Encounter with Customs and Immigration - what's your opinion?

[sbj405]

Yesterday, SO and I were returning to the States and had to clear customs and immigration in San Juan. We stepped up together with one customs form (it states one per family) as we have many times before. The conversation went like this . .

Officer: What's your relationship?
Me: (taken aback a bit) Domestic partners
officer: How long have you been domestic partners?
Me: (fighting back the urge to say none of your fucking business) 3 years
SO: That's a rather odd question.
Officer: I have to know, so I know whether you live together and need two forms. (Hmm, why didn't he ask Do you reside at the same address?)
Officer: (Stamps our passports) You know after 2 years, it considered marriage.
SO: Not in MD (MD has no common law marriage. Actually, PR doesn't either - so :wtf: )
Officer: Are you sure? You better check.

I was so pissed. I just grabbed my passport and left. :mad:

So, what's take on this situation?

My SO thought that I was overreacting and that it wasn't a big deal. I say it's none of their f'ing business that nature of my relationship and I don't need a god damned lecture from some agent barely old enough to shave (let alone carry a gun) about it. Perhaps, he should have foccused his questions on issues relevant to customs or moved us through since the line was 30 deep. It also occurred to me that the only reason he had to question us was that my last name was different. He must ask that question a lot since most people I know don't change their names. Oh and I can only imagine what he would have said were we a same sex couple.

[sbj405]

1. Kick for the evening crowd.

[mainegreen]

2. Their job is to try and piss you off, get you to slip up.

Personally, that's a mild encounter with them. Once coming through they dragged me off, showed me my luggage and demanded I give up where I was hiding the drugs. No amount of assuring them that they were clearly morons would convince them I was not flying with drugs. They had my luggage and proceeded to tear it apart in front of me, throwing stuff everywhere, the whole time assuring me they would find the drugs. Half an hour later, my clothes all over the floor, the non-existent drugs not found, they told me I had five minutes to get my luggage back together and leave the room as they needed it for the next poor bastard. I pretty much told them to go fuck themselves, and it would take however long it would take to fold all my clothes and get them back in the luggage and that if they were in a hurry, they could help me fold the clothes. Needless to say they weren't in *that* much of a hurry. By the time I got to the train station I had literally 30 seconds before my train left. That was fun.

Ever since then, I've coated one pocket of my carry-on backpack in jam and dirt, so that when these bastards give me trouble, they'll end up with jammy, dirty hands. As they *always* start searching with the backpack it's a good deterrent. The theory was that they would be reluctant to search anything else after finding that surprise. My theory was correct and I've jammed two of the bastards so far.

You got off easy!

[Gormy Cuss]

3. I have a friend who gets that sort of questioning at immigration

She's married, but surname is different from her spouse. Every time she re-enters the U.S. she's asked questions about her relationship to him, where she was born, where she graduated from high school, etc. Her spouse never does, and here's the kicker. The spouse has one of those unusual 'foreign-sounding' names and is a naturalized citizen while she has a name as common Smith and was born in the U.S.

[Haole Girl]

4. It's usually not a good idea to argue with a customs official...

..or anybody in uniform who can possibly prevent you from returning to the comfort of your own home. (that's been my experience....learned the hard way, I might add). ;-)

[trof]

6. Yeah, what she said. I would have been pissed,

but probably gritted my teeth.
I was an airline pilot and have traveled all over the world.
With the exception of Saudi Arabia, I was treated far better, with more courtesy and just basic human respect, everywhere else than back home in the good ol' USA.
:grr:

[nini]

5. I've always heard they ask questions quickly to see if you hesistate

when answering. It helps them determine if you're really who you are etc.

I've had them ask me stuff that didn't make much sense really - where do you work? what city is that in? etc. It's things you will know off the top of your head and can easily ansswer if you're on the up and up.

I wouldn't get too upset about it - it's not that unusual from my experiences coming back in the country.