OK. So you're a southerner in Hell. What do you do?

[wildhorses]

Gabriel came to the Lord and said "I have to talk to you.
We
have some Southerners up here who are causing problems. They're
swinging on
the pearly gates, my horn is missing, barbecue sauce is all over their
robes, their dogs are riding in the chariots, and they're wearing
baseball
caps and cowboy hats instead of their halos. They refuse to keep the
stairway to heaven clean. There are watermelon seeds and pig feet bones
all
over the place. Some of them are walking around with just one wing.

"The Lord said, "Southerners are southerners, Gabriel.
Heaven is
home to all my children. If you want to know about real problems, call
the
Devil."

The Devil answered the phone, "Hello? Hold on a minute."
The
Devil returned to the phone, "O.K., I'm back. What can I do for you?"
Gabriel replied, "I just want to know what kind of problems you're
having
down there." The Devil said, "Hold on again. I need to check on
something."
After about 5 minutes the Devil returned to the phone and said, "I'm
back.
Now what was the question?" Gabriel said, "What kind of problems are
you
having down there?" The Devil said, "Man, I don't believe this....Hold
on."
This time the Devil was gone 15 minutes. The Devil returned and said,
"I'm
sorry, Gabriel, I can't talk right now. Those Southerners have put out
the
fire and are trying to install air conditioning!!!!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. Oh this is funny, my dear wildhorses!

Allow me to kick it for you!

:kick:

[wildhorses]

3. thought you would like it...

thanks for the kick :hug:

[justabob]

2. That is hilarious... and soooo true nt

[wildhorses]

4. yeah....you would know...

being from Texas and all....I have family in Dallas BTW

:hi::pals:

[justabob]

5. yeah, you really can't live here without AC

I made it through one summer with no AC... I don't ever want to do that again. We had to leave the windows open all the time and the screens were crappy so mosquitoes would feast on us in our sleep. It really is hell on earth, especially in the heart of the city.

Does your family live in Dallas proper? Just curious, for all its flaws I love my city.

:pals:

[wildhorses]

7. actually they live in Richardson n/t

[Not_Giving_Up]

6. I'm a Texas Democrat

That makes me a Southerner in Hell already.

[Jamastiene]

8. North Carolina Democrat here.

I can second that reply. I've got the red state blues.