Dude, how cool is this?!

[MonkeyFunk]

I was walking my pet weasel, and I went past this house. In the top window, I saw this kid.

I mean, who the fuck lets a kid be seen from a window?

So I climbed the ivy, leaped over to the chimney, jumped to the sill and cracked the window open with my thick skull.

I crawled in and grabbed the kid. Scurried back down the chimney/ivy and named him "Bill".

Any busy-body crapknob who tries to stop me will get a big fist-full of me. Smoothie!

[datasuspect]

1. my monkey has a genetic committment

to chasing your weasel. mulberry bushes bring out the worst in him.

[MonkeyFunk]

2. Your monkey can

sock my kick.

[jpgray]

3. Get rid of that kid if it pees too much on the furniture.

[ChavezSpeakstheTruth]

4. or throws it's feces

[MonkeyFunk]

5. hrmmm

how much is too much? :shrug:

[ronnykmarshall]

9. or wants to be taken out to a RESTURANT!

[MonkeyFunk]

10. Update on little Billy

turns out the little bastard wants food, and he doesn't think screwdrivers fit the bill.

So I let him out... hopefully he'll go feral and the neighbors will put food out. Whiny punk.

[ronnykmarshall]

11. I hope there aren't song birds around.

[MonkeyFunk]

12. I'm not worried

just between you, me and the dog, the kid was a little slow. Took him FOREVER to do my taxes and his car-washing skills were spotty, to say the least.

[ronnykmarshall]

13. Go thing you let him loose.

The worst thing about finding a stray kid is when they can't do shit around the house.

Go to all the trouble of liberating one and they turn out like this.

[MonkeyFunk]

14. no kidding

I do and I do and I do, and what do I get in return? An audit and windshield spots.

[ronnykmarshall]

15. Looks like the little fucker is stealing things.

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=105x6326564

[MonkeyFunk]

16. Sigh...

that's my fault. When he wouldn't shut up, I fed him some indoor/outdoor carpeting.

But like a good dad, I made him "stay" for 20 seconds first.

[ronnykmarshall]

17. Did he cry?

[MonkeyFunk]

18. Of course not...

you think I'm some kind of abuser?

Back that shit up, poster!

[ronnykmarshall]

19. You just want to dominate

.... I'm getting turned on!

[asthmaticeog]

6. Are you gonna train him yourself?

[MonkeyFunk]

7. egads, no

that's best left to the professionals.

[asthmaticeog]

8. I guess that's probably the most sensible thing.