One guy actually told me

he would love to drive his car over his ex-girlfreind.
:shrug:

[bettyellen]

29. one guy smashed his ex-wifes car

i was so relieved that she wasn't in it. at least, he said she wasn't in it.
and then it got worse, LOL.

[LisaL]

30. What about the guy who lies about his wonderful job and

tons of money he makes? Or a married man with a whole bunch of kids? Five or six, I think...
:shrug:

[bettyellen]

33. i know him too! and i have met worse....

i was actually trapped in a tropical jungle with the car smasher and that was the least of it.
i kept him too drunk to fuck for 36 hours and then pushed him into the gutter as soon as we got near civilzation.

[Common Sense Party]

31. Guys can't stand control freaks, either.

That's not a sexist trait. It's a character flaw that trancends gender.

[SeattleGirl]

43. Or someone who thinks they "own" you

And yes, I will concede that women can be just as guilty of that as men can. I dated a guy once who, when we were hanging out downtown, looped his finger into my beltloop. That just set my teeth on edge; I felt like I was being treated like a dog on a leash! :puke:

[Lydia Leftcoast]

13. Having rigid ideas about what "real men" and "real women" do

Acting as if he thinks his balls will drop off if he attends a performing arts event. Acting as if he thinks his balls will drop off if I know something that he doesn't.

[Skittles]

16. just innately thinks he's better because he's a man

all evidence to the contrary

[Digit]

26. A man who thinks he is more qualified to do ANYTHNG

...ot knows more about EVERYTHING just because he is a male.

What IS more attrative is a male who can admit when he doesn't have the answer or qualifications in every instance.

[TimeChaser]

34. I don't care about his porn

As long as I get my yaoi :)

I voted for the paying for meals, although I think often it's not consciously sexist, just how they were raised. Fortunatly, my boyfriend's accepted the fact that I'll treat him as often as he treats me.

[bettyellen]

36. what's a yaoi? sounds pretty good, gotta get me some of that!

[TimeChaser]

37. Yaoi

is a genre of Japanese animation and comics usually by women for women featuring relationships between attractive male characters. Also called Shounen-ai, which means Boy's Love.

[bettyellen]

42. i've seen that, they all look like a young david bowie or speed racer's

cute older brother and shit.
sweeeet!
:thumbsup:

[RagingInMiami]

44. Yowza!

[RagingInMiami]

45. Would you like some Yang with that Yaoi?

[RagingInMiami]

38. What is yaoi?

[TimeChaser]

40. Read #37

:evilgrin:

[UncleSepp]

39. All right, I'll throw in my $0.02 anyway

I'm qualified ;-)

For me, it was the compliments on ordinary things that always contained surprise. "Hey, that was pretty good shooting!" "Good job on wiring that outlet!" If those compliments weren't coming from a competitive marksman or an electrician, they came across to me as being a backhanded way of saying "Gee, that's pretty good for a girl" and simultaneously pointing out both how weird it was to do something that wasn't supposed to be done by a person with boobs and that any person with a penis is somehow magically qualified to judge the quality of the aforementioned activity. Not having yet found out where the penis goes into a shotgun or how to use one to do household wiring jobs, I'm not sure how gender is supposed to be relevant to either of them, or to building a computer, driving a car in hazardous conditions, or purchasing anything at either a Home Depot or a Radio Shack.

[Saphire]

53. a good sense of humor

[wildhorses]

54. damn I read the question WRONG

I thought it said, "what is the SEXIEST quality..." so I voted other...I am such a dumbass

[Nicholas D Wolfwood]

55. None of those sound sexist at all.

A sexist would possess those qualities but also believe a woman CAN'T cook, lift, or pay.

[Lilith Velkor]

56. Kindness is not sexist

Not trusting me because of something <some other woman I never even met> did is sexist.

[raccoon]

57. Being a know-it-all, having ALL the answers ALL the time,

telling me ways HE thinks I could "improve" myself, get a better job, etc.

Last time a guy I used to know tried that--hadn't had any contact with him for 25 years--I put him in his place.

[schmuls]

58. Thinks that all the housework gets magically done, but then

criticizes you if something is done "wrong".

[anarch]

59. what's wrong with being sexy?