Police arrest naked man after he flails car with a stolen pigeon

[NNN0LHI]

http://home.hamptonroads.com/stories/story.cfm?story=107685&ran=115699

SUFFOLK - A naked man clutching a pigeon was arrested over the weekend after beating the bird against a car.

Two Whaleyville residents had just pulled into their driveway Friday night when Juan Lopez, 30, of Kellam Road in Virginia Beach came up and repeatedly pounded the pigeon on the car, police said. The people got out of the car and went to a neighbor's house, where they called the police.

After a short chase, police caught Lopez in nearby woods.


Slow news day.

[JVS]

1. He was naked and "clutching a pigeon"

:rofl:

[zanne]

2. You couldn't make that up.

I'm sorry for the pigeon, but that headline is hilarious.

[NewWaveChick1981]

3. What was matcom doing in Suffolk?

I mean, he's usually naked and clutching a pigeon and all, but he traveled to that... :P

:hi:

[xchrom]

4. matcom has some 'splainin to do!

[matcom]

5. hey! i didn't KNOW it was a pigeon!

honest! :rofl:

[xchrom]

11. ...

:spray:

[NewWaveChick1981]

16. Suuuuuure... we've heard that before.

:rofl: :hi:

[NewWaveChick1981]

15. You bet he does.

:hi: :P

[RedCloud]

7. Maybe he couldn't stay at the Norfolk Innway?

To those unfamiliar "Norfolk" is pronounced Nah Fuk by the locals there...

Just saying :shrug:

[Mutley]

14. I pronounced it "Nor fek " when I lived there.

:shrug:

[NewWaveChick1981]

17. They ran him out of there too...

:hi:

[LeftyMom]

6. "larceny of poultry"

That's one of the charges. Not larceny or petty theft or something, but larceny of poultry? Apparently enough of a problem that it's a separate crime all on it's own. Who knew. :shrug:

[Kat45]

8. The poor pigeon.

Sounds like a painful way to go. :-(

[idgiehkt]

9. sorry but this is what I thought of when I read this

He looks at me hopeless with tears in his eyes
Goes out of the window and up on the roof
Naked man, naked man calm down!
I-I'll give you some strawberry cake

Don't act like there is no tomorrow
You should use the pain and the sorrow
To fill you up with power
Life's both sweet and sour!
Sugarcubes - F*cking in Rhythm and Sorrow.

and that totally sucks for the pidgeon.

[pitohui]

12. he murdered FOUR pet pigeons

but will anyone call for this man to be buried alive in prison as they would if he had killed even one little kitten and used its corpse to bang on a car?

sure the dude has issues but this is clearly animal cruelty


not real funny

[MrScorpio]

10. All kinds of weird shit happening around these parts

C'mon down

[texanwitch]

13. Watching Bush over these last few days just made this poor man

crazy, but he didn't have to take it out on the pigeon.