There is a weird thing that happens when I phone certain businesses...It goes like this

[darkstar]

I wait while the phone rings.
A lady answers.
She says... And I am not making this up:
Thank you for calling ________________, It is a wonderful day here and we want you to do your business. What can we do to make your ending a happier one?

Maybe this doesn't bother most people but I would rather just have someone answer the phone and say "Hello, this is ________, what are you wearing?"

Or even, "Hello, do you want to get F'ed?"

(I have told the woman not to stop and she told me that her boss makes them not stop. I have talked to the boss and told him that it is enjoyable to listen to someone talk to me like I am starring in a John Holmes movie....)