Hilarious sexual politics at the wedding

[LostinVA]

Here are a few odd "attractions" from the wedding:

1. Haruka's step-aunt and my 17-year-old nephew
She was quite inebriated when the following conversation took place, in front of her husband.
HSA: So who was the hot guy in the kilt?
LIV: That was my nephew.
HSA: Oooo...how old is he.
LIV: 17.
HSA: He's hot. And his hair's soo sexy. He's really hot.

2. Haruka's friends (a male/female couple) get the hots for Pacifist Patriot
JPL: So, we've decided we've got the hots for your minister.
Haruka: She's married with three kids.
JPL: Damn, so I'm out, but she's still in! *points to AH*

3. AH feels me up
Not only did she get lipstick all over my face and neck, but she insisted I was cold. So, she gave me her shawl and felt up my ass. I had only met her once before, in a bar, for about 15 minutes.

4. Haruka's friend, Don, has the hots for my brother-in-law
Yep, Don's a pev. He found my BIL very "commanding." My BIL is a metrosexual, ex-military officer.

[Fire Walk With Me]

1. People is tha kwaziest peoples.

:)

[flvegan]

2. I enjoyed my phone call.

Haruka made me "promises" that I can't wait to cash in on. Talk about sexual politics...the Chachi in me says, "waa waa waa"

[LostinVA]

3. She did not make you any promises

I was standing right next to her. I heard everything that was said.

[flvegan]

4. Code, baby. Code.

[LostinVA]

5. No

[SammyWinstonJack]

14. lol

[Starbucks Anarchist]

6. I think I had an incident, too.

When I was about to leave, some woman (18-21ish) gave me this half-second "look."

I'm not sure if it was attraction or repulsion, though. I'm bad at these things.

[LostinVA]

7. OOOOO -- what did she look like?

[Starbucks Anarchist]

21. Umm.... white.

:P

Short, brown hair, not bad. Her friends were more attractive, though.

[Nevernose]

8. Weddings are really overrated

But I LIVE for receptions, and it sounds like I missed a great one!

What is it about marriage and an open bar that turns people into degenerates? :)

[LostinVA]

9. I have no idea

Apparently, Haruka's stepdad greased the bartender at the beginning. I believe him, since the drinks were VERY heavy pours. I also think my 10-year-old step cousin would have been served, since he didn't bat an eye at my 15-year-old niece.

[Nevernose]

11. YES! Now THAT's a wedding!

If it's not an open bar, then simple rules of etiquette require that the richest guy in the room bribe the bartender.

Was it LeftyMom that said, "DU should get married more often?"

(and congrats)

[LostinVA]

12. It was open bar and the richest guy in the room did indeed bride the bartender

And LeftyMom did say that.

(thank you)

[Name removed]

10. Deleted sub-thread

Sub-thread removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[Name removed]

13. Deleted sub-thread

Sub-thread removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[DS1]

15. I clicked on the "Printer Friendly" version of this and the only thing that came out was

[GoddessOfGuinness]

16. Well I think the kid with the kilt was cute, too...

But in the "he'd make a nice boyfriend for my daughter if I had one" kind of way...

I once played for a wedding and reception where the groom got toasted and tried to hit on our cellist. He was lucky she didn't want to kick his ass on his wedding day.

[datasuspect]

17. I'm done here folks

make sure you tip your bartender.

thank you and good night

[flvegan]

18. You sure are.

[Name removed]

19. Deleted sub-thread

Sub-thread removed by moderator. Click here to review the message board rules.

[PaddyBlueEyes]

20. Lost

Congrats to you and 'ruka........I hope you had a wonderful time on your special day!!

[Tektonik]

22. Wow this thread got ugly fast

Congrats on getting hitched!

[bridgit]

23. ibtl...

[datasuspect]

27. 8:09 a.m. CST

seems like someone is allowing the message to stand.

[Crazy Dave]

24. The minister was pretty hot

;-)

You both looked beautiful too :hi:

[Sock Puppet]

25. This thread rules, for all the wrong reasons.

:thumbsup:

[meegbear]

26. It must have been wild ...

SINCE I WASN'T INVITED TO IT!

[Evergreen Emerald]

28. omg you guys are hysterical!

It sounds like fun was had by all. Congrats.

[Moderator]

29. A Notice from the Moderators:

Please keep this thread on topic, and civil. If you are not interested in it, the 'hide thread' function is very easy to use. Please do not respond to any disruptive replies in it - the 'alert' function is also easy to use, and is the correct way of dealing with posts you think break DU rules. Responses to bad posts may well get deleted along with them, as some of you will have found out. You are just wasting your time when you respond to posts that are likely to be deleted.

And finally, please keep the thread clean. It's OK so far, but we feel it has the potential to develop into a 'sex thread' if someone goes overboard.

[LostinVA]

30. Thank you

[redqueen]

31. Ha... sounds like a fun wedding!

And what the heck went on in this thread? :wtf: