Three guys see woman's photo in obit section. Decide she's hittable. Start digging her up for sex

[DS1]

http://www.channel3000.com/news/9861183/detail.html


LANCASTER, Wis. -- Three men accused of trying to dig up a young woman's body to have sex with it had charges of attempted sexual assault dismissed Friday by a judge who noted Wisconsin has no law against necrophilia.

Grant County Circuit Judge George Curry dismissed those charges against twins Nicholas and Alexander Grunke of Ridgeway and Dustin Radke of Mineral Point, but they still face lesser charges.

The three 20-year-olds were arrested after an alleged attempt to dig up Laura Tennessen, 20, of Cassville, who was killed Aug. 27 in a motorcycle crash and buried at the St. Charles Catholic Cemetery in Cassville.

Grant County Sheriff Keith Govier said the three were not acquainted with Tennessen but had seen an obituary with her photo.








:rofl: :yoiks: :flee!:

[supernova]

1. They couldn't just hire a hooker?

:shrug:

[DS1]

2. Occam's stiffy strikes again

[originalpckelly]

5. No, they WANTED to have sex with a dead chick for a long time I guess...

so they'd have to kill her.

Stealing already dead body = lesser crime that making a new one, I guess.

[originalpckelly]

3. "Stiffs lasting more than four hours require immediate medical attention."

[MrCoffee]

6. no. no no. oh please no.

:cry:

[redqueen]

4. Something is very, very wrong with those boys.

They should be locked up for a very, very, very, very, very, very, very long time.

[originalpckelly]

8. Oh don't be too hard on them...

I know they'd fall into the "creepy/may-eat-me/unfuckable" dude category for me, so I can imagine what a woman thinks.

[redqueen]

17. Nah, I acutally dig the nerd look...

pasty skin, glasses, shyness... all very appealing to me.

Well... before I read this! They may have ruined geeks for me. :(

[DS1]

19. Dig the nerd look, eh

I'm sure you can dig some up. Nerds die, too.

[redqueen]

28. EW!

EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEW!

[originalpckelly]

21. These aren't nice geeks, I'd totally do the geeks (being one myself)...

but these guys give me that whole Tim Burton character feel.

[redqueen]

30. Oh... well... I guess I like freaks, too, then.

Cause I don't see what's so bad about Tim Burton characters. :

:shrug:

[youthere]

60. Dig?

[redqueen]

68. That was completely unintentional...

:rofl:

[Throckmorton]

108. He's just an excitable boy

He came to dinner in his Sunday best
Excitable Boy they all Said
He smeared to Pot Roast all over his chest
He's just and excitable boy.

[MrCoffee]

7. Oh please. Who among us hasn't wanted to fuck the dead body of a hottie from the obit section?

Let you who is without sin cast the first stone.

[originalpckelly]

9. Just make sure it isn't a headstone.

[MrCoffee]

10. you're on fire in this thread

which scares the bejeezus out of me, to be perfectly honest.

[DS1]

13. Give a man a corpse and he'll have sex a few times. Give a man a shovel

and he'll be going all night

[originalpckelly]

18. Is it getting hot in here, or is this hell?

Oh crap, it's hell again! Damnit, I hate this place, the air conditioning's always broken and it's like 1000 degrees outside.

[Dr. Strange]

38. Allow me to cast!

[racaulk]

41. Back atcha!

[Dr. Strange]

47. I think we're on a "roll."

Can I get a high five?

[CreekDog]

101. that's what she looked like after they dug her up?

how many days before was she buried? :shrug:

[youthere]

61. Is that a trick question? I'm not answering any questions without my attorney.

[MrCoffee]

70. I'm sure we'll be able to dig through and unearth some answers

[JVS]

74. The obits are like the craigslist casual encounters section

[PeaceNikki]

11. I read your headline and thought: "AGAIN!?!?!"

Thankfully that's the same story from 9/2006... whew.

[originalpckelly]

14. This is America, I wouldn't be surprised if this happens a lot.

It's a good ad for cremation.

[flvegan]

12. Lovely mugshots

Laura Tennessen

[originalpckelly]

16. They look like they're already dead themselves.

[mopinko]

23. no wonder

guess there were no cows around, either.

[racaulk]

42. Don't they have combs in Wisconsin?

Those guys look like they just rolled out of bed.

[JVS]

76. Like you'd look any better after being apprehended trying to fuck a corpse

:eyes:

[asthmaticeog]

89. That is now my favorite Lounge post in recent memory.

Bravo, sir. Bra-fucking-vo.

[racaulk]

94. Well, I keep my hair cut pretty short.

So in that regard, yeah, I probably would look better.

[youthere]

72. This explains A LOT.

[JVS]

75. Damn Emo-kids, trying to fuck our dead!

[BreweryYardRat]

104. On a serious note -- is it just me or do they all look like they've got fetal alcohol syndrome?

Something in the size and shape of their heads...

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

15. Where is Matcom?

I can understand him missing the story about the guy impaled by a tree, because the guy didn't impale himself intentionally.

But this! Matcom should have been all over this! I think vacations have made him soft.

:rofl:

On the other hand, these three guys were not digging up a goat, so maybe this is too "normal".



Thanks, DS1, it's good to know that not all news is about the election.

[tigereye]

20. oh, tell me this isn't true..

that's so horrible! :cry:

[momophile]

22. omg. another good reason to be cremated

imo.

gross.

[Pacifist Patriot]

85. First thought I had!

[PeaceNikki]

24. Follow the cases here:

http://wcca.wicourts.gov/simpleCaseSearch.xsl;jsessionid=3241EFFDC2453024E2782F298518DC0B.render2">Wisconsin Circuit Court Access (WCCA)

State of Wisconsin vs. Nicholas Grunke
Grant County Case Number 2006CF000140B
Count No. Statute Description Severity Disposition
1 943.20(1)(a) Theft-Movable Property <=$2500 Misd. A
2 940.225(3) 3rd Degree Sexual Assault Felony G

State of Wisconsin vs. Alexander Grunke
Grant County Case Number 2006CF000140A
Count No. Statute Description Severity Disposition
1 943.20(1)(a) Theft-Movable Property <=$2500 Misd. A
2 940.225(3) 3rd Degree Sexual Assault

State of Wisconsin vs. Dustin Radke
Grant County Case Number 2006CF000140C
Count No. Statute Description Severity Disposition
1 943.20(1)(a) Theft-Movable Property <=$2500 Misd. A
2 940.225(3) 3rd Degree Sexual Assault

[originalpckelly]

36. "Theft-Movable Property"

They need a "don't fuck dead people" statute in that state!

[Jamastiene]

81. Oooh, low blow.

Sizzle. :P

[soleft]

25. Eeek

[mainegreen]

26. The poor family of the woman who died.

I can't imagine. It must have been horrible having to deal with her death and this.

[GaYellowDawg]

34. Yes - they're the true victims here.

I couldn't imagine this - you've got the grief of losing someone like this unexpectedly and then you have to deal with a whole new kind of trauma.

[MissB]

27. A motorcycle crash.

All creepiness aside, her body couldn't have been in that great of shape.

[Guava Jelly]

29. Diggen for dates!!

Wow!! Now why didn't I think of that?:dunce:
I keep thinking of the song I love the dead.. by Alice Cooper for some reason

[MrCoffee]

31. Why doesn't Wisconsin have a statute prohibiting desecration of a corpse?

I don't get it.

[redqueen]

32. Texas took beatstiality laws off the books years ago...

who knows what the motivation was... I'm just glad they did!

:bounce:

[Phillycat]

45. Yep, at the same time they outlawed sodomy. Fuck a dog, but not your boyfriend!

Ah, Texas. Presumably, if you're male, you're only allowed to fuck female dogs. Because otherwise, that would be gay.

[redqueen]

46. Lotsa ranchers in texas...

just sayin.

[krispos42]

66. Why do ranchers go to the edge of a cliff to screw their sheep?

So the sheep pushes back!



Why do ranchers wear jeans with button flies?




The sound of the zipper scares the sheep!

:hide:

[redqueen]

67. Why do they wear their boots a size too large?

So they can fit the rear hooves in there...

[krispos42]

100. LOL

My boss told me that one, but I couldn't figure out how to put it in words!

:yourock:

[PeaceNikki]

35. Which seems to be why they are appealing the 3rd degree sexual assault charges.

Very odd.

[Rabrrrrrr]

39. Because Wisconsin has a long, proud heritage of corpse desecration, that's why.

Dammit!!

It's like a sport, and we produce the best corpse desecrators in the nation: Ed Gien and Jeffrey Dahmer and Radke and Grunke and others.

Though these two are a bit short of the mark, since they didn't eat any of her in the true Wisconsin tradition.

[PassingFair]

115. They must be putting something in the cheese.

[Javaman]

33. What? no photo?

LOLOLOLOL :rofl: LOLOLOLOLOLOL!!!!

[Enrique]

37. they like it dirty

:evilgrin:

[kwassa]

40. She was great in dead .... er, bed.

[Zookeeper]

43. Remember the Wisconsin man arrested for sex with dead deer?

http://www.suntimes.com/news/metro/803806,deer022008.article

He also killed a horse with the intention of "having sex" with it.

Does this happen everywhere or is Wisconsin just "special" this way?

:scared:

[redqueen]

49. Or the serial rapist of cows?

http://www.team4news.com/Global/story.asp?S=3003764&nav=0w0vWrl4

[Zookeeper]

50. I missed that one.

"He told police he never had sex with animals while maintaining a relationship with his girlfriend or his wife, the complaint said."

Well. I'm sure that makes his wife and girlfriend feel really special.

:eyes:

[GreenPartyVoter]

44. It never occurred to them that she wouldn't look (or feel, or smell) the same

as she did when the photo was taken!?

I don't understand the appeal of _wanting_ to have sex with a dead person. I really don't!

[Jamastiene]

82. I don't either.

Lucky for us, not many people do understand that strange urge. :weird:

[PassingFair]

116. Ummm....

they can't tell you to stop.

Or call the cops afterwards.

[underpants]

48. Yeah... but they LOOK like winners!

:shrug:

[cloudbase]

51. I don't think that's what he meant when he said,

Hey, guys. Want to go out for a cold one?

[MsKandice01]

52. Um, ew.

[TK421]

53. Of course she's hittable....she couldn't fight back, right?

:D very hittable, indeed

[Forkboy]

54. Necrophilia: When you absolutely have to crack open a cold one.

:hide:

[Xithras]

78. That's. Just. Wrong.

But funny as hell :rofl:

[Forkboy]

93. I'll available for kid's parties too.

:evilgrin:

[Skittles]

55. they were channeling Ed Gein

yes INDEED

[krispos42]

56. And last year this Wisconsonite gets busted...

For killing a deer, then having sex with it.

Must be something in the water?

http://www.democraticunderground.com/discuss/duboard.php?az=show_topic&forum=186&topic_id=19718

(read the replies, they are Lounge-worthy!!!)

[northzax]

109. have you ever BEEN to Wisconsin?

a primary diet of beer, cheese and bratwurst starts to make even a corpse look good.

and for everyone wondering why there is no law against it, can you imagine being the guy who introduced the bill? "er, yes, this is HR 435.46 a bill to outlaw the practice of having sex with dead people." "Excuse me, Representative Smith, what made you think of this law?" "er, I was, er, watching a movie on the teevee, yeah, that's it"

plus, it's not really a good campaign issue, right? Vote for Smith, he banned fucking dead people! (or the counter: while your business was struggling, John Smith spent his time passing laws against digging up dead bodies for sexual purposes. I will give you a tax cut!) real winner there.

[krispos42]

114. Couple of time...

with an ex-girlfriend. her family lived there.



We could title the anti-sex-with-animals bill the Neal Horsley Act...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neal_Horsley#Early_life




Mmmm... cheese

[BarenakedLady]

57. Gah.

That is disgusting beyond words.

:puke:

[Akoto]

58. Jesus. There are days I think I might be odd ...

... And then people like these three come along and change my mind.

[SOteric]

59. "...But your honour... I didn't know she was dead...

I thought she was English..."

[krispos42]

63. "She's not dead, she's resting"

[Midlodemocrat]

65. OMG!

:rofl:

:thumbsup:

[krispos42]

62. Isn't there a song about this?

♫ Knock. Three. Times. On the coffin-lid if you want me,
Twice-on-the-wood, if the answer is "noooooo"... ♫

:evilgrin:

[mike_c]

64. huh? doesn't everyone do this...?

:rofl:

[Iris]

69. um... she was in a motorcyle accident

chances are she might not be "doable" anymore.

[JVS]

77. Think of the accident as a "tenderizer"

[Iris]

84. uuuuu

that's the sound I just made - somewhere between a gasp, a gag, and a laugh!

[DS1]

90. oh my god

I will have to double my efforts to out-omg this one


:thumbsup:

[KitchenWitch]

71. You would have thought that Wisconsin would have had an anti necrophilia law

after Ed Gein and Jeffrey Dahmer...

[Jamastiene]

83. It must be mighty lonesome up there

for them NOT to have one after all these cases of necrophilia and let's not forget cannibalism. I wonder if they have a law for that yet? :wow:

[BreweryYardRat]

103. I'd think they'd avoid passing a law against cannibalism...

...after all, it's less wasteful. ;)

(It's a reference, not my own opinion.)

[JVS]

73. FREEDOM!

[Jamastiene]

79. Okay, I'm a really kinky pev when it comes right down to it,

but...

that is a little desperate...and gross...isn't it?

[RetroLounge]

80. Dude. September 15, 2006.

Why you hate Wisconsin?

:shrug:

RL

[DS1]

91. I don't hate Wisconsin

This was just making its rounds through the usual 'news' aggregates.

One of the funniest guys I've ever known is from Wisconsin. :shrug:

[RetroLounge]

95. Just funning you.

This is a whacked out state.

:hi:

RL

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

86. Good grief -- what is it about Wisconsin?

The place is almost as weird as Florida... Ed Gein, then Jeffrey Dahmer, and the guy who had sex with a dead deer. Seems like if you read about some totally weird, depraved incident it almost always turns out to have occurred in either Florida or Wisconsin (though Texas is probably on the list, too). And in Wisconsin there's almost always a corpse involved.

:rofl: :puke: :scared:

[harmonicon]

98. Dahmer was from Ohio

I know a woman he shared a locker with in highschool (this is completely true - it's the sister of one of my best friends). He asked her to the home coming dance, and when she said "no", he through a pumpkin through her car windshield. They didn't share a locker after that.

[Manifestor_of_Light]

99. speaking of dahmer

A friend of mine used to live about ten blocks away from Dahmer in Milwaukee.
Her son said he met Dahmer once in a bar and D. asked him if he'd like a ride to Chicago and the guy said "No I don't even know you". Good thing he didn't take Mr. Cannibal up on that offer or he'd be a shish kabob!

[Xipe Totec]

87. Can you get STDs from a corpse?

It would serve them right.

[stuntcat]

88. now that's BUSTED

:rofl:

[IntravenousDemilo]

92. Cemetery Girls (Barnes & Barnes)

I love to dance with cemetery girls
The moon comes out the earth unfurls
No time to waste, the hours fade
They come awake the dead parade

Fresh souls in the cornfield
Anthony put them there
And it's good, it's real good

I love to kiss the cemetery girls
Their lips are hard, blank eyes like pearls
I call them up, they come to me
A zombie pomp, pure ecstasy

I love to sleep with cemetery girls
Their legs are cold, sweet dusty curls
Pale pale breasts pressed to my cheek
When we make love, stiff muscles creak

I love to love the cemetery girls

I wish they all could be cemetery girls

Yeah

[buczak]

110. F* me dead

Reminds me of that Forgotten Rebels song "F*ck me dead"

I don't like the name tag between your toes
I don't like the snot running out of your nose
I don't like the stains on your pantyhose
just the cold stiff feeling when I hold you close

i like rigid mortis when it just sets in
i don't care where your going, i don't care where you've been
a pillow in a coffin is just as nice as a bed
and baby i love it when you f* me dead.

baby baby hold me close
quick quick before you decompose
baby baby hold me close
baby i love it when you f* me dead,
baby i love it when you f9 me dead.

[Lil Missy]

96. Ewwwww! That's disgusting! What is wrong with people? n/t

[MrSlayer]

97. Dead girls don't say "no".

As the saying goes.

[Submariner]

102. This kind of story could give wimmens the impression that men are weird

Tone down the dead and tenderized jokes men, or the wimmens won't go out with us anymore. They will think all of us guys are twisted.

[raccoon]

105. If they'd been from certain other states, mostly Southeastern states,

but also including Kansas, somebody would have said early on in this thread,

"Doesn't surprise me, in {insert name of state here}" or something similar.

[LeftinOH]

106. One deranged guy who wants to do this is weird...how does he find two more guys who

are into the same thing? That's even creepier. Just imagine the conversation that precipitated this. And lets see if any (live) women they want to date in the future -ones who know about this- will have anything to do with them. ICK!

[zingaro]

107. This is exactly what I was thinking.

Can you imagine the conversation? What sentence was the turning point between "ooh a hot chick who's dead" and "let's dig her up and fuck her."

Eww. Eww. Eww.

THREE of them. This might sound wrong but I really hope that they were heavily under the influence of something so that I don't have to consider the possibility that they thought this in their "rational" mind-state. Eww.

[NoGOPZone]

111. Maybe he put an ad on craiglist? nt

[NoGOPZone]

112. Can you imagine what a date with one of these guys must be like?

She: "So, what makes a woman attractive to you?"

He: "Rigor mortis"

[DS1]

113. When he takes his girls to the movies

he hears a lot of "Down in front!" yells from the back






because her stiff body won't do anything but stand against the chair

[DS1]

117. I guess this thread finally proves that you can't talk about anything in Wisconsin

without the topic of cheese and beer

[Taverner]

118. Well Ed Gein was from WI

Kinda makes you go hmmmmmmmmmmmmm

[The Animator]

119. We were just talking about this T-Shirt in another thread...