PVnRT
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:08 PM
Original message |
The walkway outside of my cubicle is NOT A FUCKING CONFERENCE ROOM |
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Use this thread to vent about Bad Office Behavior, like:
- Fill the goddamn coffee pot. It takes two minutes. If you're too busy to fill it up, you're a worthless douchebag who shouldn't be drinking coffee.
- I don't want to hear your political opinions broadcast around the office. Chances are, they're fucking idiotic. Parroting Bill-O does not make you smart, fuckstick.
- I am not your amusement because you are bored. While you may view work as a social club to meet and greet and gossip with everyone as you take your half-hourly break, I am here to get work done. If I want to speak with you, I will speak with you. When I turn back to my computer, this is a sign that there is no longer a conversation and it is time for you to leave.
- Speaking of which, don't you have some work to do, rather than eavesdropping around my cubicle and then offering me "advice" about the work I have? Dickcheese, I will do one of two things to get your opinion:
1) Specifically ask for your help 2) Beat it out of your bloody corpse
- It is NOT too cold in here. Maybe you should try, I don't know, dressing warmer rather than cranking the office thermostat up to the point where I'm falling asleep.
- The fact that I do not have a door does not give you license to simply walk in and interrupt what I'm doing. Knock, shuffle your feet, cough, say "Excuse me," do what you have to do, but try not being a total cock and respect what modicum of privacy I do have here.
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OPERATIONMINDCRIME
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:11 PM
Response to Original message |
1. Oh Oh Oh! Don't Forget: If You're Going To Fart, Do It In Your OWN Damn Cube!!!!! |
mainegreen
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:13 PM
Response to Original message |
2. If I'm taking a bite out of my sandwich, perhaps now is not the time... |
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to have that in depth conversation about that project/bug/customer/new account. I like to enjoy my sandwich in private, perhaps peruse the news or read my book. We have a 8 hour work day, and I'm here 9-10 hours. That means my lunch hour is not to be spent working, unless you personally wish to pay me overtime from your salary.
Then I will consider it.
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unpossibles
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:36 PM
Response to Reply #2 |
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I had a friend whose boss actually took a bite out of her sandwich one day. It was bad enough that he was nosey already - checking out what she was eating closely, sometimes smelling it, but one day he actually picked up her sandwich and took a bite!
Wow. She quit, obviously, although not right away.
I have a coworker who has zero social skills and often hovers over/around when you are eating and/or trying to leave for the evening. She asks a question - usually barging into my cube with no attempt at a warning, then continues to keep talking about nothing for 20-40 minutes while you try to answer her. The whole time, she looks over your shoulder at the screen. Blech. She is completely impervious to polite attempts to end the conversation and has even stood there talking after I've pointedly gone back to work and/or replaced my headphones. I swear I've tried to be nice about it, but finally gave up.
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mainegreen
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Mon Feb-11-08 08:51 PM
Response to Reply #13 |
26. Took at bite out of her sandwich?? |
TrogL
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:16 PM
Response to Original message |
3. Enough with the fucking perfume |
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Do I set off tear gas in your cubicle?
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PVnRT
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:17 PM
Response to Reply #3 |
5. In conjunction with OMC's comment |
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If I have to slip on my M40 gas mask while sitting at my cubicle, YOU are the problem. Please go shower.
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Westegg
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:17 PM
Response to Original message |
4. "Just like me/They long to be..." |
Ikonoklast
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:18 PM
Response to Original message |
6. Someone take your stapler? |
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Bet you threatened to burn the place down.
:scared:
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PVnRT
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:20 PM
Response to Reply #6 |
7. No, but I do have violent fantasies about destroying the copier |
Ikonoklast
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:24 PM
Response to Reply #7 |
8. I'd love to stay and chat, but I have a 4:30 appointment with |
EstimatedProphet
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:27 PM
Response to Original message |
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All the areas here are conference rooms! Except for the areas that are break rooms, like outside my cubicle (next to the copy room and the candy desk, so everyone feels the need to talk about American Idol as loudly as they can)!
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PVnRT
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:43 PM
Response to Reply #9 |
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You could have the NRA contingent working near you like I do. iPod takes me to my happy place.
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EstimatedProphet
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Mon Feb-11-08 10:30 PM
Response to Reply #14 |
27. That's why I have a MP3 player |
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Being forced to listen to people gab about TV shows doesn't help my mood. INTP.
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skater314159
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Thu Feb-14-08 02:20 PM
Response to Reply #27 |
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...and I think being half-deaf with an MP3 player has kept me from losing it on numerous gabbing/yammering ppl.
PRAISE THE MP3s! THEY HELP ME KEEP MY SANITY!!
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unpossibles
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:27 PM
Response to Original message |
10. OMG, do we work together? |
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I swear I have the same problem here.
One bright side: the worst offender recently was moved to another floor, so at least I no longer have to overhear him telling offensive jokes or farting.
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underpants
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:29 PM
Response to Original message |
PVnRT
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Mon Feb-11-08 04:36 PM
Response to Reply #11 |
12. Wow, I have almost the same person here |
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East-coaster (Maryland), talks a hundred words a second, interrupts people, has no tact whatsoever, TALKS VERY LOUDLY AND ARGUES ON THE PHONE WITH HER BOSS, thinks everyone is stupid, etc.
She's going to Spain in March to get married. I will celebrate the fact she's on another continent.
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AngryOldDem
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Mon Feb-11-08 06:10 PM
Response to Original message |
15. Answer the fucking phone! |
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You know, that blocky thing that has a funny-looking object attached by a cord to its body, and has a pad full of numbers? It also at times emits a noise that could be aptly described as a ring. But it may be a beep, or a chirp, or some other sound effect. It's a communication device that has been around for more than 100 years now, but will only work IF YOU PICK UP THE DAMNED THING!!
So do it.
Thank you.
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GCP
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Mon Feb-11-08 06:18 PM
Response to Original message |
16. DS1 - is that you? !! |
Darth_Kitten
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Mon Feb-11-08 06:21 PM
Response to Original message |
17. Why do people who smoke get 10 more coffee breaks a day than non-smokers? |
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:shrug:
When you eat in the lunchroom, don't SCRAPE YOUR BLOODY TEETH ON THE FORK!!!!
:(
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Amerigo Vespucci
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Mon Feb-11-08 06:26 PM
Response to Original message |
18. You forgot "do not borrow (and keep) items from my desk" |
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Edited on Mon Feb-11-08 06:26 PM by Amerigo Vespucci
I especially liked your "It is NOT too cold in here" comment...
...I have memories of being in a balmy, stuffy, dry-out-your-sinuses office and having people whine "I'm FREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEzing..."
:rofl:
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Auggie
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Mon Feb-11-08 07:15 PM
Response to Original message |
19. Eat your smelly, stinking lunches outside |
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I don't need to smell bad tuna fish for the rest of the day
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PVnRT
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Mon Feb-11-08 07:33 PM
Response to Reply #19 |
21. And close your mouth while doing it |
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I really don't need to hear the guy in the cubicle next to me have oral sex with his food.
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JBoy
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Mon Feb-11-08 07:23 PM
Response to Original message |
20. You whistle, you die. n/t |
fudge stripe cookays
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Mon Feb-11-08 07:35 PM
Response to Original message |
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:applause: I don't want to hear your political opinions broadcast around the office. Chances are, they're fucking idiotic. Parroting Bill-O does not make you smart, fuckstick.Aah. I see you also worked at GE in Waukesha. Sucks, doesn't it? Oh, and Bob....
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lizerdbits
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Mon Feb-11-08 08:08 PM
Response to Original message |
23. My cube is in the whine-o-matic conference room |
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I have headphones to drown her out but even when turned up to the point of hurting my ears I can still hear her whining. If you have enough time to whine that much (and spend a fair amount of time whispering about everyone else in the building to other coworker) why the hell are you whining?! You obviously aren't that busy and unlike me your boss isn't a control freak psycho. Her husband was a repub politician so it's not really surprising.
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Liberal Veteran
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Mon Feb-11-08 08:21 PM
Response to Original message |
24. And by the way...Call Dr. Phil or Jerry Springer if you want to air your trashy personal problems! |
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I was sympathetic a year ago when you told me your wife was cheating around on you, but after listening to you vent about it and yell at her over the cell phone, I think you both deserve one another!
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Auggie
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Mon Feb-11-08 08:28 PM
Response to Original message |
25. They're called headphones |
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I do not want to listen to your music. I am trying to concentrate, you selfish asshole.
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beach doug
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Thu Feb-14-08 02:11 PM
Response to Original message |
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Edited on Thu Feb-14-08 02:11 PM by beach doug
You see that black tray on my desk that has a sticker that says IN? That's my INBOX. My chair is NOT my fucking INBOX. Shit on my chair gets tossed or buried for a long time. God damn douchebags.
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Mon May 06th 2024, 04:19 AM
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