The people you love. When they are gone, how long before the feeling subsides?

[Deja Q]

I may not always remember in the foreground, but those memories will always be there.

And when the event happens, it does take a while for those memories to go into the background.

Is this the same with you?

[mainegreen]

1. Never. You may think about it less but I dont think the feeling goes away.

:shrug:

[Nicole]

2. It's been over 30 years

I'll let you know when it happens.

[China_cat]

3. My mother's been gone 43 years.

Maybe someday it'll be better.

[QMPMom]

4. Never

My Uncle has been gone 40 years and I still miss him and think about him every day.

[Avalux]

5. It never goes away - 20 years ago my grandmother passed.

Certain smells remind me of her and make me sad, and when I hear the song Moon River, I break down in tears. Never goes away.

[Maccagirl]

6. The grief lessens, but you never stop missing them

My dad has been gone for 2 years, and I always think about what he'd say about events or decisions I've made, etc. if he were still here.

[Robb]

7. Takes a while, but it slips into the noise

...Sort of like if you stub your toe, then shoot yourself in the hand. You forget about the toe as additional pain enters.

OK, that's freakin' depressing. :)

[CaliforniaPeggy]

8. Ah, my dear Hypno......

It really takes a long time for the memories to go into the background...

You need to replace them with something else.......

And of course, that is not always possible, and that can lead you further into pain.

I'm sorry, baby......:hug:

[querelle]

9. Never

Pain diminishes over time but never completely goes away. This is actually a good thing because you should never forget the important people in your life. Just as long as the all encompassing grief doesn't last for years. That would be problematic.

Q

[begin_within]

10. Here's my advice...

Create as many happy memories with them as you possibly can while they are still with you. This will help you feel better later on. The worst feeling is feeling like you didn't spend enough time with them or loved them when you had the chance. If you spend as much time with them as you possibly can, and create good, pleasant happy memories, that will make it much better for you later on when they are gone. Don't leave any "unfinished business" or anything "left unsaid." Show them how much you love them. It's much better than just telling them you love them. Show them. The intense pain when you first lose them steadily diminishes, down to the point where it isn't really painful any more, but the "missing them" feeling can go on forever - depending on how big of a part of your life they were. In the long run, all you will be left with are the memories you have of them, so do what you can to make sure those are good memories.

[crim son]

11. I have dealt with the deaths of people I love by believing

that they are still with me. In the room I sleep, I have artifacts from the grandparents I've lost, and with whom I was close. I still hold these objects and talk to their former owners. It sounds odd but it makes me happy remembering them as they were, alive and smiling; and not as they are now, gone.

When the living pass in and out of my life it depends very much on the circumstances. But I have found that the pain subsides and the good memories are what remain. But it can take a long time. Years, for me, because I am a sentimental woman.

[Dem4truth]

12. I think the memories are always with you.

My Father died in 1985. Whenever new tech stuff comes out out I think how he would have enjoyed it. He spent a bunch of money in the early 80's to get us an Atari 1600.

The internet was not availiable to the public and I think everytime I log on. How much he would have loved this and learned and well I just wish he was around to see and live it.

[Zavulon]

13. 23 years since my grandfather passed.

When the feeling fades, I'll let you know.