prolesunited
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:04 PM
Original message |
If your parent(s) are still living, how often do you call or visit? |
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Why so much or why not more? Just curious.
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GOPisEvil
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:05 PM
Response to Original message |
1. When we're all home, I see them weekly. |
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I live about 80 miles away, and we have dinner most weeks, and spend holidays together, etc.
I don't know how we settled on weekly, but it works.
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musical_soul
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:07 PM
Response to Original message |
2. I call two or three times a week. |
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I visit once in two months.
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proud2BlibKansan
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:08 PM
Response to Original message |
3. I call my mom every day |
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and go see her once a week at least.
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Maddy McCall
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:16 PM
Response to Reply #3 |
9. Yes, I talk to my mom every day, too. |
proud2BlibKansan
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:23 PM
Response to Reply #9 |
11. I don't always get to talk to her |
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Sometimes she is too distracted to come to the phone. But I can talk to her nurse or my sister.
Mom is going in to a nursing home soon and I won't be able to call every day then. :cry:
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Maddy McCall
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:29 PM
Response to Reply #11 |
proud2BlibKansan
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:33 PM
Response to Reply #16 |
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I am just glad she is still here.
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miss_american_pie
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:08 PM
Response to Original message |
4. I talk to my mom every day |
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and see her at least once a week. Talk to my dad once and see him once/week.
My hubby talks to his parents once or twice a week, and gets out to see them most weekends.
It's much more often now since we had kids.
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supernova
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:10 PM
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5. It was weekly when they were living |
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I visited about once a month and called most Sundays. I think being on a regular schedule made both parties feel good. They knew I would always call and didn't worry so much.
It was harder when I lived in DC and they still lived here. I did miss them.
I mostly call my sister about once every 2 weeks now or she calls me.
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Maddy McCall
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:12 PM
Response to Original message |
6. I see them two or three times a week. |
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No more or less than I ever have when I live near them. When I lived away from them, I saw them maybe twice a year.
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Magrittes Pipe
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:13 PM
Response to Original message |
7. My dad calls me about 18 times a day. |
prolesunited
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:32 PM
Response to Reply #7 |
LeftyMom
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:14 PM
Response to Original message |
8. I call my mother or she calls me about once a week |
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I see her maybe once a month or so, which really isn't often enough condiering she lives maybe five miles away. We're both busy and our schedules conflict, so she drops by when she can to see me and LK and I go over there on holidays.
My Dad lives a little farther away and is an antisocial workaholic, so I see him somewhat less often.
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Thtwudbeme
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:17 PM
Response to Original message |
10. 3-4 times a week, sometimes more |
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I lived a mile from them 'til we moved to Siberia, NC.
How are you? Is the St. John's Wort helping? This winter crap is brutal.
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prolesunited
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:41 PM
Response to Reply #10 |
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Definitely not up to par, but I haven't had any blind rage for about a week now. I guess that's something. Thanks for asking.
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Thtwudbeme
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:45 PM
Response to Reply #22 |
23. I went through some horrible crap |
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after getting married and moving to Siberia.
I found out that women who get married at my age (39-mid forties) go through horrible depression.
When I talked to a counselor, and she started describing stuff to me (loss of absolute privacy) I almost started crying in relief that someone at least understood.
It's really weird--I love being married, but I miss "my place."
Winter, professional job stuff...big changes...it's hard as hell!
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DODI
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:24 PM
Response to Original message |
12. Visit twice a day, call three times - for meds and I love her. |
zone
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:25 PM
Response to Original message |
13. My dad is 73, retired since 57 and in good health |
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I have three kids and a full-time job. He lives in Arizona and I live in Pennsylvania. He has visited twice since we moved here from Oregon in 2000. We have not been to visit him in Arizona; which I chalk up to being busy and to the incredible expense of carting a family across the country (we are basically a one-income household). My mom, who was divorced from my father, past away four years ago next August. We went to visit her five times the 16 months we were in Oregon before moving to Pa. She never once visited us, nor did by brother who lived in her town about a 3 1/2 hours drive away. My mom and sister hadn't spoken in 20 years when my mom died. In fact the only time my mom ever met my sister's daughter--her own granddaughter--was when I absconded with her one time when we were all gathering and my brother's house. Fucked up family.
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Midlodemocrat
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:26 PM
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14. When my mom was alive, I called her 3-4 times a day. |
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AFter she passed away, my dad came here to be with us.
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greatauntoftriplets
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:27 PM
Response to Reply #14 |
15. Me too on calling my mother. I miss that. |
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Sadly, my father died 13 1/2 years before she did.
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prolesunited
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:33 PM
Response to Reply #15 |
19. You'll always miss it |
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But it does get better. :hug:
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greatauntoftriplets
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:38 PM
Response to Reply #19 |
Midlodemocrat
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Sat Feb-11-06 11:25 AM
Response to Reply #15 |
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I counted the days since I had heard her voice. Then she started appearing in my dreams. I have to admit, it is supremely comforting.
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greatauntoftriplets
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Sat Feb-11-06 03:57 PM
Response to Reply #45 |
46. I haven't dreamed about her yet.... |
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though I still now and then dream about my father, who has been gone 13 1/2 years. Had one about him a couple weeks ago.
Thanks for the suggestion. :hi:
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prolesunited
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Sat Feb-11-06 07:13 PM
Response to Reply #45 |
48. I had those dreams, too |
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I was a total mess for a year after she died and it took me at least two before I could even talk about it.
I know I'll be sad when my dad dies, but it won't be the same kind of all-consuming grief.
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bertha katzenengel
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:35 PM
Response to Original message |
20. My dad. We exchange bday/xmas cards, he gets one for father's |
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day if i'm up to it that year, and I usually see him for dinner whenever I go home.
He was not a good father, and he thinks I'm going to hell because I'm gay. But blood calls to blood, and the pull is very, very strong. Besides, I believe in forgiveness. I may have to do it often, but I do it because I need to. I can't hold a grudge; it kills the soul.
:shrug:
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LSK
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:51 PM
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leftofthedial
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:52 PM
Response to Original message |
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my mom is old and in poor health
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alarimer
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:52 PM
Response to Original message |
26. Call once a month or so |
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Visit once a year. Whether I need it or not. LOL
actually they mught be coming to Texas soon. They have some tickets from thier aborted trip to New Orleans (sceduled for the same week a Katrina) that they have to use before July. Fortuately they can't stay with me as my apartment is too small.
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ChoralScholar
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:54 PM
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27. My mother passed away in 2002, |
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My dad still lives about 2 hrs away. I call him about every afternoon, or at least 4 times a week.
I get to go by about once a month.
I wish I lived closer, but I moved to a town where I could make a better living for my family.
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Left Is Write
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:55 PM
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28. I call pretty frequently, except when they are in Texas ... |
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they spend January, February, and the first week of March in Texas, and they're always on the beach or at the pool or at a get-together, so they're harder to reach.
Mom emails me every other day or every couple of days, even when they're in Texas.
When they are home, I call 2-3 times a week.
We go visit them once a year, and they come here once or twice a year. Why not more? It's too expensive to travel more often than that for us, and for them, I have another out-of-state sister they go to visit also.
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NNadir
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Fri Feb-10-06 10:57 PM
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29. My parents are dead, but my stepmother is alive. |
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I love her very much, but I don't see her as much as I would like, two or three times a year. The last time was very sad, my step-brother's funeral.
My in-laws (who upset my wife to no end) live closer, and we see them about once a month. They make my wife nuts. The last time we saw them they pushed all her buttons. She's taking a break. I can't say I blame her.
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Neshanic
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Sat Feb-11-06 12:46 AM
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30. Father dead, Mother never calls. Gay son you know... |
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She is to borrow a line, "an absolute horror of a human being."
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Kickin_Donkey
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Sat Feb-11-06 12:48 AM
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31. I talk to my parents about once a week ... |
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Did I mention that I live in the same house with them?
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Beware the Beast Man
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Sat Feb-11-06 12:49 AM
Response to Original message |
32. I call my mom every two weeks or so. |
KyndCulture
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Sat Feb-11-06 12:53 AM
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33. My parents and I are estranged... it's been 4 yrs since we've spoken. |
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long story not for here...
it's for the best.
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GoddessOfGuinness
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Sat Feb-11-06 01:02 AM
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34. At least once a week, I call my mom. |
devilgrrl
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Sat Feb-11-06 01:09 AM
Response to Original message |
35. I used to call every other day but I'm kind of pissed at them... |
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they play favorites with the grandchildren and it really ticks me off and I'm still miffed about a blowout we had this past summer. :mad: So I haven't been calling much lately. :-(
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Roon
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Sat Feb-11-06 01:15 AM
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36. I am doing business with my Mother |
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I am doing cleaning and light repair work on her rental house, so i am in touch with her 2-3 times a week. I talk to my Father every other month or so.
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liberaltrucker
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Sat Feb-11-06 01:21 AM
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37. I call Mom every weekend |
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When on the road. And visit every day when home.
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terrya
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Sat Feb-11-06 09:59 AM
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38. I call my mom once a week |
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I don't visit as often as I should. She lives downstate...it's not like she's halfway around the world or anything. That is my bad.
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LaurenG
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Sat Feb-11-06 10:06 AM
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39. Since my Dad died last year I probably talk |
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to my mom 4-5 x a week. She needs us more now.
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kedrys
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Sat Feb-11-06 10:10 AM
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40. Weekly phone calls, twice-a-year visits |
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They're snowbirds: Montreal in the summer and Fort Lauderdale in the winter. We're in Texas. We'd love to visit more, but the airfares can be insane. We visit them in Florida during the holidays, and do our best to save up to invade them in Montreal around late June early July - just in time for the International Jazz Festival.
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InsultComicDog
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Sat Feb-11-06 10:10 AM
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41. I speak with them on the phone probably 4 to 5 times a week |
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but I haven't been over there for about a month and a half.
Typically we go over to visit every few months or so but I had a work assignment near them last summer and saw them nearly every day then.
They live about an hour away so it isn't that big a deal to get over there but it isn't trivial either.
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Tom_Foolery
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Sat Feb-11-06 10:56 AM
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42. I talk to them everyday and see them about every other day. |
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Someday I won't have them, so I spend as much time as possible with them. Or they might not have me. Who knows?
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eyesroll
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Sat Feb-11-06 11:14 AM
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43. I talk to them weekly, see them monthly, e-mail in between if something's |
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important.
No real reason -- just a pattern we settled on when I was in college that I kind of stuck to.
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hyphenate
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Sat Feb-11-06 11:22 AM
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44. Since I have unlimited long distance |
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I call my mom in L.A. about two, three times a day. She's not in the best of health, so I try to talk with her when I can, whether it's on the home phone or on the cell.
My dad passed away 22 years ago.
I've always made it a habit to talk with my mom on a regular basis. In my entire life, I have tried to do it at least once a day if more was not possible. It's ironic that she worries more about my sister who never calls her at all.
When I was very young, I think one thing that influenced me was people who died and their identity was not known. I always swore that that would never happen to me, so I do try to let someone know where I'm at most of the time. Perhaps it's neurotic, but it makes me feel better.
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TheProphetess
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Sat Feb-11-06 05:39 PM
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47. I call a few times per week and visit once per week or two |
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They live an hour away from me and they're getting older, plus they're the greatest parents. Always so full of love, acceptance, understanding, and forgiveness. Couldn't have asked for sweeter folks.
They love my husband and they are amazing grandparents to my sisters' children. My hope is that I have children while they are still able to enjoy grandparenthood.
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seaglass
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Sat Feb-11-06 07:17 PM
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49. I'm feeling horribly guilty after reading this. I do call my mom |
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a minimum of once a week, it used to be more but every time we are on the phone it is at least an hour long.
So, to those of you who call a few times a week - how long is each conversation?
I talk to my dad very infrequently because he despises talking on the phone (no, really - he didn't know his best friend of 20 years telephone number because he never called). I see him almost once a month on holidays and family birthdays.
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AtomicKitten
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Sat Feb-11-06 07:20 PM
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50. My father died 1/30/06 and I hadn't seen my parents in over 10 years. |
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I'm self-employed with my son in year-round college, and we just could never get our act together to go visit. Funny, at XMAS I told him and my mom we would try to come down this summer.
I hope this encourages others to MAKE the time because life may intervene unexpectedly.
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AlCzervik
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Sat Feb-11-06 07:24 PM
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51. My Dad is still living, he lives in ma, i live in ca so i don't him more |
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than every 2 years or so, he doesn't like travel, even to see his grandchild. I talk to him about 2 weeks or so on the phone. He a great go to guy for anything you might need fixed or if you f'd up your taxes but as Dad---not so much. He's got a wonderful wife though, hopefully he won't screw it up.
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