APB for San Diego (and Tijauana)DU'ers - runaway teen

[haele]

My stepdaughter, who is a seriously bi-polar 15 year old decided not to take her meds for over 3 nights, had a psychotic episode - broke her bedroom window, tossed a bunch of things around, cursed, screamed and swore at us and then flounced out last night at around 9pm wearing only a white camisole, black shorts, and socks, claiming she was going to "stay with friends for the rest of her life" because we were stupid and lazy and hated her.
We were stupid and hated her apparently because we weren't going to put up with verbal abuse heaped on us because we didn't wake her up in enough time to go to the library - even though we spent all afternoon in urgent care because her dad had a broken foot and she refused to get up and come with us for that - and (horrors) went into her room to get some trash, leftover food, and dirty dishes out of her room while she slept before she ground them into her carpet. Oh, and didn't read her mind enough to know what she wanted me to buy for her fast food dinner at 8:30, even though I had already made dinner (a chicken-cornbread "pie" that she had mentioned she wanted earlier in the week) two hours prior.

That was close on 16 hours ago.

I've called all the numbers on our caller ID for the last month that I haven't personally identified, looked on her my space, contacted all her friends - some of whom are out looking in popular hangout places or in the canyons for her - and put in a police report. Because she is diagnosed bipolar and a possible danger to herself and others while in a psychotic manic state, the police are taking this pretty seriously, and have already called us several times informing us which runaway or teen crisis centers they have contacted to be on lookout. She knows several kids already in halfway houses in the area, so there's a possibility she may have tried to con her way into one of those places with some story of abuse or other nonsense.

I'm pretty sure she's with one of her secretive emo kids of overworked or druggie parents type friends rather than one of her healthier school friends, because she likes to befriend kids who have problems and neglectful parents - and of course, those are "her" friends that we don't have to know about, right?

Anyway, more eyes and minds are helpful, so if anyone can think of anything else, please post. Laz is a wreck, and there's nothing he can do right now - he can barely stand, let alone walk right now.

Here's Cassie - I'm sorry if I didn't downsize them enough.





Haele

[bicentennial_baby]

1. I'm on the East Coast, but...

:kick:

and :hug: :hug: :hug:

[haele]

2. Kick

It's now a hurry up and wait game.

Haele

[Maineiac]

3. I'm an East Coaster, but my prayers are with you

All of us are here for you if you need us.

[haele]

4. I'm more worried for Laz -

She's his only surviving child. He lost a son to SIDS 17 years ago. He's having a very hard time right now. I can hold out until resolution, one way or any other.

Haele

[haele]

5. Delete - double post

N/T

[BelleCarolinaPeridot]

6. Kicking ...

I am so sorry :hug:

[Haole Girl]

7. Wow

Good luck with everything. Hugs for all of you. I hope you find her soon, and can somehow work it out. :hug: :hug: :hug:

[haele]

8. Kick for the evening crew

Still no word. Several of her friends who have been playing phone tree with us are calling up in tears wondering if there is any word.

Flyers are going up tomorrow when I can get to a color printer.

Haele

[KitchenWitch]

9. I am in Orange County - would she come north?

I will be on the lookout for her.

[haele]

10. No, she's not originally from California -

She's vaguely aware that there's something north of us, but if it's past Miramar (or La Jolla or Poway), she'd have no clue or comfort zone. She's got a very low threshold for any sort of stress. She does have quite a few friends with family in TJ tho - she may have hi-tailed it down there with a friend's cousin - we've gotten ahold of one or two of them, and they're starting up a phone tree situation just in case.

I don't think she went far enough to get to that point though - even pissed, without shoes and minimally dressed in the late evening, she shouldn't have gotten too far - certainly not far enough to the areas where she might be picked up by someone looking for a girl for the night. I'd be surprised if she's more than 10 blocks any direction from St. Augustine's High School, (which we live near) and was last seen walking westward around the school at around 9PM last night. She had no money, so a bus (major street in that direction) is pretty much out of the question, and the only people in that vicinity who might give her bus fare - or a quarter + for a pay phone - instead of calling the cops the way she was looking hadn't seen her.

Hopefully, it's just a mixture of guilt and spite that's keeping her where she is.

Haele

[KitchenWitch]

11. I wish there were more I could do.

:hug:

I hope she comes home soon.

[haele]

12. Can someone repost this in the California Forum?

I lost my star and can't post down there anymore. :(

Haele

[Danger Mouse]

14. I'm on the East Coast, but I can do at least that for you.

Best of luck :hug:

[Danger Mouse]

15. I posted it in that forum for you.

Hope it helps raise some awareness. Let us know how it all turns out.

[bicentennial_baby]

16. Done

:hug:

[Starbucks Anarchist]

13. Kick.

[haele]

17. Kick for night crew -

We got a call, one of the detectives from Juvie will be picking up the case at 8am tomorrow - since she's a runaway rather than a potential abductee, no Amber Alert unless he can't find anything from phone records and MySpace contacts.
One of her friends who has access to her computer here has broadcast an email to all her "friends" telling them that we are looking for her and it's serious, she's sick.

I went through her room to clear a space for the repair crew after her fit and found she was hiding her lithium since Wednesday/Thursday - probably because she "wanted to stay up and study" for her CSAT test Friday morning (mistaking the Lithium for her previous bipolar medication, which would put her to sleep), and hadn't taken it on Friday because she fell asleep before 8pm when she normally is reminded to take it. One day usually won't be a problem, but she's supposed to be taking enough that a 2 or 3 day withdrawl can trigger psychosis; the sudden, full fledged return of the mania the drug was controlling - which apparently is what had happened.

She's got a drama group that pays the students that attend on Monday - I'm hoping that greed will flush her out from whatever hole she's hiding out of - especially since the director knows what she did.

It's going to be a long night. Laz can't handle losing another child, especially this way.

Haele

[SammyWinstonJack]

18. K&R

:hug:

[haele]

19. Kidlet home, friends convinced her to return -

We're trying to gently sort things out now.
If she remains calm, we'll bring her to the hospital for evaluation tomorrow, but if she looks like she's going to bolt, we'll take her in tonight.

Thanks for all your well-wishings.

Haele

[Kali]

20. good luck, glad she got back

[Haole Girl]

21. Thank you for the update

So glad she is safe! :hug:

[Bunny]

22. Thank god!

Best wishes for a happy resolution. :hug: for you and Laz.

[haele]

23. Update - we're talking to her doctor today about evaluations -

He indicated when this first happened that we should re-set her baseline to see if there's something else developing - she still thinks she didn't do anything unusual, has no clue why we were worried and has spoken casually about "Next time".
I don't think she knows that chances are, her real friends at her old school won't allow a "next time" - especially since the uproar - we've had close to twenty-five different kids call over Sunday when we started the phone tree trying to find out what happened, and they won't easily forget the stress she put them through.

Life with an unmedicated bipolar teen is certainly interesting.

Thanks again for everyone's good wishes. Now comes the wallet emptying, while we try to see if Aetna will cover mental impatient.

Haele

[reyd reid reed]

24. My thoughts are with you...

I know the terrifying, paralyizing fear that you're feeling. I'm glad that the police are helping -- when my daughter took off last summer, the police here were horrible. I'm in Colorado -- let me know if there's anything I can do.

[ThomCat]

25. I hope you find her safe and okay.

:(

[KitchenWitch]

26. UPDATE: She is home!

:applause:

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=view_all&address=141x27307

[SeattleGirl]

28. That's great! Thanks for the update, Kitchey!

:applause: :applause: :applause:

[SarahB]

27. Best of wishes.

I'm on the other side of the country, but have a daughter the same age. I can't imagine what you're going through. I hope she is found safe and soon. :hug: