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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:06 PM
Original message
My Dad died almost two years ago and I still see him
Every couple of weeks, I see him. Not long ago I saw him in the garage and this morning I saw him sitting on the patio. My mother has also passed and I never see her although I fondly remember her and the time we had together. I don't understand the situation with my Dad. He never talks to me; he's just there. The first couple of times it happened it scared the hell out of me, now I expect it to happen.
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fooj Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:07 PM
Response to Original message
1. Same thing happened to me with my Nono..
It happens. I know that because I'm not nuts. At least I don't think that I am. LOL!

Peace.
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papau Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:14 PM
Response to Reply #1
26. And the same happens with my father and mother - but then I think
I may be nuts!

:toast:

But I work on just enjoying my grandkids - and smiling when I see them - or my parents!

:-)
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MadMaddie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:07 PM
Response to Original message
2. Bosshog were you close with your father?
Maybe he is just making sure you are okay!
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:10 PM
Response to Reply #2
13. We were close
I was closer to my Mom, but me and Dad got along great.
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porphyrian Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:08 PM
Response to Original message
3. Do you think it's an internal phenomenon or an external one?
Not that it really matters, as your perception dictates much of your reality, but do you think he's really there in some supernatural fashion, or is it in your head?
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Gormy Cuss Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:09 PM
Response to Original message
4. Good.
There are things about this universe that we just don't understand.
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az chela Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:09 PM
Response to Original message
5. Your are blessed
Your dad seems to want to be with you and so he is .When we leave this earth we still think and thoughts are things.
My son died 2 years ago and I would give anything to see him but I guess I am just afraid to really look
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Sequoia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:16 PM
Response to Reply #5
31. I'm so sorry about your loss.
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:09 PM
Response to Original message
6. I dream about my parents all the time.
and I hear my mom's voice a great deal. It is very comforting to me.
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Nabia2004 Donating Member (566 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:31 PM
Response to Reply #6
47. Same here, very vivid, very real
My father appears to me regularly, other close relatives not as often. What is interesting is that the dreams seem to be very real, everyone is alive, happy, and going about their normal life.

My grandmother was the same way. She use to tell me how she looked forward to sleeping, to dreaming and thus seeing her parents. Admittedly, I thought she was a little nuts at the time. She was known for being rather eccentric. Little did I know.
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:39 PM
Response to Reply #47
53. It's funny, because unless the dreams are happening to you,
you can't begin to imagine the vividness of them. In my dreams, we are all still living in my childhood home and everyone is healthy and happy.

Almost like reliving really good memories.
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tatertop Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:53 PM
Response to Reply #53
67. When out of body I often experience full tactile sensation
I can feel the wind on my face, touch the asphalt.
Sometimes I don't realize I am out of body, I will
feed the cats only to find out later the cats have not,
in fact, been fed at all.

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CountAllVotes Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:46 PM
Original message
same here!
I dream of my parents now and then. They are always together and happy and healthy, not sick. I lost my younger sibling a couple of years ago (cancer) and dreamed of him too and he was just fine.

Oddly, just yesterday I was telling some religious nut about this and was told I'd better pray for them because they might be in "purgatory" (!!!!). That was about the last thing I wanted to hear!

I believe you see and dream about your parents and other loved ones because they come to visit you in your sleep to let you know that they are still around and keeping an eye out for you. :D

To hell with the religious crap! :grr:

I'd give anything to see my parents again like you have seen your father since he passed away. My Dad has been gone for almost 10 years now and I miss him horribly as I do my dear Mother as well. :cry: Oh well ... life is short.

:kick:

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phylny Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:22 PM
Response to Reply #47
82. I dream of my mom every once in a while. She's there, doing everyday
things with us, and I always think, "I guess her cancer is still in remission, because she's still here!!"

Amazing.

A few nights after she died, I had a dream where she said very distinctly, "It's beautiful here." So, I don't worry :)
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zanne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 04:36 PM
Response to Reply #47
95. I had an aunt who was quite eccentric.
I thought she was really crazy because of the way she had been raised. A few years ago, my brother said to me "You remind me of Tante Solange". That was when I realized I take after her! (I don't ever see her, thank God).
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indie_voter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:46 PM
Response to Reply #6
59. I dream about my dad a lot too.
He died last year.

The other day I was driving my son to school when the grief hit harder than it had in a long time.

My family is/was atheists. I don't believe I'll ever see him again. However, I am open (and would be extremely happy) to the possibility I am wrong!

I often wonder what happens to our energy.

Regardless, my deepest condolences to all in this thread who lost loved ones.



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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:48 PM
Response to Reply #59
60. One of the reasons I have such a profoundly deep faith
is that I don't think I could bear it if I thought I would never see my loved ones again. I don't think I could get out of bed and face the day.
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CountAllVotes Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:49 PM
Response to Reply #59
63. I believe that people never really technically *die*
I believe their spirits and souls live forever personally. I never consider my parents to be "dead" so to speak. I feel them every day I am alive still. I wish they were still here for me to see, but that is just a wish that will never materialize most likely. :(

:kick:
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indie_voter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:01 PM
Response to Reply #63
69. I have no idea what happens
I watched my dad die, one minute he was there, the next gone. What happens to the energy of a living being (a soul? I don't know)?

Does the energy retain the memories stored in our organic brain (be it human or not)?

I personally don't see any evidence which would indicate it would, but then, there are many unknowns yet to be researched/discovered. (now I am channeling Rummy, shudder!) . So I wouldn't be so arrogant to state unequivocally "NO".

However until I see reproducible scientific evidence, I can't say I believe that my dad is 'out there'

However I wouldn't dismiss it out of hand either!

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EC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:11 PM
Response to Reply #69
75. I just figure that all of our unused brain, is the DNA material
brain (memories - innate knowledge) of all that came before us (people) in our family history that forms our DNA...this in my mind explains to me why sometimes I'm learning something new and I all of a sudden feel as if I already KNEW what I'm being taught for the first time...and explains talent...
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TexasLady Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:09 PM
Response to Original message
7. wow you are lucky!
I would love to see my dead brother. I dont even see him in my dreams..perhaps he crossed over?

I think that's really great!
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Atman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:09 PM
Response to Original message
8. My dad died over twenty years ago. I still see him.
Edited on Fri Feb-10-06 02:10 PM by Atman
Okay, not actually "see" him, but not a day goes by that I don't think of him. Especially now...in about eight weeks I turn the same age he was when he died. It freaks me out. I don't know if you're having apparitions or not, but I say go with it. Be happy you can still see him. It is much more preferable to forgetting about him.
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:36 PM
Response to Reply #8
51. Oh dear!
I am the same age my father was when he died, 52. I too am freaked out. In fact I just realized, I am now 1 day older than he was when he died. Whew...now we just have to get you through. Strange isn't it?
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tatertop Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:09 PM
Response to Original message
9. I experience something like that during an out of body experience
Are you 'psychic' in other ways?
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:12 PM
Response to Reply #9
20. Not that I know of
Every now and then I turn the corner and there he is.
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denidem Donating Member (44 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:10 PM
Response to Original message
10. I think that is a wonderful thing
Maybe he just wants you to know that he still exists. Or that he's watching over you, espescially in the rough times you have been having.
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laruemtt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:10 PM
Response to Original message
11. i wish i could see my dad.
maybe you could ask him next time you see him?

i often try to imagine what i would do if i saw pa down the street or something, and i know i'd run to him and hold him and kiss him. miss him tons and can't wait to see him again!
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Daphne08 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:10 PM
Response to Original message
12. Same with my grandfather. I moved into my grandparents
home after they passed away, and I saw, felt, smelled his presence for many years afterward.

No one in the family believed me except my youngest son.



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Ariana Celeste Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 04:55 PM
Response to Reply #12
97. I'm so glad you have someone that believes you.
My grandma sees departed family members once in awhile. And I'm the only one she trusts to talk about it with- because I've had weird things happen to me. She's afraid everybody else would think she's senile, and one of her sons is an Evangelist that believe spirits are actually demons trying to trick you. :eyes: I know it made her feel a lot better to have someone she could talk to about it- and it made me feel better to know I wasn't alone! It turned out that her sister and mother also saw things as well.
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amitten Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:10 PM
Response to Original message
14. That's really interesting. I've always wondered about ghosts...
Are they consciously staying in an area, or are their images simply energy 'fingerprints' left over from a previous life? There is no doubt anymore that they actually show up from time to time...there are far too many sane, normal people who have seen them to believe otherwise (myself included). I find the whole thing fascinating.

I hope seeing your father is a comfort...
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FreedomAngel82 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:16 PM
Response to Reply #14
30. Sometimes it depends
Sometimes a spirit can leave an imprint around. But you can usually feel the difference. I used to see and feel ghosts around here all the time. One was a veteran who fought in the civil war. He had on a blue uniform. And I've seen a woman from that time too in a pink fluffy dress and a hat to match. :) Sometimes seeing a ghost can be a great experience and sometimes they can be quite scary. You'll feel it. You should come by the astrology forum!
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amitten Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:44 PM
Response to Reply #30
56. Oh, I've seen a ghost. He was aware of me. But it seems like
some ghosts are unaware of others when spotted, while some are interactive. It interests me that there is a difference. So many things yet to be explained.
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EC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:20 PM
Response to Reply #30
80. That's interesting
One night I woke up with a start and there at the foot of my bed stood a young man, in an old time navy uniform...I asked who he was (I think it was telepathy, because I tried to scream first and couldn't) and he said he thought he was a brother-in-law....came to find out later that my husband's grandfather did have a child early in HIS navy days by another woman that he didn't marry
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Flirtus Donating Member (500 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
15. my dad stopped coming by once I got used to the idea he had
died, I think it was about twelve years, and I miss him now. It's nice that we can't explain everything.
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FreedomAngel82 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:18 PM
Response to Reply #15
33. You can always call him
Call him and see if he comes. My grandfather came by here a good while too and popped in and after a while he stopped coming by. He is with my grandmother now (she's still a live) watching over her so I see him then.
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tatertop Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:30 PM
Response to Reply #33
43. Does your grandmother see him as well?
Do you ever see him at the same time?
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Maine-ah Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
16. I think thats cool.
Edited on Fri Feb-10-06 02:12 PM by Maine-ah
first of all :hug:

thursday was 11 years, for my Dad, he was 50 years old. This was also one of those stupid years where the dates matched the days. So, sunday (11 years ago) he lost consciousness,had no oxygen for over 20 minutes, and thursday (11 years ago) we pulled the plug.

I wish I had your problem, Boss.
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CornField Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:11 PM
Response to Original message
17. Personal experience
When my spiritual guide first began to make appearances to me, it rather freaked me out. I would physically move away from the situation. Several months later a friend asked me, "Have you ever asked what he wants?" It seemed so simple, but I had never attempted it. Sure enough, that's exactly what I needed to do.

So, I offer you the same advice: Ask why he's there and/or what he wants.

Blessed be.
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tatertop Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:16 PM
Response to Reply #17
29. What did your spiritual guide look like?
What did you learn?
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CornField Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:30 PM
Response to Reply #29
46. Mine is a hawk
To be exact, he's a Cooper's Hawk although about twice the size of a 'normal' one. He's my lifelong guide. I currently have an additional guide with me, a ram, and I'm not exactly sure why she is here... although I think it has to do with a specific challenge I'll soon be facing.

I'm pretty open it about it, especially with those who have an honest interest. If you want to know anything else, feel free to PM me.
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Shine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 04:03 PM
Response to Reply #46
91. I think we all have spirit guides and totems and it's nice you've
consciously connected with yours.

Are you an Aries? the Ram is the symbol of Aries energy.

Maybe there's something for you about using the HEAD, which Aries rules, and using the Mind as a vehicle for Love/Wisdom which streams forth the essence of Life itself.

To be fully in the heart, one must have developed a keen mind.


:hi:

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FreedomAngel82 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:20 PM
Response to Reply #17
34. Yep
I remember my first experience with ghosts too. One of my spirit guides is my soul mate who stayed behind and I was home by myself and I heard him speak and it freaked me out because it was out of thin air. I was so scared and at first other things happened that scared me but you get used to it.
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GreenPartyVoter Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:12 PM
Response to Original message
18. My dad has seen my mom and has heard and smelled her too. She did
pass away in the house so this would not surprise me in the least if at least some part of her wasn't still there.

My mom talks to me. I don't hear her voice but just get "message feelings" from her.. or at least what my brain thinks she might have said. Honest to goodness I was getting dressed to go to the bank and thought it might look weird wearing kelly green socks with plum pants so I found some hot pink ones instead, except they don't match and are a shade off from each other. But I _swear_ I got a "wear them anyway, they still don't stand out as much as green would" message from mom. I mean, that is precisely what she would have if she'd been sitting there on the bed with me.

Wishful thinking or a direct line to the next plane, who knows? But I'm quite happy to think it's mom. Keeps her here with me that way. :)
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FreedomAngel82 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:23 PM
Response to Reply #18
37. I get that too
I get "message feelings" from my guides all the time when they feel it's necessary. They know I trust my feelings and it's the best way to send messages to me. :) So you must be the same way.
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Quakerfriend Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:12 PM
Response to Original message
19. That's very nice!
Several years ago, when I was very sick, this happened with me quite a bit. Many relatives who had crossed over visited me. Some were around more than others. Some spoke to me and others were just there.

What I learned from this is that they are really VERY close by, after they pass.

With me too, I would have thought that I might have seen my younger sister who passed away. But, she did not come thru this way.
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FreedomAngel82 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:13 PM
Response to Original message
21. Aw
:hug: Have you tried talking to him? Sometimes you don't need words. :) Just a presence. I've seen my grandfather too.
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stevedeshazer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:13 PM
Response to Original message
22. My dad died three years ago
I hear his voice often, but I never see him. I don't dream about him; it's when I'm wide awake. We were very close and I really miss him.
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LiberalinNC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:13 PM
Response to Original message
23. My grandmother has been dead since 1970 and I still see/feel her
My mother refuses to feel her presences, I generally feel grandma when mom is around, but when my sister and I were going through breast cancer, grandma was right there helping us through. I knew I would be fine because grandma was there protecting her grandchild.


BTW - I see my grandmother and my husband's grandparents every so often watching over us at night time. My husband's father has come to me only once to tell me that his mother would be fine. I honestly believe some of us have the connection and some of us don't. You are lucky to still have your dad w/ you.
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FreedomAngel82 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:24 PM
Response to Reply #23
38. It's all about believing and being open
We all can do it. You just have to believe and be open. If you're not ready they won't push you.
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LiberalinNC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:30 PM
Response to Reply #38
44. I completely agree; I tell my mom when I feel her mom in our presences
the oddest thing that happened was a few years ago, my mother's brother died, me, my mother's brother and sister the night he died all had the exact same dream. We all believe that it was my grandmother's way of letting us know that my uncle was w/ her now.
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npincus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:13 PM
Response to Original message
24. you're lucky.
I'd give anything to see my Dad again. He came and said good-bye to me in a dream, and I feel very thankful for that.

It sounds like your Dad is watching over you. How long to you see him for before he goes away/ vanishes?
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Sequoia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:21 PM
Response to Reply #24
36. Question for all of you who've seen....
Are you still living in the place/area where they died? Do these spirits travel to another state or country where you are living now?
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LiberalinNC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:28 PM
Response to Reply #36
42. My grandmother died when I was 5 and I lived in S. FL, she lived in
upstate NY, I now live in NC and I still feel/see her. Never meet my husband's grandparents OR his father (They lived/died in Atlanta) and have felt/see them all.
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:25 PM
Response to Reply #24
39. It last just a few seconds
I state intently then walk away. It used to be quite troubling but now I expect it to occur. He has never vanished, I just stop looking at him. Although I expect it now, I haven't gotten used to it.
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FreedomAngel82 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:26 PM
Response to Reply #24
41. My grandfather came to me in a dream once
Once shortly after my grandfather died last summer a few days after my birthday I got to have a special dream with just me and my grandfather. We were at a hospital and I was the only one who could see him. Not even my mother or grandmother could see him and we got to have a nice visit together and it was very much real. :) I loved it because I was missing him a lot at that time because it was still pretty fresh.
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cdb Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:14 PM
Response to Original message
25. Hmmm. I never see my dad....
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democrank Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:14 PM
Response to Original message
27. Boss....
I`m glad you have your father`s presence to hold on to.

Take care.
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Ezlivin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:15 PM
Response to Original message
28. This is why people believe in ghosts
When someone leaves our life our brains seek to fill the "vacuum". A nearly infinite number of cues, from sound to color to smells, can trigger our brains to match the cue with our memory. Sounds that loved ones used to make are linked with visual images. We hear a familiar sound and expect to see a familiar sight. We see movement and "fill in the blanks" with our memory.

We cohabited with a pair of cats for nearly 18 years. (We're a childless couple.) When the cats died within 5 days of each other we were suddenly left with an empty house. And cat ghosts. Both of us thought we were losing our minds. I'd hear a sound, turn my head and catch a glimpse of a cat going by. This continued to happen for a couple of weeks.

Eventually our brains adjusted to the absence of our cats and we "re-linked" the sounds in the house with more mundane things. Our cat ghosts vanished after that and never returned.

I suppose that our bond to our human relatives is much stronger than the one we'd have with a beloved pet. So I assume that the appearance of ghosts would be very likely.

That's what my rational mind tells me, that is....

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LittleClarkie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:17 PM
Response to Original message
32. I was a daddy's girl
I don't see him, but taking care of him at the nursing home for the last four years of his life still haunts me at times.



The mustache is drawn on. We know because we found a duplicate picture with no mustache. Wanted to see if it would look good. It did.



He died two years ago February 5th.

My condolences. I hope your father's continued presence is a blessing to you.
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:30 PM
Response to Reply #32
45. Thanks for the pics of your Dad
My Dad and I were both in the Navy. He was in a Nursing home for just a few months, but that was hell. He wanted to die at home so we brought him home and he had a hospital bed in the living room. We'd prop him up so he could see his horses in the field; that made him so happy. He slipped into a coma and died peacefully (I hope.)
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Rainscents Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:21 PM
Response to Original message
35. It's a gift you have, please, cherish it!
Edited on Fri Feb-10-06 02:22 PM by Rainscents
Not everyone has this gift. I had near death experience and I saw Angel taking my hands to take me with her and I could see, my body floating away from operating table.
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Yollam Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:26 PM
Response to Original message
40. Whatever the meaning...
...if the visions are benign, I would count myself fortunate. My parents are now at an age where their passing is clearly a reality to me, and I know I will miss them.

THis reminds me of times when I was a kid, and I used to sometimes hear my dad or mom calling me, even though I was the only one at home. It happened from time to time at their house, but I't never happened elsewhere. Weird.
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Stephanie Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:31 PM
Response to Original message
48. I love you BOSSHOG
Edited on Fri Feb-10-06 02:31 PM by Stephanie

I really do.
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:32 PM
Response to Reply #48
49. And I love you too Dear!
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:33 PM
Response to Original message
50. My sweet brother
puts his hands on my shoulders now and then. When he died 3 years ago I felt him with me from the moment of his death for about 6 months. It faded but now and again when I am upset my shoulders get warm and I feel the weight. It calms me like nothing else ever has. He knows I am miserable without him so he has never really left me.

It is really cool that you get to see your dad. I think when things like that happen they are just there to remind us that everything passes but that they never really leave those they love.
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bigscott Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:37 PM
Response to Reply #50
52. when my sister was killed
i dreamt about her a lot - but one day I KNOW it was not a dream, and she told me it was OK to be sad but she was in a better place - it was real, vivid, and I remember crying when she told me - it was not a dream
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MuseRider Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:44 PM
Response to Reply #52
57. They do still care for us.
I have never thought twice about it, if it was real or not. I just know it is. I don't know how or really even why but it is real.
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foreverdem Donating Member (759 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:48 PM
Response to Reply #52
61. I see my Dad sometimes
But it's only for a split second. Mostly when I'm either very worried about something, or when I'm not well, like when I had just gotten out of the hospital last summer. One time I dreamed of him when I was waiting for the results of some medical tests I had. We were crossing over a very turbulent river (my worries are always represented by water in my dreams) and I was afraid I was going to fall in. My dad took my hand, turned to me and said, don't worry, you'll be ok and we reached the other side. Then I woke up, thinking what an odd dream that was. When I got the test results that day, everything was fine. I honestly believe my Dad came to tell me not to worry.
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Carni Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:41 PM
Response to Original message
54. I had that happen with a nephew just ONCE
Scared the hell out of me...

He was tragically killed when he was four.

About 6 months after he died I walked into his living room and there he was laying on the floor watching TV with his brother and sister. He turned his head and looked me right in the face. It actually took me a second to realize what I was seeing should not be possible...I did a double take and he wasn't there.

I am assuming my brain was expecting to see him and developed the illusion accordingly, but that was one weird experience.

My father passed away about 5 years ago and I have never seen him hanging around anywhere--nor have I seen any other deceased relatives.

I don't know what the deal was with seeing my nephew but it was very strange!
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serryjw Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:43 PM
Response to Original message
55. I'm jealous
Could you please ask your dad to send my mom to me. She is gone almost 33 years. It would be great if she visited me every once in a while.
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Ecumenist Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:44 PM
Response to Original message
58. I think that your father is visiting to make sure you know he's okay..
I lost my mother in 2004, it will be two years on the 23rd of this month and I was so devastated. not because she died but the manner in which it happened. The friday after she crossed, my husband and I were at a mall, shopping for her memorial. I heard her call me by name as clearly as I see the nose on my face. I stopped, whirled around and looked into the direction I heard her voice. I also noted the time. My husband was trying to comfort me and telling me that it was just an extension of the deep grief I felt but I knew what I heard. The next day, I phoned my mother's sister in Tulsa Okalhoma,( I live in Northern California) and in the course of the conversation, I mentioned the experience from the night before. She told me that she had been in the back of my grandmother's home when she heard the closet doors moving, as if someone was just sliding the door open and closed. She stood there, not really believing what she was seeing when she heard my mother's voice call her by name, followed by giggling. When she gave me the time this happened, I realised that my mall experience and her hearing mom in the back bedroom had happened within a 5 minute period. There are huge numbers of people who experience what you have Boss and it in no way makes you crazy or weird. It's just that most people don't feel comfortable talking to others about their experiences.
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EC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:44 PM
Response to Reply #58
87. Wow,
my Mom swears to this day, that on the day my Dad died, (he died at the bowling alley, while bowling) that she was in the basement doing laundry and she heard the front door open and foot steps and heard my Dad say, "Enid, I'm home" so she went upstairs, he wasn't there and the phone rang...It was my Uncle calling from the bowling alley to tell her that Dad just died a few minutes ago...
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dweller Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:48 PM
Response to Original message
62. my grandma died at 98 1/2 years
the last 6-8 months of her life, she saw all her departed sisters and brothers and spoke with them all like they were there with her in her bedroom. I really believe they were welcoming her home, knowing she was coming to join them.

the best thing my dad and 3 uncles did was to allow her to live at her own home til her final days. For the last 4 years of her life, they paid a live-in nurse/companion to stay with her 5 days and the brothers would alternate weekends staying with her. She passed peacefully in her own bed, and i inherited that same bed. It must be close to 100 years old now, she and my granddad bought it early in their marriage.

Bosshog, have you ever thought of just sitting there with him and allowing what happens to happen?

dp
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:52 PM
Response to Reply #62
66. Although I now expect it, I still haven't gotten used to it
I may bring up the courage to talk to him next time. And these events always happen when I'm alone.
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dweller Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:10 PM
Response to Reply #66
74. i'm not saying you have to instigate anything
Edited on Fri Feb-10-06 03:13 PM by dweller
just allow what is happening to happen to fruition. You just went through (and are probably still experiencing) some trauma in your life due to Katrina. Consciousness has a way of bring to the forefront needed experiences. And if your dad is looking after you, in his way available to him, just acknowledging, allowing him to proceed with what comes next, may be good for you both. This is obviously happening for your benefit, whatever that may be.

Since you said you were expecting it now,(i had written 'accustomed', but you said you weren't used to it, so i've edited) perhaps you can welcome it and see what comes next.

peace.
dp
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renate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:06 PM
Response to Reply #62
72. about your grandmother's visits from her brothers and sisters
If you're interested in this topic, have you read "Final Gifts"? There are many excellent books about the dying process, but I reread this one recently so it comes to mind. (It's not only about visits from people who have died, it's about the whole experience of dying.)
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EFerrari Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:51 PM
Response to Original message
64. In my family, we talk to our dead. I talk to my grandmother or
my favorite uncle or someone nearly every day. We all do it.
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0007 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:52 PM
Response to Original message
65. The mind is a very powerful instrument.
It would seem to me that one would want to keep these experiences on a personal level. Not unless one is looking for more insight into the phenomenon from others.

These are my perceptions on spiritual experiences, I certainly wouldn't expose mine.
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renate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 02:59 PM
Response to Original message
68. as a hospice volunteer I heard these beautiful stories all the time
The people who saw their loved ones never said they had "visions" of their loved ones--they SAW them. The sightings that I have the strongest memories of are the ones when more than one family member saw the person who'd died, and there were a few occasions when there was a dog there who freaked out--so I really do believe that these things are absolutely real. Grief can make a mind play tricks, maybe even to the point where a person can feel a dead loved one is hugging them or touching them, but I don't think a "delusion" can be shared--if two or more people see the same thing close-up at the same time, or if a dog is flipping out when the loved one appears, it's not just a few neurons discharging. (Of course, the fact that the dogs would flip out rather than run to the person wagging their tails make it pretty clear that the loved one is different from their previous form in a very basic way, even though they look as solid as flesh and blood.)

Something that I think is important to know--and this isn't just from my experience but from several books I've read about the process of death and post-death experiences--is that whether or not a person reappears has almost nothing to do with the closeness of the relationship. (Well, usually if there was only a tenuous relationship, they don't appear, but I mean even people who had a loving relationship in life can't be guaranteed of visits after death.) So people who were very very close to the dead person can feel really cheated or wonder whether the relationship was as close as they'd thought, when they hear about other people getting to see their loved ones again. Who gets visits and who doesn't seems to be one of those mysteries that we'll only find the answer to when we join our loved ones who've died.
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:21 PM
Response to Reply #68
81. You hospice people are incredible
Several volunteers came to Dad's house in his last few months and they were angels on earth. Their incredible love of him and us was a beautiful thing to be a part of; and because of their efforts my stepmother's health was not worsened doing the biggest part of caring for Dad. Although the last month there wasn't much caring to do.
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Shine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 04:10 PM
Response to Reply #68
92. Hi renate! I am a hospice volunteer, as well.
Nice to "meet" you! :pals:

Yes, doing this work is a great and profound privilege. Besides offering practical and emotional support to the patients and their families, we are bearing sacred witness to the Mystery of life and death.

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EC Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:02 PM
Response to Original message
70. Well, remember we are all just atoms of energy and when
Edited on Fri Feb-10-06 03:03 PM by EC
our physical bodies die, the energy has to go somewhere, so in essence they are still here.

I see my Dad now and then, or hear him...the same with my Grandma...just the people I felt closely too (and looked like physically)

The same time of my Dad's death, I felt a strong pulling in my head like something was leaving me...he was at least 15 miles away and died suddenly without any warning or illness prior...but when my Mom called to tell me, I knew already...I think his energy that sparked my life was going back into his spirit (or whatever you want to call it - nucleus, whatever)


On edit: Sometimes I see one of my cats that died walking around the house too...
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renate Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:35 PM
Response to Reply #70
85. your mentioning your cat reminded me of something
Our cat's been dead for a couple of years. The other day I was going out to the car and saw "her" running towards me, and automatically I said "Hi, sweetie," because it just seemed natural to see her, even after all this time. However, a split second later, I realized that it was just a neighborhood cat with the same markings, and I fully knew it wasn't her.

The people who've seen their loved ones don't have that "D'oh! Of course that wasn't really her" feeling afterwards. Almost always, they are absolutely certain. They look at the person full on (not out of the corner of their eye, and usually not for just a fraction of a second) and they never have that feeling afterwards that I did the other day of realizing that of course they were just imagining things. Something about the experience stays real enough to them that they're willing to tell a virtual stranger about it. And these weren't in group meetings where one person says "Hey, a funny thing happened" and then everybody else feels brave enough to join in. Each and every time I've heard these stories, it's been from someone who doesn't know about the other people I've talked to who've experienced similar things (I've never been the one to bring it up).
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:03 PM
Response to Original message
71. That is so cool!
I belong to a Mensa parapsychology group. Do you mind if I share your story with them?

We've had many, many conversations about such things and the general consensus is that there is no absolute reason for people seeing "ghosts". No proof of anything, psychologically or "spiritually". It's all theory. However, the one thing that everyone agrees upon is that attempting to communicate with the apparition is a good thing to do. If it's a psychological situation, as some theories point to, then you can expect some level of psychological "relief" or insight. If it is really a ghost, then communication may help you learn something.

Have you ever acknowledged his presence? Are you opposed to speaking to him? I think it would be interesting to see if you get a response.

I find all this very fascinating!

The only thing "weird" that has happened to me recently is the buffet in my house moved out from the wall about four inches on one end. This is a very heavy piece of furniture and it is loaded with very heavy china.

Keep us posted if you decide to acknowledge your father's presence!
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:13 PM
Response to Reply #71
76. Don't mind at all
It still makes me a little uncomfortable but I think I'm gonna try to talk to him next time. Its rather bizarre and there is no warning. I look out the window and there he is. I walked into the garage and there he is. One time he was sitting on the couch in the living room. It always happens when I'm alone. And it always happens around the house, in other words, I don't see him elsewhere. And it only last for a few seconds.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:40 PM
Response to Reply #76
86. Sounds like it happens fairly regularly!
If you don't mind me suggesting, try greeting him as you did in life. "Hi Dad!", or whatever you used to do.


Man! I've ALWAYS wanted to experience something like this! I had bizarre poltergeist experiences when I was young, but never anything as cool as this! The parapsychology SIG is talking about a "ghost hunt" type outing... I hope it happens somewhere close so I can participate. Our group is spread all over the world, so who knows.
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jsamuel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:10 PM
Response to Original message
73. This is just my opinion, but...
You may want to tell him that you are ok, everything is ok, and he can move on.

I don't really know the situation, but the worst case senario is that he is stuck for some reason and it seems to have something to do with you. It would be best for him if he could move on.
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Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:14 PM
Response to Reply #73
77. from reading on the subject - I have read the same
thing. I think if someone visits you all the time, they have not let go of the earthly life yet.
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BOSSHOG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:15 PM
Response to Reply #73
78. Never thought of it that way
I'm gonna work up the courage to talk to(with) him.
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Call Me Wesley Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 04:40 PM
Response to Reply #78
96. It'll be great if you do it.
Let him now that he's free now. I know it sounds quite odd, but it'll do both of you good.

My dad died of non-Hodgskin's Lymphoma in 1990. Yet there is a picture that my mom took of my sisster and her daughters in front of a store in Italy in 2001. And, believe it or not, there's my dad showing in the window, mirrored from the street, smiling.

I did sense him a few times (we did go along so well), but it seems to have come to an end, which is good. We both needed to go on.
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LuCifer Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:20 PM
Response to Original message
79. Reincarnation is REAL!
It's the ONE issue I am at odds with with the C.O.S., cuz yeah I see Anton LaVey's point to live it up, you only live once, make the most of your life NOW! But folks, I've seen too damn much evidence of it. Today would have been my mother's 67th birthday, and she died Mar. 10th, 2003...yeah, one month exactly after her 64th birthday. So, I'd like to give a nice hardy SCREW YOU to the scumbags infesting 1600 PA Ave for doing all they can to kill stem cell research. Godcrap, even NANCY REAGAN is with us on this issue!!!!!!!!!

Peace out to ya Boss. Blue Southerners, UNITE!
Lu Cifer, and no, I'm not afraid of going to Hell, we're already there so long as there are people who support Bush!
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Blue_Tires Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:24 PM
Response to Original message
83. i had a dog years ago that i can still hear, smell and touch...
strange
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:44 PM
Response to Reply #83
88. My kids have heard our dearly departed dog walking through the kitchen
and on the wood floor in the dinningroom... he was huge... 130 lbs, so it is unlikely that it could be my daughter's Chihuahua making the noise. Also, the Chihuahua refuses to eat from his dish when it is in the same location the old dog's dish was kept. We think maybe he sees the old dog and is afraid to go over there. If you move his dish to the center of the kitchen, he chows down just fine. Put it back to the old spot and he stands there looking at it and shivers.
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Chemical Bill Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:26 PM
Response to Original message
84. Watch the movie "Truely, Madly, Deeply"
It's an English flick with Alan Rickman. It's about this very thing, and I found it very touching.

I make it a point to talk to my friends and relations that are gone.

Bill
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 05:21 PM
Response to Reply #84
99. I have a friend who sees Elves
And he communicates with his deceased sister almost daily. His wife has seen a few things happen, but has never seen the Elves. She said his pillow was yanked out from under his head one day when he tried to sleep in. He awoke with his sister giggling at him. That very same day, as he was driving through the woods near their home, he heard his sister yell, "Swerve!" He did, and avoided hitting a deer.

They routinely set extra places at the table, talk to their dear departed relations, etc. I told him about my buffet moving and he said, isn't that the buffet with all the old, old pictures of your ancestors on it? Yep. He said I instinctively created a "shrine" to them, and that moving the buffet was their way of getting my attention. He said to talk to the pictures... I do... when no one is looking:)
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bigtree Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:50 PM
Response to Original message
89. This is more common than I once thought
It hasn't happened to me, but I once asked a few of my co-workers about the possibility of such an experience being real and I found some surprisingly grounded folks with some bizzare stories about seeing and talking to dead relatives. I now believe something real did occur, but I've no way to account for it. I don't know if I'm happier in my own shoes, or would be in theirs, or yours.
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LaurenG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 03:52 PM
Response to Original message
90. Me too
he died Jan 2005. :hug:
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Shine Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 04:14 PM
Response to Original message
93. There are some things we are not meant to understand in our heads
but in our HEARTS.

:hug:

Blessings of love and light to you and your beloved dead, BOSSHOG. What is remembered, lives. O8)
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 05:26 PM
Response to Reply #93
101. Well said!
Yes, the amount we know, about everything (and I mean EVERYTHING!), is equal to one grain of sand. What we do not know is equal to all the sand on all the beaches of the world.
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Rowdyboy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 04:29 PM
Response to Original message
94. I feel my mom's presence sometimes, and clearly smelled her perfume
once. I envy you.
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JuniperLea Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 05:23 PM
Response to Reply #94
100. Maybe you should try talking to her
She could still be around:)
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Hobarticus Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 04:56 PM
Response to Original message
98. My mother passed in September....wish she'd visit, too
I'd sure like to see her once again. But I imagine she's playing cards and drinking Bloody Marys with the aunts.
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Midlodemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-11-06 11:22 AM
Response to Reply #98
103. You will.
I have found that as I am falling asleep if I think about my mom, I dream of her.
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Sequoia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Fri Feb-10-06 07:45 PM
Response to Original message
102. Look at this story!
Political whodunit takes an eerie twist

BIRMINGHAM, Alabama (AP) -- More than five years ago, Rod Spraggins made a sensational charge at a candidate forum, publicly accusing a political opponent of murder with nothing to back up the allegation except, it turns out, a vision.

<snip>

Barry Waites, Spraggins' opponent in the 2000 race for Lanett City Council, was arrested this week on murder charges in the 1998 slaying of his wife, who was found dead in their split-level home in this sleepy town of 8,000 along the Georgia line.

In 2002, Spraggins, a bail bondsman, stunned a crowd of 100 when he accused Waites of killing his wife and dared the man to sue him for slander if he was wrong.

<snip>

In an otherwordly turn to the saga Friday, Spraggins disclosed that he never had any evidence to make the accusation and that it was based entirely on Mrs. Waites' appearing to him in a series of dreams.

<snip>

http://www.cnn.com/2006/LAW/02/10/political.whodunit.ap/index.html
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Beausoir Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Feb-11-06 12:05 PM
Response to Original message
104. I believe you. It has happened to me.
My dad used to make his presence known for me.

The first time was the day after his funeral. I had to fly back to my home and he "sat" with me on the plane. I am a white knuckle flier. He just "sat" with me until I got home. The comfort he brought me was miraculous.

I actually "saw" him several times the first year of his death, but I haven't "seen" him for a long time now. Sounds crazy, I know. For those who have experienced it, it's so real.

My mother passed away a year ago. This past Christmas morning I was awakened by the sound of her laughter ringing out through my house. It was clear as a bell and so beautiful. It made me realize that she is still with me.
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