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How Would Your First Time Have Been Better?

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THUNDER HANDS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:10 AM
Original message
How Would Your First Time Have Been Better?
If you had to step into the wayback machine and travel back in time to the day you lost your (oh lets call it purity) - what would you have done differently?

Different person?
Different place?
Different style?

My SO is still a virginian, so I want to make sure she's treated right when that time actually does come. So any hints or suggestions about what went right (or wrong) for you your first time would be appreciated.

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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:18 AM
Response to Original message
1. Everything...absolutely everything...it was horrid. Wrong person and
place and for the wrong reasons and it all went horribly wrong and it was disaster.
You are on the right track already just by giving a shit...bless you for that...
If this is indeed the right relationship for you and for her, and it goes to that level (and don't be afraid to give it time...if it's right, it will last long enough to develop the strong foundation needed to last even longer!) then be thoughtful, loving and gentle and it will probably all be just grand...maybe even ask her at some point what her heart's desire has always been...what has she hoped for or envisioned?
Just don't rush things...for her sake and yours...
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Screaming Lord Byron Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:19 AM
Response to Original message
2. I'd have asked for more money.
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LynneSin Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:20 AM
Response to Original message
3. so your SO is from Virginia?
wow, that's a hell of a commute just to take her out on the date. I hope she lives in North Virginia - driving to the southern or western part of the state can be a long ass haul!!
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THUNDER HANDS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:23 AM
Response to Reply #3
4. that's what I call it
Sure beats the women from Slutsville that I used to date.

:D
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trotsky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:23 AM
Response to Original message
5. Wouldn't change a thing.
I was 19, she was 20, it was the first time for both of us. We were in love, so it was perfect with all the expected limitations (no experience, etc.).
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YNGW Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:25 AM
Response to Original message
6. Make Sure You Scream Out The Right First Name.
Always a bonus. Insures a more likely second time. ;-)
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Bertha Venation Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:26 AM
Response to Original message
7. it would've been done with no shame, no rush, and
with clothes off.
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kar_the_terrible Donating Member (12 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:28 AM
Response to Reply #7
9. Maybe not in her parent's bedroom.....
...Where we left a few telltale clues to send me underground for a month.
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supernova Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:27 AM
Response to Original message
8. Wrong person plus the room was too cold
My then boyfriend's basement apartment at New Years. By the time we got naked, I was freezing. :scared: He was too rough and I was NEVER able to get him to lighten up or slow down over the course of the relationship. Eventually I gave up.

So just take your time. Be gentle with her. Ask her what she thinks she might like about "that night" and do that (if it's reasonable) when the time comes. Also just talking about is extremely sexy. Make it a special event. :D And make sure the room is warm! :P :D :loveya:

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THUNDER HANDS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:30 AM
Response to Reply #8
10. warm room...got it
I never would have thought of that. I'll check the thermostat.
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YNGW Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:30 AM
Response to Reply #8
11. Missy?? Is that you!?!
:loveya:

:hi:
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supernova Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:00 AM
Response to Reply #11
21. Heh
:hi:

Probably not. That original person was not nice, and I was too stupid to realize it.

You seem like a nice person YNGW.
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Shananigans Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:44 AM
Response to Original message
12. The fact that you know her well is one up on me...
I got sick of being a virgin and had a once night stand. Maybe not the best idea, but it happened and I guess I don't really regret it that much.

Just make sure she is comfortable. That's all I say.
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:45 AM
Response to Reply #12
13. heh, me too
Did ~everything~ the first time with a girl I barely even knew in the back of a car, then my friend got in and took seconds while I waited outside and watched for cops.

/romantic
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THUNDER HANDS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:47 AM
Response to Reply #13
15. wow
You shared a girl your first time?
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:51 AM
Response to Reply #15
16. I suppose
I'm really not hung up on it, in fact I find it rather amusing
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THUNDER HANDS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:47 AM
Response to Reply #12
14. she will be
I plan on taking her someplace that's semi-romantic, like a vacation on the beach somewhere.

Her first time isn't going to be in my bedroom or her basement or anything. If I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna do it right.
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radwriter0555 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:52 AM
Response to Reply #14
29. uh does she know you're planning the great 'de-flowering'?? Is she
expressing agreement on your plan here?
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kcwayne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:54 AM
Response to Original message
17. I would suggests that you put away the pictures of Mr. T
Its not usual for a first timer to be eroticized by visions of mindless violence and brute strength. Of course I was a first timer before Mr. T had his 15 minutes, so I could be wrong about the current generation.
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THUNDER HANDS Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:55 AM
Response to Reply #17
18. you must have never seen the A-Team
B.A. Barakus was a lover, not a fighter. ;)
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DS1 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:56 AM
Response to Reply #18
19. He was a man of great empathy
:evilgrin:
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kcwayne Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:00 AM
Response to Reply #18
22. Oh, so she's into pro wrestling.
So shave your head, put a big frown on your face, grease up clench your fist at her. Call her a fool once, and throw in a ho for good measure. She'll love it.
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northzax Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 10:57 AM
Response to Original message
20. more toys, more whips, more chains, less syphillis
Edited on Tue Mar-09-04 10:57 AM by northzax
if you're going to make it special, really make it special, you know?
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rogerashton Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:00 AM
Response to Original message
23. Well, if the bed hadn't collapsed.
It really did. No lie.
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Beaker Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:02 AM
Response to Original message
24. don't buy the cow until you've tasted the milk...
that would be my suggestion.
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Beaker Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:05 AM
Response to Original message
25. it wasn't my first time, but it was hers...
and it probably would have gone better if she hadn't contracted a staph infection from, well...my staff...I didn't know i had it 'til she got it...(btw- it wasn't vd, and it wasn't the end of the relationship)
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grannylib Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:07 AM
Response to Original message
26. Not in a car; not in a cheap motel; use protection; be physically
affectionate outside of bed without always expecting it to lead to nookie
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radwriter0555 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:12 AM
Response to Original message
27. Romance, romance, romance, romance.. No over-boozing... lots of LOVE
and sweetness.

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radwriter0555 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:51 AM
Response to Reply #27
28. Oh, and a larger penis would have been much more appreciated...
even then.

Ahem.

Hope that won't be a problem.
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CanuckAmok Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 11:52 AM
Response to Original message
30. I would have been first in line, not fourth.
No further details offered.
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WillParkinson Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 12:23 PM
Response to Original message
31. Definitely a different person...
But I couldn't figure out a way for me to be someone else.
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Jeff in Cincinnati Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 12:28 PM
Response to Original message
32. I wouldn't have been alone!
Paging Rodney Dangerfield: Ritc2750 is stealing your act!
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camero Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 12:44 PM
Response to Original message
33. I would have kept going
I was scared to death of getting her pregnant.
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zbdent Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 01:30 PM
Response to Original message
34. Don't ask me for advice
Wife and I were both virgins when we got married.

As a teen, I used to joke that I was so unpopular that I couldn't "get lucky" on my wedding night. Little did I realize that reality would add the punchline. She fell asleep after a long day.

The first time (the next day) was awkward. But we're still married.
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Dogmudgeon Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Mar-09-04 01:36 PM
Response to Original message
35. Just like a dream
The aliens could have said "I love you" while they were hooking me up to the DNA extraction device.

I also didn't appreciate it very much that they laughed when they showed me the mind-projection images of Los Angeles being destroyed by a yet-uninvented thermonuclear device. But that's more like an afterplay issue.

They also could have remembered that on boys, the tag goes in the back.

--bkl
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