Dear friend lost her baby yesterday

[Robb]

...had been about 5 weeks pregnant. Good lord, I have no idea how to comfort her. What to say, what to do? Her game face was good, but that's got to break you up. :(

[xchrom]

1. sorry to hear that

i don't know her -- but if it helps tell there are people she doesn't know wishing her the best.
and yes -- i agree -- it must be very tough.

[Wetzelbill]

2. gosh, that's tough

not much that you can do other than be compassionate. Not sure what to say. So sad.

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

3. I would not know what to say

I would just give her a hug and tell her I am there anytime she needs to talk or if she needs ANYTHING I am there .

[ayeshahaqqiqa]

4. Just tell her

I love you. That's the best thing you can do.

[bearfan454]

5. God bless her and her family

[CO Liberal]

6. Just BE THERE For Her

IF she wants to talk, let her. If she wants to dry - let her. Support her in any way you can.

[UrbScotty]

7. Oh no.

All I can say is, be there for her. Support her as much as you can. I hope she appreciates it.

[deminflorida]

8. Sorry to hear this....

from me and my family our heart goes out to her, and God Bless.

[underseasurveyor]

9. Oh that's to bad.

We went through this a couple years ago. I was 6 weeks along when I miscarried.

I can't give advice for someone I don't know but I can tell ya for me it was something like this.......

If I say leave me alone, please do just that for a while. Don't ask me more questions at the moment. Nothing personal I assure you I just need my alone time and there were times when that feeling or need suddenly came from nowhere. Sometimes 15 minutes is all I need. I'll let you know if I want anything. But ask me occasionally just in case;-)

If you hear me crying through the door, let me cry uninterupted for a while. I need to do this. Then afterwhile just give me a hug. You don't have to say a word. Arms are comforting enough sometimes and words are not always neccesary. If I begin to cry in front of you, I just may need to borrow a shoulder for a minute or two if you don't mind. I'm sorry I got your shirt all wet and slobbery.

Remember dad too. Even though most men won't show vulnerable emotions on the outside they are also having a hard time. Little things like, making sure any pets are fed, taking out the garbage, make a casserole or some kind of easy to heat and eat meal. It helps alot.

Are there other children already? Get em out of the house for a few hours in the afternoon. Take em to a movie. Give mom some quiet, peaceful rest time.

If she needs personal feminine stuff from the store, let a girlfriend take care of it. Most guys are totally lost in this department.

I was in a great deal of pain and went to the hospital 3 times over 2 weeks for pain shots. Everyone's different and she may not have pain like I did but if she does, make sure she has someone to call incase she needs something now. I endured a long and painful afternoon. Couldn't get a hold of anyone for hours and I was in doubled-over agony. It was impossible for me to drive myself.

And don't be afraid to smile in front of me. Yes, I am sad and yes this hurts, but life has room for laughter and smiles even in the midst of our loss & sorrow.

Let your friend know she's in my thoughts.

[Booberdawg]

10. Just be willing to be there and LISTEN.

[Bush loves Jiang]

11. I'm sorry to hear that...

On the night of December 23rd, the same thing happened to a good friend of our family's.

[TNDemo]

12. What NOT to say.

You can always have another one.

This was God's will.

There was probably something wrong with it.


Speaking as one who has been there, the hormones are pretty bad for the first few days (like after having a baby) so things are extremely sensitive. Just listen.

[rasputin1952]

We had a miscarrage back in '86...

It was horrid, but MUCH worse for my wife of the time. It was caused by a difference in Rh factors, me being +, her -. Had that fixed with some meds, and went on to have a son in '88.

BE THERE for her. She will understand that things happen, but not why they happen. The genetic wiring of the female of the species is to bear children, and this a rough time for her.

My thoughts and prayers go out to her and her family and friends.

Just be there, she will let you know what she needs; usually an ear is what is needed most.

O8)

[rasputin1952]

13. We had a miscarrage back in '86...

It was horrid, but MUCH worse for my wife of the time. It was caused by a difference in Rh factors, me being +, her -. Had that fixed with some meds, and went on to have a son in '88.

BE THERE for her. She will understand that things happen, but not why they happen. The genetic wiring of the female of the species is to bear children, and this a rough time for her.

My thoughts and prayers go out to her and her family and friends.

Just be there, she will let you know what she needs; usually an ear is what is needed most.

O8)