I am a total jerk... Ask me anything...

[ElboRuum]

Yes, total. 100% The answers to your questions will bear this out.

[bridgit]

1. what did you do?

[ElboRuum]

11. I called my own mother a 'ho'. n/t

[bridgit]

14. would you call up my mom & tell her the same thing...

there's a cool 5 bucks in it for'ya B-)

[ElboRuum]

25. Woo... a fitsky... I'll get right on it... n/t

[bridgit]

26. that's the spirit...

:bounce: :thumbsup:

[Haole Girl]

2. Why are you a jerk?

:hi:

[ElboRuum]

13. Because someone had to be... n/t

[Floogeldy]

3. Is your name an anagram?

?

[ElboRuum]

16. Yes it is...

It's an anagram for "Spatula Spunkcookies". Thats what 'murbolue' means in the language I just made up.

[crim son]

19. By heaven,

I believe you are actually a jerk! Congratufuckulations!

[CaliforniaPeggy]

4. I don't believe it for a minute!

Convince me!

:hi:

[ElboRuum]

18. Why not? Is it not easy enough for you to imagine?

:shrug:

[CaliforniaPeggy]

28. Of COURSE I can imagine it!

But since I don't know you, well.......I'd like you to convince me...

That's all........:hi:

[ElboRuum]

30. I remain unconvinced of your interest in my jerkdom, n/t

[BarenakedLady]

5. I want to know

What chromosome malfunction makes men totally dicks? Just curious. :shrug:

[ElboRuum]

20. Whuh?

I wasn't particularly aware that men were totally dicks...

I would have to guess that it is chromosome 25, the -YAMA gene, which gives them the ability to tune out nagging.

[BarenakedLady]

24. Oh no you didn't!

If I could do a cyber three snap and a head roll you would totally get it. I'll give you three spanks instead.

:spank: :spank: :spank:

[crim son]

6. He isn't gonna answer.

He's a jerk, remember?

[CaliforniaPeggy]

7. My dear crim son!

I suspect you're right, sweetie! Good to see you tonight.....:hug:

[Floogeldy]

8. Ban the scaredy cat!!!!!!!!!

;)

[crim son]

15. And you, Peggy.

I'm trying to stay away from DU but every second day or so I find myself sucked back in. I hear you people, whispering to me, and I have to return and post something confessional so I can get all the hugs I need.

Look! Our jerk has in fact posted a response or two :)

[bridgit]

9. well he doesn't seem all that proficient at being one...

maybe just a 1/2 ass jerk :spray:

[BarenakedLady]

10. You nailed it!

You rock girlfriend!

:yourock:

[crim son]

12. Oh, it's true.

I totally rock! :rofl:

[BarenakedLady]

17. Oh yes you do.

And don't you ever forget it!:hug:

Or I'll kick your patootie!

:spank:

[crim son]

22. Damn that hurts.

But I deserve it :(

(Okay, now I'm kidding! Thanks, sweetie! :pals:)

[ElboRuum]

21. Well, shit, if you're gonna be that way about it... n/t

[crim son]

23. No, I admitted my error,

in my response to CalPeg. You ARE answering and you ARE a jerk! Cool :)

[NNadir]

27. I have a can of "Jerk Off" that claims to remove jerks stuck to my windows.

Does it work?

[ElboRuum]

29. No, but you feel relieved every time you use it, for some reason. n/t