I Want To Move Back HOME!!!

[crim son]

This house, this town and this state - hell, this whole country - are full of too many bad memories and too many fuckups. I think for the first time in my life, the little voice inside my head is saying "RUN AWAY! RUN AWAY!"

Have you ever had that feeling? Like being a child and wanting to run and hide from the mess you made of things?

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

1. Yeah.

:hug:

[crim son]

6. ...

:hug:

[miss_american_pie]

2. Oh hell yeah

It's been the motivation behind quite a few road trips.

:hug:

[crim son]

5. For me, it's a novelty.

I'm more of a forge ahead come hell or high water type of person. But I woke up today and realized I have no reason to love being where I am. If the kids were young or if they were much older, I'd start again alone. If that would be taking the easy way out then I rather believe it's time for something easy.

[hickman]

3. Yes. Many times.

Never could though, so I just always had to wade through the mess. If it helps, you always get to the other side. Good luck.

[crim son]

7. Thanks.

I'm good at wading too.

[graywarrior]

4. Every day.

[crim son]

10. I think that would be v. hard.

You probably think a little too much, not that you have a choice.

[graywarrior]

22. My mother told me that when I was 6.

[crim son]

25. Mothers know their daughters. n/t

[graywarrior]

29. She made me what I am.

[lizziegrace]

8. I'm the queen

I'm a stress driver. Too bad gas is so expensive and my car's so old. :(

I drove over 100 miles one evening last week. I felt I was going to come out of my skin if I didn't get out of the house.

:(

[crim son]

12. I think a lot of people do that... drive their stress away.

I try to go out and socialize. As soon as I start talking to other people I forget that I'm hurting.

[Lady Freedom]

9. NO!!!! That is a Repukes way to handle things!!

That is what Bushy is planing to do after the Repukes lose this Nov. ya know!!

[crim son]

14. I won't do it, Lady. I just really want to!

My kids are more important than my being perfectly comfortable in my world. I will NEVAH! act like a repuke!

[Gormy Cuss]

11. Wanting to run away is normal.

When one has gone through a lot of changes, bad times, financial or personal setbacks, et cetera it is natural to want to run away and start over. Usually the feeling passes once you have some clarity on a new direction to take or when you feel that you have some control over your life again. Running away usually doesn't solve anything.

Hang in there.

[crim son]

15. Hanging by the neck, as I've said before.

But still, hanging :P

[Deja Q]

13. No. Things WILL get better.

Otherwise I may as well not have gone to the ER back in July and find some railroad tracks to take a lengthy nap on.

For my life has exponentially more bad moments than good. But I don't let it rule me, despite all the moments I want it to. And on days it's damn easy to want it to.

[crim son]

16. I am familiar with those tracks.

It isn't the way. :hug:

[Haole Girl]

17. I hate that feeling

Luckily, I haven't had it in a long time. But, I truly, know, somewhat anyway, how you feel. I have tried to run away from my problems several times in my life.

Keep your chin up...I know that's a stupid cliche at times, but I always liked it when people told me that when I was feeling badly.

:hug:

[crim son]

18. There are times when I don't like to hear what I'm not

ready for. But when it's well-intended, I listen. So, thanks!

[datasuspect]

19. i've come to the conclusion that for some people

they can never have a home.

for whatever reason, i think there are certain types (like myself) who are destined to be alone (not lonely though) and this is a choice.

i like to think of it as a "child of the universe" thing.

or as epictetus would say: "you think that you have lost something? you have not. it has been restored."

[crim son]

24. Yes, that is exactly it.

It's like any home is an illusion I create, and when the illusion shifts the feeling of security is gone. People are the finest illusions, but they too always disappear. How you learn to accept and find strength in this, though, I have no idea.

[datasuspect]

26. you are your own home

there is no such thing as a soulmate, no other person can "complete" another person.

in the past few months, i've realized that (at least theoretically) if you can live between your own two ears, you can live anywhere.

the theory does however differ greatly from the practice.

[crim son]

30. Then I think my home is in serious need of maintenance.

No, seriously, I have been solitary almost all of my life. Even the relationship I've had with my husband was one of emotional distance. I thought I preferred it that way until something happened to me. Now I want something different. It's not necessarily a soulmate. Maybe it's just a regular intimate relationship. The kind where you can look into your partner's eyes and say with absolute truthfulness, "I love him/her."

[datasuspect]

33. i've thought about that too

have had that, but even a committed relationship is too much pressure. i will not allow myself to be controlled by another person in respect.

i even have a hard time answering questions. last g/f asked me lots of questions and would get pissed when i told her it was none of her business. tried to tell me what to do, control game shit.

[WCGreen]

20. I have become resigned to my fate and accept the limitations

that I and life have put upon myself...

Having said that, I guess I ran off to take a Creative Writing Class surrounded by a bunch f kids...

I also have found deep pleasure in finding out more about this crazy world of ours by trying to experience new things as often as I can...

[crim son]

27. I am not at "acceptance" yet. Not by a long shot.

But I agree that one key to happiness is to see, do, read, touch, learn... something new every day. When I don't do that, I know I'm completely off-balance. :hug:, WC! No, I shouldn't call you that, as it has it's own meaning in French.

[WCGreen]

32. The old saying that an unexamined life is not worth living...

I agree with that wholeheartedly...

But at different ages, an unexamined life means different things...

I feel I need to relearn, reexamine and experience the wonders that are all around me...

[crim son]

34. Not only that, but you can recognize in the faces

of those who have been afraid to look too closely or feel too deeply, their exhaustion, anger, fear. Has the creative writing been a very good thing for you?

[WCGreen]

35. I've been writing for a very long time but to capture the energy

from the kids in the class is really refreshing...

They are good but seem to lack the experience yet to truly get down their passion in words...

But yea, I am pumped....

[caty]

21. I get the strong feeling

sometimes that I would like to move to another country. Australia, New Zealand, Scotland, or England. One more republican president, and I might do it. I hate what our country has become.

[crim son]

28. Oh yeah. When I dwell on our political situation

the urge to leave is overwhelming. I keep saying that I'll leave if the draft is reinstated. I'm Canadian... it wouldn't be the worst thing to leave the U.S.

[HEyHEY]

23. I usually get it after posting in a thread.

[crim son]

31. Err... I recognize that emotion.

I should never drink and type. But dude, I'm female. I'm going to post about feelings that are distasteful to many men. Sorry about that :)