If your spouse flings their wedding ring across the room

[kedrys]

at you and screams "I don't want this anymore!", and it lands under the futon, and they make no attempt to retrieve it, and you fish it out and put it on a table where they can't fail to see it, and they don't put it back on for 4 days, does that constitute a divorce?

[cobalt1999]

1. No, sounds like someone is wanting attention,

, being immature, or making an power play.

I'd take off your ring and set it right next to it.

[militaryspouse]

2. re

4days? I can understand being mad for a day and getting over it, but if h/she hasn't put it back on. Sounds like this person is making a statement. Are you two at least communicating? That's key to resolving conflicts.

[kedrys]

10. That's a thought

It's definitely in the tantrum category, but it's never been quite this, er, spectacular.

[kwassa]

3. It constitutes a pretty serious problem in the relationship, IMHO.

This action is the result, not the cause of the problem. What issues stand behind it?

Nothing will improve or resolve until communication takes place. If you can't do it with each other without help, see a couples counselor.

[kedrys]

13. Issues and problems

S.O. is unemployed, we're broke, we need to decide whether to pitch the house in the process of filing for bankruptcy, and our neighbors are idiots. We're both under stress. :(

At least we had a semi-pleasant weekend and are definitely still talking to each other. There are a lot of eggshells on the floor, though.

[undeterred]

4. Its a separation ceremony of some sort

but has no legally binding power.

[Joe Fields]

5. Incomplete information. What precipitated this outburst?

[Little Wing]

6. Does it have a Donald Duck pez dipenser built-in?

You're not providing much information here.

[skygazer]

7. No

When you pick it up and shove it up their nose, while simultaneously kicking them out the door, it constitutes a divorce.

[zingaro]

8. Not divorce, but

surely a need for either a therapist or an attorney.

I'm sorry. I know how ugly and delicate a situation like that is. Anything an internet stranger can do for you?

:hug:

[Bassic]

9. Not quite,

but it's not a good sign either.

Have courage! :hug:

[jobycom]

11. That means "I need you to listen to me, or it's over." Divorce comes

when they are no longer pissed off enough to do such things. You scream in anger, you leave during moments of calm resolve. Though the longer that rings sits there, the more it looks like resolve.

I stopped wearing my ring a year or so before I considered it over. Once I even stopped wearing it for a while, then put it back on when I thought spouse was making an effort. The next time I took it off, it stayed off. By then, I was too worn out to scream or throw things.

[kedrys]

14. I've been listening

Apparently, part of the problem is that I don't have any miracle solutions to our various predicaments that don't involve compromise and sacrifice. :(

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

12. No.

It just constitutes a bad marriage, IMO.

[SarahB]

15. If only divorce WERE that easy.

Unfortunately, it's a lot more expensive, time-consuming, and annoying.

[bleedingheart]

16. I would recommend some counseling...

it can help...

[Ms_Dem_Meanor]

17. Sounds like they are being an idiot, INMHO. n/t

[Debi]

18. Certainly headed that way...but there's a whole lot more to divorce

than throwing the ring away.

[NewJeffCT]

19. My ex-wife did similar

though, she took off her ring quietly and left it there where I could easily see it.

It worked the first few times with her getting her way... but, it wore thin quickly, and by the time I knew our marriage was doomed, I just responded by taking mine off as well.

I'd recommend counseling. My ex refused to get any counseling, even though we had a few events negatively impact our marriage from the start... (and, if I tried to comfort her, she said I was smothering her. If I tried to give her space, I was being distant. So, it was a no-win situation that maybe counseling could have at least helped)

[rug]

20. I think the futon makes it a legal separation, not a divorce.

[LibraLiz1973]

21. Maybe not divorce

But a separation sounds in order.

Sorry.
:hug:

[JVS]

22. hawk it and buy some beer

[Fla Dem]

23. Sounds like serious problems, not resolvable here.

If there are children involved and/or you really want to save the marriage, I would seriously suggest some type of couples counseling. If not, and your as miserable in the relationship as she seems to be, maybe it's time to part ways.