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I'm 22 1/2 and have no idea what i'm doing anymore...and i'm scared *less

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CarpeDiebold Donating Member (652 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Mon Apr-10-06 11:56 PM
Original message
I'm 22 1/2 and have no idea what i'm doing anymore...and i'm scared *less
since we're on a roll of confession threads, i'll add mine. i used to think i knew what i wanted to do, and busted my ass for years, and now i feel completely lost. i'm terrified that if i don't figure things out soon, my life will spin out of control. and i don't know who to turn to for some guidance and an idea of what i need to be doing.
i just wish i had a map to tell me where i'm headed and where i stand now. for all i know, i'm headed for a life of constant mediocrity.

just a sign to tell me i'm on the right track...is that too much to ask...
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gardenista Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 12:27 AM
Response to Original message
1. Hey, you are supposed to be asking these questions at your age
It's ok to be unsure of exactly what you want to do right now.

Your early twenties are for exploring.

What do you love to do?

Susan Sontag said,"That which keeps you from your work has become your work". I don't know if that will mean anything for you, but when I was around your age, it opened my eyes about what I wanted to do.
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last_texas_dem Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 12:27 AM
Response to Original message
2. Whoa
Edited on Tue Apr-11-06 12:28 AM by last_texas_dem
I feel like I could have written your thread exactly; same age, formerly feeling like I had more of an idea what I was doing, feeling like I'm headed for a life of constant mediocrity, etc.- everything! I wish I had some "words of wisdom" to write but I can't think of any (guess that makes sense since I'm feeling lost myself) so I guess I'm just writing to reassure you that you're not alone among the lost and uncertain. For whatever (probably very little) that's worth! :-)
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radwriter0555 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 12:29 AM
Response to Original message
3. Honey.... I'm in my 40's and I still don't k know 'what I want to do when
I grow up..."

Yet, I have a successful business, made a pile of money off the stock market and real estate.. have a nice little VERY unorthodox family and live in the south of France, having felt I could no longer support the USA, etc.

I've been doing what I like, going with the flow, finding out what I'm good at, what I'm not so good at. And now, as 50 approaches... I feel like I should DO something, but I still don't know what it is.

SO, I'm just going to continue to do what I like, enjoy myself... do more traveling around my new continent. I want to buy a house so I can turn it around like I did in the US. I'm good at renovations and rehabs, etc.

Chill. You're still a young 'un. The point to life is to enjoy it. Find something you're good at and do it. For now. It doesn't have to be for forever. We're not all destined to be movie stars and president, I learned.

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bluesbassman Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 12:30 AM
Response to Original message
4. Do what you WANT to do.
Do you like music? Be a musician. Do you like to paint? Be an artist. Do you like the outdoors? Be a park ranger. My point is that following your heart's desire will never let you down. If you're in it for the money you'll never be happy. One day you'll wake up with a fat bank account and wonder what you did with your life. That doesn't mean you can't do something that makes a lot of money, I'm just saying that whatever you do, do because you want to. Don't ever do something because you think it's the acceptable thing to do, or because someone told you you would be really successful at it. Just figure out what it is that you are really passionate about and follow that. BTW, financial reward usually comes when you follow your heart, but if it doesn't you won't care because you're doing what you love.

P.S. Not to sound condescending, but at 22 1/2 you need to lighten up on yourself. Take a year off - go work at a ski resort or something else fun and get your head clear. The world will still be here when you get back!
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Langis Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 12:31 AM
Response to Original message
5. When I was 22 I think I felt about the same...
Edited on Tue Apr-11-06 12:32 AM by Langis
Now I'm 26 and a lot has changed. Some good some bad, either way I'm much happier now then when I was 22. Hope that helps :bounce:
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SoCalDemGrrl Donating Member (786 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 12:31 AM
Response to Original message
6. Carpe. don't beat yourself up.. we've all been there at 1 time or another,
at least those of use over a certain age. You're at a crossroads, it's an opportunity to rethink your priorities.
The thing is don't be afraid of CHANGE, you will be doomed for a life of mediocrity if you are resistant to change. You say you busted your ass for years, but the fact that you realize now that it's not what you should be doing is a gift. It's pathetic when you meet someoone who has spent decades doing something they hated and is trapped in a meaningless existence. You're only 22 and now's the time to take chances,try new avenues and if they don't work out for you, move on. There is no roadmap, but if you keep pursuing the things you love, your life will be fulfilling.


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dorktv Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 12:31 AM
Response to Original message
7. of course you are on the right track...you are going to be a huge success
and all your DU friends will be able to borrow money off of you.
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Oeditpus Rex Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 12:34 AM
Response to Original message
8. I'm 50 years and six days old
and I still don't know what I wanna do when I grow up. :shrug:

But, what the hell? You can't beat life, so you may as well just enjoy the ride. :bounce:
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clyrc Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 12:41 AM
Response to Original message
9. I was scared when I was 22, also
I was so absolutely sure my life would never be what I wanted it to be, but I was wrong. I have a friend now who is 22, and I tell him almost daily that his fears are natural for his age. If you are prepared and you have a ball park idea of what you want to do, sometimes it just takes a little bit of treading water before your life takes its shape.
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hfojvt Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 03:28 AM
Response to Original message
10. there is no right track
but if you are able to keep moving forward that could be taken as a sign.
I think it is kinda odd to have options. As a college student, clearly I had some - I could decide which classes to take and which major to pursue. However, having graduated, I had much fewer. My options basically were to fling my resume into the job market and hope to land a job. Bascially, other than DoD, I found nothing. So I went back to school, throwing good time after bad. Gee, if one degree is worthless, another one is going to help, right? In retrospect, perhaps one more degree would have accomplished something, plus giving me the title which I use fradulently now anyway. But I spent seven years in the school of "starting your own business from scratch" and also "working grunt jobs". After the business, the "grunt jobs" rut has continued, and my escape hatch of more school fizzle out.

Has it been a life of "constant mediocrity"? Perhaps, although I think I have done my low status jobs quite well, and accomplished many other non work, non status things. I will give one piece of advice though, FWIW - do not give up on your dreams. I had plans when I was 24, and I told people about them and they laughed and said it would never work, and I let that become a self-fulfilling prophecy, aided by the discouragement of "betrayal" by people I had considered friends, even when I had tried to steel myself against such possibilities. Do not let the bastids and the nay-sayers get you down. Because "people can be so cold. They'll hurt you, and desert you. Well they'll take your soul if you let them, but don't you let them ..."
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mykpart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Apr-11-06 03:39 AM
Response to Original message
11. While it's good to have goals,
you also have to be flexible. I acquired all kinds of skills that are now obsolete, like keypunch, teletype, switchboard. At your age I was a homemaker, at 27 a divorced secretary, at 31 a college student, at 40 an accountant, at 52 a new bride. So head where you want, but be alert to taking a new road if need be. And good luck. And don't forget to enjoy the journey.
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