WARNING: Today is day 45

[flvegan]

As in, that's how many more shopping days there are until Christmas.

What with the escalation of this years "War on Christmas" and the further devolvement into heathenesque practices (well, the Dems HAVE emboldened the terra-ists now), I'm leaving right now to go stand in front of WalMart so that I can be top-dead-center A Number 1, first jackass in line for the big "Day After Thanksgiving Day" sale. I'm gettin' me a deeply discounted HD tv, and I don't care how many toddlers I have to trample to git 'r done.

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

1. Modern television screens are made with baby deers' retinas.

Much more light-sensitive than phosphorus.

[kick-ass-bob]

2. I've already started sharpening my elbows.

}(

[reyd reid reed]

3. One of these days

I'm gonna stop reading your posts if they've got numbers in the title. You're fuckin' with my denial.

:banghead::banghead::banghead:

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

4. Trample a toddler for me.

Let's git 'r done.

[LeftyMom]

5. Make sure to call me at work every 15 minutes to see if we have TMX Elmo yet. Everybody else does.

When we get some I'm going to buy one and burn it in the parking lot in front of customers. :grr:

[billyskank]

6. LeftyMom

Do you have TMX Elmo yet?

:hi:

[kick-ass-bob]

7. That thing is fucking funny.

You should get one.

:D

[flvegan]

8. Is that TMX as in "Tickle Me X-Treme?" Does he do piledrivers through burning tables?

Barbed wire matches with Oscar the Grouch?

E-C-Dub! E-C-Dub!

[LeftyMom]

19. When I get one (and for $39.99, the theraputic value is a bargain) he does all of that ON FIRE.

:evilgrin:

[LaraMN]

9. You people are so far behind on the agenda.

You're supposed to have wrapped up your plans for our war on Christmas, by now.
I'm already strategizing for the war on Easter.

I guess I'm just a better liberal than the rest of you.

*hair toss* *eyeroll* *melodramatic sigh*

:D

[BarenakedLady]

10. Great........

Like I couldn't get any more fucking depressed.

:banghead:

[LSK]

11. its also the temperature

:scared:

[Guava Jelly]

12. bah!!!! humbug

I am officially at war with christmas!

[flvegan]

13. You need to fight Christmas over there, so you don't have to...oh, nevermind.

[Guava Jelly]

14. I'm nuking the north poll

Eat yellow cake FAT MAN!!!! Not so jolly now are we st Nickey :rofl:

[flvegan]

15. "Allow me to enrich you...with plutonium!"

It sounds better with an Ah-nold-esque accent...

[BarenakedLady]

16. Where do I enlist?

and are there uniforms?

[Guava Jelly]

17. only your birthday suit :o)

:evilgrin:

[MrScorpio]

18. Wait a sec, I thought I cancelled Christmas?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_mesg&forum=105&topic_id=4484104&mesg_id=4484104

[RevolutionaryActs]

20. Um, ew

:puke: