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What I learned in a Fundie Junior High

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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:09 PM
Original message
What I learned in a Fundie Junior High
Hmmmm lemme see if I can remember everything

1 - The bible is the literal word of God. Even when he refers to himself in the 3rd person.
2 - Evolution can't be proved, but Scientists have already proved that God exists.
3 - Genesis is a much better Science textbook than anything out there on the market
4 - If you are unfarily accused, defending yourself is "back talk" and deserves more punishment
5 - Hitting kids, especially small ones, is good for their character
6 - Pants on a girl is obscene. Somehow skirts that can be looked up with well placed mirrors on shoes isn't.
7 - Athiests are demon posessed.
8 - There is no such thing as mental illness - just demon posession
9 - Jesus is two steps behind your every hour of every day, watching everything you do.
10 - This means he loves you
11 - No not in THAT way!
12 - The way a parent should show their kid love is by beating them mercilessly
13 - Reagan was a God-Fearing Christian Saint who should be on Mount Rushmore
14 - Carter (this was the 80's) was a liar, an athiest and a communist
15 - Rock music has its roots in devil worship
16 - Christian Rock is OK, as long as you don't dance to it
17 - Catholics are going to hell, but that's no reason we can't use them for political gains
18 - Mormons, same story
19 - Everything happens for a reason. When you suffer, it's either God testing you or punishment for sin. If good things happen to you, it's either a test or a reward.
20 - Heaven is made up of people singing Halelujah all day long. And how great God is. Doesn't that sound FUN????
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Der Blaue Engel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:15 PM
Response to Original message
1. Wow! I had no idea we'd gone to the same jr. high!
Except for the part about pants. They let us have those.
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:17 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. Really? You were lucky I guess
Funny how some of the biggest athiests I know were schooled in fundie schools. Also the hardest parties - as well as the most brainless sheep :)

Here's to recovery! :toast:
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Der Blaue Engel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:27 PM
Response to Reply #2
5. I'll drink to that
:toast:
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:28 PM
Response to Reply #5
6. I still have nightmares of Fundie Hell
Edited on Wed Jan-24-07 05:29 PM by Taverner
They got me started on those nightmares when I was 6

Richard Dawkins said that exposing young Children to religion is a form of child abuse. I tend to agree.
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Der Blaue Engel Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:33 PM
Response to Reply #6
8. It is child abuse, I agree
Having been subjected to "A Thief in the Night" when I was 7, and a film of "partial-birth abortions" when I was 13, I have a lot of PTSD.
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:36 PM
Response to Reply #8
10. My favorite was a tract called "My Heart Christ's Home"
In it, a nosy Jesus goes around brainwashing the author's mind so that it's clean like a good Christian's should be.

If I were to show my kids Hostel, other parents would criticize me non stop.

But If I read the story of the resurrection, I'd be a "Good Christian Parent"

Jeez :eyes:
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jakefrep Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:21 PM
Response to Original message
3. 21. God was kicked out of the public schools
22. The ACLU is out to get Christians
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:23 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. OH YEAH FORGOT THOSE!!!
Edited on Wed Jan-24-07 05:24 PM by Taverner
God was kicked out of the US Government too!

Even though the pledge says "under God" and our currency has "In God We Trust" they are just paying lip service.

We also had a Christian Pledge of Allegiance to the Christian Flag

Scary shit man!

ON edit: almost forgot, women are to SERVE their husbands. They are to be subservient in all ways.
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ghostsofgiants Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:31 PM
Response to Original message
7. What you didn't learn in Fundie Junior High...
Edited on Wed Jan-24-07 05:31 PM by primate1
How to spell atheist. :P
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SoyCat Donating Member (660 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:36 PM
Response to Original message
9. Atheist here...I'll never forget the 12 weeks I spent in a fundie school. *It was Hell*
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:37 PM
Response to Reply #9
11. Why did you have to do it?
Edited on Wed Jan-24-07 05:40 PM by Taverner
I feel for ya man.

My journey to reason has been a long one.

I've slowly evolved from Fundie to Totally Reason based. I wouldn't say Athiest, because I don't rule out a prime mover - but I know the Bible is TOTAL BS.

Funny story - I can say I was "saved" from fundamentalism by Van Halen and Black Sabbath. They had a "exposing the satanic side of rock" sermon and they played all these great tunes by The Eagles and Led Zeppelin, and instead of making me fear for my soul, I went out and bought all the albums they played!
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SoyCat Donating Member (660 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 06:40 PM
Response to Reply #11
20. A public school teacher told a blatant lie about me and the principal sided with her. That was to
be expected because he was having an affair with her! Anyway, it was too late in the year for any *good* private schools to accept any new students. I wasn't kicked out; it was a totally different kind of situation. The rest is history.

I've always detested religion and that made my time in Fundie hell even more exasperating. I did have fun shaking things up a bit while I was there. They probably still remember me...
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evlbstrd Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:40 PM
Response to Original message
12. Heaven
Heaven is a place
A place where nothing
Nothing ever happens.

David Byrne had it right.
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:48 PM
Response to Reply #12
15. Love that song
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evlbstrd Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:52 PM
Response to Reply #15
16. Me too.
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ceile Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:40 PM
Response to Original message
13. Sounds familiar.
But it was my dad's military style church instead. My parents had joint custody, so every other Sunday I was subjected to "Carter is evil for not letting me go to the Olympics in Russia" (my SS teacher ran track) and "Catholics are going to hell because they don't pray directly to God. Instead they go through Mary-a WOMAN!". I was baptized Catholic. Ah, good times, good times....
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Taverner Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:48 PM
Response to Reply #13
14. Rough...
I remember lots of military and cops kids (my dad was a cop) at the school.

Freethinking was discouraged, to say the least.
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conscious evolution Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 05:53 PM
Response to Original message
17. What I learned in a fundie school in 7th grade
Never,ever do a report on evolution for science class.
The teacher loved and gave me an A+.I think he had been forbidden from teaching it.
The other students were another thing entirely.They went apeshit crazy on me.They would start fights that I would finish.Do you think they ever got in trouble?No.I was the one who caught shit for fighting from the school.
FUCK ALL FUNDIES!!
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jberryhill Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 06:00 PM
Response to Original message
18. Martin Luther King


was "a communist and a womanizer".

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Arugula Latte Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 06:25 PM
Response to Original message
19. I think we should classify all fundies as mentally ill.
You'd have to have a serious brain imbalance to buy into this magical thinking.
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Sequoia Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 06:51 PM
Response to Original message
21. Sex before marriage is a sin.
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NewWaveChick1981 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Jan-24-07 07:06 PM
Response to Original message
22. Makes me glad I went to public schools...
:rofl: :hi: That sounds like hell on earth.... :yoiks:
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