Snails offend me.

[rug]

Slimy little footless invertebrates.

[darkstar]

1. Snail-mailin' m-effer...

Just cause you got a mailbox you think you're better than me?

[rug]

9. No fuckin' horns either.

[Ptah]

2. Male snails offend me.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

11. Snails are hermaphroditic.

And they have love darts! http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Love_dart

[Ptah]

19. No sex threads!

[rug]

12. Nothing that a little butter won't take care of.

[HarukaTheTrophyWife]

3. How dare you offend the snails?!?!?!

I'm going to send a letter via snail mail to the Snail Liberation Front.

[rug]

13. By the team those slimy fuckers get here I'll have salt all over the sidewalk.

[JTG of the PRB]

4. How do you feel about slugs?

They're exactly like snails, except that they don't have that fancy pants shell on their backs.

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

8. They are NEKKID snails!

What will we tell the children?

[rug]

14. Damn exhibitionist footless slimeballs.

[SallyMander]

5. Actually all molluscs share 4 traits

foot, mantle, shell, and radula

http://userwww.sfsu.edu/~biol240/labs/lab_18molluscs/pages/architype.html

(although some are secondarily lost in some taxa... they all have a foot!)

[flvegan]

7. You CAN'T make me learn!!!!!!!

la-la-la-la-la

[SallyMander]

10. Ohhh, you're just asking for it

That's right -- SNAIL ANATOMY!!!

[Inchworm]

15. Seems like a bad design

Is there inside plumbing? It looks like he craps in his house :D

:hi:

[SallyMander]

18. A very good question!

His anus is right over his head... not so good, one would think. The gut is a nice normal line during embryological development, but then this thing called "torsion" happens, and the gut gets all twisted up in there. No one really knows why it happens. In slugs, they "de-tort" and things go back to normal.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Torsion_(gastropod)

Weird, right???

(I know all this miscellany because i teach an animal diversity course, so my head is full of random knowledge. LOL!)

[rug]

16. Who the hell studies snails for 8 years in their sexual prime?

[charlie and algernon]

6. just you wait, the Snail Liberation Front is on its way to your location

you best not move, they'll be there in two months!

[rug]

17. I'll have time to get a certificate in French cuisine.

Slimy footless escargot.

[NJmaverick]

20. They are not as bad as slugs (their nudist cousins)