12 hour self-imposed news blackout beginning at 5pm tonight

[LanternWaste]

I'm going to experience a self-imposed news blackout beginning as soon as I leave the office this evening. There's too much tension and mental strain associated with following the elections closer than my granddad followed the ponies.

Even the smallest election analysis or editorial would be a catalyst for my inner glutton to take over, and where would I be then? Sitting in front of the TV, furiously flipping channels with one hand while simultaneously typing in election-appropriate URLs.

Eyes getting more and more bloodshot until they eventually just bug out (although some people like the Billy Joel-look), blood pressure steadily increasing until I start bleeding from the ears, with the occasional synaptic overload thrown in to keep me off balance. I have to go through that everytime I call a girl for the first time to ask her out-- I know how bad it gets.

So, no news, cable, or internet. Phone gets unplugged (read: "turned-off" if you're in the under-30 crowd) to prevent family and friends from calling and ruining my island of tranquility.

So what will I do? I've thought about it and here's the plan-- leave the voting booth and drive directly to my apartment, cook up some kind of chicken and pasta dish, throw in three, completely non-relevant and pre-selected movies (Princess Bride, Jaws, and Dark City). I'll crack open a bottle of wine and eat a handful of Tylenol PM, and settle in for a quiet, uninformative evening.

Tomorrow? "Aye, there's the rub." I'm hoping for the best and expecting little less than that. I'll check DU with my first cup of coffee as soon as I get up to get a good grip on the election outcomes before I'm fully awake. That should give me twenty minutes or so on the way to work to steel myself regardless of the outcome.

I've passed out flyers at my apt. complex over the past week. I've urged all of my co-workers to vote, worked a phone bank this past weekend and will be voting as soon as I leave the office. In effect, I've done all I intended to and feel rather spent now.

Here's my official prediction: We pick up 4 seats in the Senate (shy of a majority) and 23 seats in the House (let the oversight begin!). Regardless of what happens tonight though, I want to say thank you to most every DU'er here (there are a few who are just plain mean and combative and although they don't have my thanks, they have my fondest wishes). You guys have been a real pick-me-up over the past six years. I've become more informed on a host of issues I'd never previously cared about. I've laughed a LOT at some of the posts (and posters) in the Lounge and even picked up a crush or two along the way.

Whatever happens tonight, I'll be here tomorrow. And the day after that, and the day after that...

Good luck and God speed, DU!