My cousin (in-law) shot himself in the head today...

[Mezzo]

A few weeks back, my cousin Veronica (nicest lady in the woooorld and loves cats...seriously) took in four kittens that my best friend's husband rescued during a SWAT mission. (ok, it was actually AFTER the swat thing, but whatever) She took all four to the vet and saved their little lives. We called while at dinner this evening to see if we could visit the kittens, and take some num-nums over for them (you know, catnip and toys,etc)

She picked up the phone hysterically sobbing. I asked her what was wrong and she told me it was her ex-husband (one of the first divorce parties I had known about...they were still very close) had gone to his father's grave and shot himself in the head.

He had recently spilt up with his girlfriend (we knew her too, again the divorce was amicable) and he stayed in a hotel a few nights, and then rented a room from someone he hardly knew. Veronica has another boyfriend now, and he lives with her, so Phil chose not to go there.

Veronica decided that we all had to go to the stranger's house and pick up Phil's things, because he hardly knew this guy.

This is the reason I am writing this.

THANK GOD I walked into his room before she did. He had his laptop screensaved with a homicide scene, a man who had blown his head off, and his bed was set up like a shrine. The bed, I left for her to see, but the laptop I covered. I think it was his way of letting people know where he was? I have no idea. Well, when Veronica's new boyfriend (and by new, I mean three or four years) came into the room, I showed him the laptop and he unplugged the computer. Now we can't access the computer because it is password protected and the word Veronica thought would be his password is actually the hint.

Truth be told, I do. not. want. her. to. see. that. homicide. image. EVER. It is just too much for her to take. I only saw it for a second, and I am upset about it.

So if anyone knows how to access a password protected computer so I can change the screensaver, please let me know. As for me, my birthday is Tuesday, and I imagine I'll spend it in a funeral parlor.

This sucks.

On edit: thank you all so much for your thoughts and well wishes. I wanted to clarify that Phil actually died when he shot himself. There are some wishing for his recovery, and it's too tough for me to go to each one to tell them he is actually gone.

Everyone else (and those guys too, I know the intention is good) THANK YOU. I can't even express how much better I feel for having talked about this.

[CaliforniaPeggy]

1. Oh my dear Mezzo...

How horrible for you, and for all involved...

My deepest condolences for all of you...

What an awful waste, an awful thing to have happened...

I have no idea how to access the computer, but undoubtedly someone here will...

:hug:

[Mezzo]

11. you are sweet beyond words CaliforniaPeggy

It's just so bizarre. This was a successful man (at least financially) and reliving the past day in my head seems like someone else's story. This i something I read about, not what actually happens.

Now, my family will experience the indirect shame associated with publishing an "unexpected death" obituary.

Their son was in basic training for the Army (he insisted on joining not because he believed in this warm but because his grandfather and his father before him had both served in the Army and he was determined to follow in their footsteps. He is now on his way home.

[Tektonik]

2. I have no words

:hug:

[Mezzo]

12. those are the right words...and it is enough. Thank you! :)

[Bennyboy]

3. (((((((((GOOD VIBES))))))))))

Man oh man. I feel for your freinds and family.

[BuelahWitch]

4. I can't help you with your queston but...

:hug:

[Scooter24]

5. There are ways...

I know someone who use to work at a major electronics store who said there was a way to do it. I guess kids would sometimes log on and change screen savers to something inappropriate and they needed a way to get in and reset it.

I'll give him a call tomorrow and see if he can tell me how.

I'm so sorry! :hug:

[Mezzo]

13. I really appreciate that Scooter. nt

[FloridaJudy]

6. How awful.

I'm so sorry.

:cry:

[Haole Girl]

7. That is so awful

His suicide illustrates, well, I am afraid, how very irrational an act suicide can be. :hug:

[GoddessOfGuinness]

8. Keeping you and all your family in my thoughts...

I'm so sorry...
:hug::hug::hug:

[LeftyMom]

9. Assuming there's nothing on there anybody needs to recover

Just swap the HD our for another and run a hole through that one with a powerdrill. Or put it in a safe deposit if you think it might be needed for law enforcement or something. It's the only real way of ensuring that the image and whatever other disturbing shit he left on there without creating a lot more drama.

[Mezzo]

17. I think his will is on it (but I am not sure)

his letter said that he made a will and he has the copy. (I have no idea what that means)

[Longhorn]

10. Oh, no, I'm so sorry!

:hug:

[barb162]

14. That's a terrible story. I really hope he recovers and gets help.

I'm sorry you had to have this experience.

[Mezzo]

15. He died barb162. But thank you for your kind words.

[barb162]

21. OH. I am really sorry

I assumed he was in the hospital in critical condition. Oh this is really bad. Sigh.

[colortech]

16. sorry to hear that

hope he gets well soon.

[drmeow]

18. Man that sucks

As for the computer - is it the screen saver or the background image? If it is the screen saver it won't boot to that image so if you know the password (do you know it from the hint?) you could boot it and turn off the screen saver. If it is the background picture you could boot it in safe mode and try to find the photo and delete it.

[Mezzo]

20. It was frozen on the screen when I walked into the room...

and I am a mac girl. This is windows, so I am not sure how he did it.

Thank you though.

[LeftyMom]

22. If it didn't have icons or a start button overlayed, it's a screen saver,

not the background image. Though he could have saved it to background also, or put some other nasty surprise there, so if you're cleaning the computer up be prepared for that.

[mike_c]

19. damn, very sorry for your family's loss....

That is a hard one. Damn. I wish I could offer something other than condolences. Be strong. :hug:

[Kutjara]

23. I'm sorry for both the loss of this man's life...

...and for the trauma it's causing to all those who knew him. Suicide is a terrible thing, and resonates forever in the hearts of those left behind.

Here's one way you can get into the PC:

(1) Boot the machine and note the username for the account you're trying to access. Shut the PC down.
(2) Using another computer, go to http://trinityhome.org/Home/index.php?wpid=1&front_id=12 and download the Trinity Rescue Kit.
(3) Burn this ISO file onto a CD; use a simple program like ISO Recorder to do this rather than trying to use the crappy built-in Windows CD burning software (you can get ISO Recorder at http://isorecorder.alexfeinman.com/isorecorder.htm). Once you've installed ISO Recorder, you can just right click on the Trinity Rescue Kit ISO file, choose "Copy Image to CD", hit Enter, and ISO Recorder will do the rest.
(4) Boot the computer you want to access, holding down the F2 key to get into the BIOS settings. Find the "boot order" section and move the CD or DVD drive up to the top of the list.
(5) Put the Trinity Rescue Kit disk in the CD drive and allow the machine to boot fully. It will boot from the CD instead of the hard drive, so it will take a bit longer to boot than you're probably used to.
(6) When Trinity has fully booted, you'll get a command prompt. Type "winpass -u username" (without the quotation marks), where 'username' is the one you noted in step number (1).
(7) Trinity will then search for any Windows installations and give you a list of the ones it finds (this will probably be just one).
(8) Choose the Windows installation and then, when prompted, either enter a new password or just type an asterisk to choose a blank password.
(9) Reboot the machine, holding down F2 again to enter BIOS. Now make the Hard Disk the first thing in the list of boot devices.
(10) Remove the Trinity CD from the drive and allow the machine to boot normally.
(11) Windows will boot normally, and you'll be able to enter your new password and access the system.

I hope this helps.

[Madrone]

24. First - My codolences to you and your family.

As for the computer - there are multiple ways to accomplish this, all varying in difficulty and intensity. I'm going to tell you the EASIEST way - assuming he was a regular Joe and not a computer admin of some type that would certainly not make it this easy. Also assuming that the computer is Windows XP.

Turn the computer on, and as it's booting (BEFORE it boots) start tapping the F8 key. Truthfully, you only need hit it once but it must be timed precisely - so if you just start tapping it as soon as you turn it on you're pretty assured you'll get it. You are trying to boot the computer into SafeMode. It should boot to a black screen with white letters with a number of options. You want to choose SAFE MODE. (If it boots to regular looking Windows screen you missed the F8 moment - turn it off and try again). Safe Mode will boot with a limited color scheme, so everything will look a bit wonky. At login type "Administrator" - leave the password blank, and try logging in. Every XP machine has a hidden Administrator account with a blank password by default. Most people aren't aware it's there - so doing what I said should work. If he was aware of this however, he may have given it a password and you're back at square one.

Hope this helps.

[Kutjara]

26. Definitely try this first.

If it doesn't work, however, the method I've outlined above will. It's more complicated, though, so give this a go first.

[BarenakedLady]

25. I'm so sorry

How difficult for all of you.

:hug:

[rockymountaindem]

27. I'm very sorry

I don't know how I would react to that discovery in his bedroom, though. I'm sorry you had to see that. You sound like a very good cousin.

[Maraya1969]

28. I am so sorry.

:hug:

[TrogL]

29. I'm not aware of anyway of breaking teh password - reinstall the OS

[Kutjara]

31. There might be important documents on the laptop.

The OP said the will may be there, and there could be other files that are important to keep.

Fortunately, the little penguin you have as your avatar has a way (hasn't he always?). See my post above for a step-by-step guide. It's good for any Windows user to have one of these disks handy, just in case.

[JustABozoOnThisBus]

30. That is sad news, no words, but about the computer ...

you can pull the disk drive, mount it as a second drive in some other computer (2.5-to-3.5 inch adapters are cheap, as are 2.5"-to-external USB housings). If the drive itself wasn't encrypted (unlikely), you can recover the files, including the will. I don't know about the legality of the will, you probably need the signed paper copy.

Then you can put the disk back into the laptop, and re-install the operating system.

I'm sorry for your loss, and for the feelings that drove him to this end. It is terrible.

[ThomCat]

32. I hope you're all handling the stress of this well.

:grouphug:

Wow. :(

[zanne]

33. My thoughts are with you and your family.

I hope you have the opportunity to talk about it some more. That can only help. Sending good vibes your way.

[BeachBaby]

34. Maybe this will help you....

I read your post to my techie boyfriend, and he told me to post this to you....

Another option to access everything without wrangling with Windoze.

a) Go to http://www.knoppix.org and download (it's a live CD
distribution of Linux).

b) Burn Knoppix to a blank CD.

c) Place Knoppix CD in his machine's CD/DVD drive and reboot. It should
boot right into Knoppix.

d) After it's done loading, the drives will show up as icons on the
desktop. From there, the most you *may* have to do is right click on those
drives and select "mount". That's it... you're in.

I hope this works for you...he told me it's the easiest route to take with something like that.

My deepest sympathies go to you, your cousin and your family. I'm so sorry. Thinking about you. :hug:

[applegrove]

35. Very sad.

[NC_Nurse]

36. I am so sorry. That's terrible:(

I'm so glad she has you to support her at this time. I don't know much about
computers, but I bet someone here does.
My condolences to you and your cousin. :hug:

[ScreamingMeemie]

37. I am so very sorry for your loss and for the pain you are witness to.

It is something you never get over.