How do you respond to "You're short?"

[raccoon]

I used to get that a lot, or some genius variant of it. Now that I'm knocking at the gates of little old ladyhood, I don't hear it.

But talk about stating the obvious....geez louise.

[Burma Jones]

1. Well, I'm over six feet tall, so if someone tells me that

I usually pull out my wallet......

[MissMillie]

2. "It runs in my family....

.... like I imagine tact does in yours."

[seemunkee]

6. I like that

I'll pass it on to my 4'11" wife.

[ScreamingMeemie]

3. Oh, don't get me started...

My daughter was big for her age. Not heavy, just always taller than your typical 1,2,3,4 and so on year old....

People would come out with,"Wow! She's a Moose!" and I had to restrain myself from slapping them.

[youthere]

4. My niece was always big like that..

(now she's grown obese as well, but that's another story) Even when she was in kindergarten she stood at least 6-8 inches taller than the other kids. When we'd go into stores people (usually store clerks) would say "My god she's huge!" finally my SIL would say "My god so is your mouth!"

[Orsino]

5. "You've got sharp eyes." n/t

[ohiosmith]

7. "And you're ugly. I could have a growth spurt, you will never have a beauty spurt."

[democracyindanger]

8. "And your fly's open."

[johnnie]

9. I have been hearing that my whole life

On the first day of kindergarten my mother had my older sister (1st grade) walk me to school. She ran ahead of me because she didn't want to be with her brother. I got stopped at the traffic light and the woman wouldn't let me cross because she didn't think I was big enough to be going to school. My sister had to come get me..lol. That was the beginning.

I have heard them all. To be honest with you, it never bothered me that much because I was a little punk who just knew that I was better than the assholes calling me names anyway. The only time it really bothered me was when I would hear the same joke for the hundredth time. I mean, handball against the curb? WTF?

My father really influenced me to not give a shit what people say and I was already that way before I even started school. But, I always was first in line, I got out of doing a lot of shit because I couldn't reach, I would get lost in a large group of people so I could get away with a lot more and there were a lot of other pluses to being short.

I guess my answer to you would be, "no shit". That's about all I can say when someone tells me I'm short. Even at the age of 42 I still get it. I had one heavy-set guy here at work a few years ago keep saying shit and making fun. One day he put a step stool by one of the book cases and said "Here Johnnie, now you can reach the top shelf". I said, "If you laid on your back I could step on your gut and reach even higher". He didn't like that.


It's funny that people can get away with making fun of short people and not some other people who have some sort of control over what makes them stand out. I mean, what the fuck was I supposed to do, stretch my bones? lol

Being a woman, you should be happy to be short. A lot of men dig that. Being a shorter male now, that's a different ballgame. All the tall men take up the short women and leave me with slim pickins. :)

I really don't mind being how tall I am. To be completely honest, I would rather be shorter than average than taller than average. Tall people to me look like morons in a crowd of people..lol.

[The Wielding Truth]

12. You are taller in character than most, and you are a Democrat!

How much better does it get? Go,johnie,go!

[johnnie]

13. Thanks

:)

I've always walked tall.

[Patiod]

15. Short women take up all the tall men - leave me w/slim pickins

As a tall woman, I have the same gripe ! And you're right - men of all sizes prefer short women. Maybe it's some caveman thing that they won't have to feed them as much.

As for standing out in a crowd, it's probably why I prefer Minneapolis (where there are more tall people in the crowd) to Los Angeles (where I walked into a bathroom last week to find three women under 4'10", all with Mayan faces, all looking at me like I was Godzilla) I don't feel like a moron in a crowd of short people, but I do feel like Gulliver. I don't speak any Spanish, but certainly understood who they were talking about when I kept hearing "gringa grande" as I walked through Nogales with my short friend who speaks Spanish, and who kept cracking up.

Most adults won't comment about my height (fear? tact? jealousy? pity?) but kids do, which I think is hilarious. "Mommy, that woman is a GIANT" or "why is that lady so TALL?" The mothers get really embarrassed, but to me it's funny.

[johnnie]

26. Sorry, I guess "moron" wasn't the right word

The vision that comes to mind is seeing a very tall skinny guy in a crowd of people and how goofy he looks.

[Patiod]

33. No worries - I'm the Cyrano de Bergerac of tall

Tall jokes slide right off my back!

Was in a bar once, and this little yuppie guy in yellow suspenders came over to me (after alerting his friends) and asked in a loud voice: "Hey, you're pretty tall for a girl - are you a basketball player?" and I came back with "No, why? Are you a jockey?". His friends were rolling on the floor! (had he asked me that in private as an obvious pick-up line, I probably would have rolled my eyes but chatted with him - instead he was CLEARLY showing off his put-down skills for his buddies)

In a place called the "Amazon Club", two little South Philly dweebs walked by, and said (loudly) "yo, that must be one of the Amazons" and I came right back with "And let my guess - you two are Pygmies?" (okay, it's not geographically correct, so sue me)

I'm not usually fast on my feet, but don't even THINK about heckling me about my height!!!

[rockymountaindem]

16. Sounds like you and I are in the same spot

Mind if I ask how tall you are?

[johnnie]

25. 5'5"

Although maybe I am shrinking..lol. I honestly don't know exactly.

[raccoon]

20. Great response to your co-worker!

Sounds like you have a great attitude.

I never dated tall men much. Most of my boyfriends were short or medium height.

Being short doesn't bother me now, though it did when I was younger. One good thing about getting older, IMO, is that lot of things that used to bother you, don't any more.

[johnnie]

27. Well, like I said... it never really did bother me...

So as I get older it feels the same. Of course I don't hear it as much these days but it still happens. One joke that gets pulled on me a lot is when I am playing a gig and someone in the band or a friend will set my mic up pushed all the way down..LOL.

But even as a child I would poke fun in a way at myself. Like if the teacher would say "Get in line, shortest to tallest" I would say something like "Umm excuse me people, no need to get up until I get in place". And then pretend to take my time. Just stupid things, but I think a lot of people didn't make fun because they knew I wouldn't give a shit.

[NewWaveChick1981]

10. "And that affects you....how????"

:) I'm 5 ft. 4.5 inches tall, which is pretty average but kind of short. I say that with a smile on my face, but it's nobody else's business how tall, short, etc., I am. It's rude to make comments about people's appearance unless they are positive. Would they walk up to a fat person and say, "Damn, you're really fat!!!" ??? :grr: Do they not realize that the people involved ALREADY KNOW??? :eyes: Yeesh....

[Mz Pip]

11. How about

"Your observations of the obvious are astounding."

Mz Pip
:dem:

[azmouse]

14. I kick the idiot who said it in the ankle!

That'll learn 'em.

[meegbear]

17. Thanks ... you're ugly.

[peekaloo]

18. The cut-off for genius is 5'4".

:-)

[BikeWriter]

19. Tell them they're ugly and you have high heels.

[SteppingRazor]

21. I'm 6'2", so if someone calls me short...

chances are I'll just nod and say, "Yes, Mr. O'Neil. Great game last night. Please don't hurt me." ;)

[redqueen]

22. "yup"

that about covers it

[Flaxbee]

23. how about a simple "you're kidding!"

always can add on, "now, when the hell did that happen? I was 6'2" yesterday!" Then turn and run screaming out of the room.

Lol.

At 5'7", I'm one of the shorter females in my family (of 6 girls) so I'd get a fair amount of crap from family members, but not the general public...

[amitten]

24. I say, "Yes, I am. I am also brunette." n/t

[grace0418]

28. "You're perceptive!"

Or "And you're rude. Nice knowing you."

[hedgehog]

29. I know, now give me the (whatever I needed down off a high shelf.)

My kids are all taller than me (I'm 5 ft 1 3/4") but I still refer to them as little as in little (insert name here).

Since one son is pushing 6ft, it gets kind of silly.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

30. "Yeah so? I could still kick your ass."

I'm a fiery little Mick.

[gkhouston]

31. "Out of my way, hulking peasant"? n/t

[Patiod]

35. My SO is a large weightlifter, and one friend said:

"You're what the Romans saw coming over the hills a few thousand years ago...."

Another friend said "in another lifetime, you would be the guy who stopped by the house to threaten the peasants if they were a few shekels short on the ox payment."

He actually doesn't mind the hulking peasant jokes!

[Lowell]

32. I just shrug it off

or tell them they are rude.

I never thought to much about my height. But I remember a couple times when it came up in a funny kind of way. A couple years ago I went to a reunion of one of my old army units. Several of they guys there remembered me as their platoon sergeant, but they all said they thought I was a lot bigger. I got a laugh out of that, you don't have to be a giant to be intimidating.

Recently I was at a biker function where one of the people who regularly reads my website came into the room at a function I'd set up at the American Legion. He walked right past me and started asking everyone where is Lowell? They pointed my way and the guys chin dropped. He came over, stuck out his hand and said, "I thought you were some huge biker guy with long hair." I just grinned. I'm short, bald and don't give a rat's ass.

[Rabrrrrrr]

34. "And you are an unmannered jackass. Anything else we should point

out about each other? Or is it time to act like adults now?"

[liontamer]

36. "tall people are a blight on the earth's resources" n/t

[bertha katzenengel]

37. *gasp* This sounds like a job for Obviousman!

Bummer. :hi:

[av8rdave]

38. I just say "I'm 6 feet tall - only short in the NBA"

[RevolutionaryActs]

39. Kick 'em in the shins?

:shrug:

[ForrestGump]

40. I get "you're too tall to be Elvis" all the time (he was 6' and I'm 6' 5")

If they're nice people, they get "I'm larger than life."

If they're just kinda there they might get "thank you," "how interesting," "I appreciate that," or some essentially dismissive answer (or silence -- we get stupid stuff and non sequiturs all day long and they long ago lost their novelty)

If they're obnoxious f***wits, or people spoiling for a fight (often my job resembles the plot of an Elvis movie, with a fight brewing at least once a shift...mostly in the summer, when the detritivores of America seem to join the flow of tourists here), they might get -- unless I wisely take the high road and just totally ignore the f***ers, as I usually do -- something like "and you're too ugly to be walking around in public, <mumbled> motherf***er," or something similarly disparaging. :D