Fun things from Six Sigma training!

[PVnRT]

DID YOU KNOW...

That managers are considered a non-value-added resource?

That meetings are considered completely unproductive?

Managers and meetings are worthless! And now I have math to prove it!

[RumpusCat]

1. Six Sigma is why I quit my job at Giant Corporation X

That has got to be the STUPIDEST crap I have ever heard and it implanted in me a fierce and burning determination to never, ever, ever go to business school.

[wildhorses]

2. yeah, i knew all that

worthless and BORING, too--

i am so NOT corporate material:P

[CabalPowered]

3. God I hate that crap

My esteemed brother swears up and down that it's the best thing since sliced bread. Bullshit. Looks like a bunch of corporate mumbo jumbo that just angers people.

[Burma Jones]

4. Hasn't this been replaced by something else yet?

like,

Total Excellence Awareness Theory Symbiosis (TEATS)

[pdx_prog]

5. Going for your black belt?

Going the Lean Six pathway grasshopper?

[Tyler Durden]

7. Save your way to PROFITS!

Like cutting costs to profitability, or legislating morality.

Yeah. THAT'LL work.

[Tyler Durden]

6. My name is Tyler, and I'm a Black Belt (Keep comin' back)

GAWD I so much wish I hadn't moved into this department. The raise and the shorter drive are not worth it.

The common perception of six sigma is that you cut off your Green/Black Belt's Left arm (or Right if he/she is left handed), install a crank, turn said crank, and money will now flow copiously out of their ass.

If this does not occur, KILL said person, and switch in another until you have success; such as NEVER.

[madrchsod]

9. ohhh... i`m impressed.....not

i`ve seen this bullshit come and go over the years. nothing ever changes unless those above wish to share with those below...in this country? ya right

[wilt the stilt]

8. Jack Welch championed it

which says it all. total bullshit. It turned Home depot from one of the best companies to work for a mass cauldron of hate and backstabbing.

[conscious evolution]

10. I have a friend who teaches Six Sigma

He said it increases profits dramaticly for the school.
He also got laugh when I told him it sounds like the SWAG method on steroids.