Women: How do you feel when guys check out your boobs?

[NewJeffCT]

Article on yahoo today... warning creepy picture at the link.

How do you feel when guys check out your boobs?

Last night at an event honoring Michael Douglas, his father Kirk was caught gazing upon Catherine Zeta-Jones' breasts. She has a lovely décolletage and bountiful cleavage, but an older man checking out his daughter-in-law's rack? Kinda creepy.

The "my-eyes-are-up-here" phenomenon is one that has probably existed since the beginning of time and will never go away. Men see boobs and they can't help but look. Whether we wear a turtleneck or a low-cut top with a push-up bra, guys like checking out our boobs.

http://shine.yahoo.com/channel/sex/how-do-you-feel-when-guys-check-out-your-boobs-474991/

[Sky Masterson]

1. gawd I love boobs

Can't help it..They are like catnip to me.
So are nice bubble butts :D

[Heidi]

2. I think the author of that article is a jerk.

What? Older men aren't supposed to react to stimuli in the same way younger men do? Sheesh. They're old, not DEAD.

On the other hand, in real world situations when I detect a stranger--particularly a much older man--distracted and looking at my boobs I am completely grossed out and feel uncomfortable.

[jeff30997]

7. Two thumbs up Heidi !

Yes it's a biological reflex and it's very hard to resist.I prefer beautiful eyes but if there is cleavage in the same angle of view I can't help it,I zoom in on the irresistible targets.
C'est la vie ! :)

[Heidi]

8. And I bet you'll still look at beautiful eyes and exposed cleavage when you're 90 years old.

The author of that article pissed me off by suggesting older men are "gross." :grr:

Edited for apostrophication.

[Dyedinthewoolliberal]

26. Here's my theory...

ALL men, at ALL times, think there is at the least a chance, that they could , you know,,,,,, score! Regardless of how old we are and how young she is, Mother Nature has made sure men will always at least be aware of the presence of a woman. :)
I can tell myself I'm old enough to be her father but the little voice says 'yeah, but you're NOT her father. Go ahead, take a peek'

[Heidi]

28. That's an honest answer.

I don't know that your theory applies to all men, as some of all men are gay, but I'm married to a straight man and he is straight-guy proof of your theory. :hi:

[sarge43]

29. As my 67 year old faithful and discrete husband says,

"It.never.goes.away."

As his 66 year old wife says, "I'll be more concerned if and when he doesn't take a peek."

typo

[sarge43]

13. Yes, ma'am.

I can but hope author lives to a ripe old age and gets the 'eeewwww old people eeww' done to her.

[Vektor]

79. I agree with her, thought it's not based on age.

Anyone, of any age leering at my body parts would gross me out and make me uncomfortable, and rightly so.

That said, I don't go out in public actually showing anything, therefore, I don't give anyone reason/means to look. There's nothing for them to see.

[sarge43]

3. Unless he's being a slob about it, I put it on the "That's life" list.

That's what most guys do and it's a waste of time and energy to get mad about it.

Considering Cathy's headlights are shining right in Kirk's face, I'd be surprised if he weren't staring.

[poiuytsister]

4. At my age (N/A) I am flattered as hell,

unless they are using Braille.

[Deja Q]

5. I try not to look at any body parts, but it is sometimes inevitable.

I try not to look because I don't want to come across lewd or disrespectful, nor do I want to make a person feel uncomfortable.

Besides, my high energy persona does enough uncomfort-making to begin with...

But if the eyes wander, it is NOT out of intentional disrespect for anybody.

But if I become famous and start up an amusement park entitled "Melonland ranch" or "Balloonland", then duck for cover...

:hide:

[blue neen]

6. As long as they do it discreetly, it doesn't bother me much.

I do kind of feel like, "that's life". :)

[av8rdave]

9. Squeezed?

Oh, wait...I'm not female. That question wasn't for me.

[graywarrior]

10. You can check boobs out? Like from a library?

Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!

[Commie Pinko Dirtbag]

84. Hmmmmm... shelves of boobs...

[malta blue]

11. Reminds me how lucky my SO is that he gets

to bask in the glory of the MaltaBoobies!

[arcadian]

12. That is photographic entrapment

And it's a bullshit story. Photographers snap off hundreds or thousands of pictures at such events. Mr. Douglas could have probably been merely turning his head as somebody snapped that picture. It's cheap and it's dishonest. It presumes that a photograph can capture somebody's feeling or intent. It can not.

[gmoney]

17. Plus she's like 8 inches taller than him

so they are RIGHT THERE... hell, he may not even be able to raise his head back much further at his age, arthritis or whatever.

Yeah, a woman sticks her mostly exposed breasts six inches from my face, I get to check them out, no questions asked.

On edit... notice the ad that popped up next to the story:

[arcadian]

23. "Hey! Mr. Douglas? What do you think of Mrs, Zeta-Jones dress?"

*Kirk Douglas looks down at the dress*

Photographers: *click**click**click*

[janx]

35. Very good point!

Tabloid BS published online to push the advertising...some media never change. I can't help but wonder, though, since the claim is that the ad appeared on 60 Minutes, abc, Oprah, etc.--did they use that pic of the old woman? I mean that is positively ghoulish!

[Adsos Letter]

62. Excellent point, and directly to the mark.

[Turbineguy]

14. He might have just been

looking at her skin. There's a lot to look at there.

Just enjoying the view.

[distantearlywarning]

15. I don't like leering or other creepy-type behaviors

Surreptitious, polite "checking out", on the other hand, makes me feel flattered and amused.

If I didn't want you to do it at least a little bit, I wouldn't wear low-cut or tight shirts. :-)

[noamnety]

16. Men: how do you feel when people stare at your crotch?

When you're trying to have a conversation with someone and they make eye contact the whole time with your zipper, are you cool with that?

Does it matter if it's a young attractive woman, a woman you find repulsive for some reason, or the guy next to you in the restroom? Do you find it to be polite behavior?

[leeroysphitz]

18. You know, oddly enough it's never come up..

At least not that I've ever noticed.

[gmoney]

19. sorry to hear that...

they have pills for that now you know... ;)

[noamnety]

20. Yep, because people learn it's rude and don't do it.

women, on the other hand, are treated differently.

[taterguy]

21. Amused usually

Doesn't happen often though

[KG]

24. flattered.

[realisticphish]

30. that's a tad unfair

most of the time, it's not like there's anything to see down there, depending on what you're wearing.

Whereas breasts... they're pretty much always there. :shrug:

I'm in the "surreptitious is whatever, staring is creepy" camp



*and if it's a guy next to you in the restroom, it doesn't matter WHAT he's looking at, he's violating Man Law by not keeping direct eye contact with the wall in front of him ;)

[noamnety]

36. Perhaps it could be man law

to look women in the eye, no?

[realisticphish]

37. perhaps i should just blind myself

that way i wouldn't ever offend you, no?

[noamnety]

38. And other men in restrooms can blind themselves

so as not to offend you? :D

[realisticphish]

42. actually

i DO apologize for my post, it was overly hostile.

I think I just have an issue sometimes with people who seem to think that any visual notice of a woman's attractiveness is misogyny. Not that that's what YOU said, which is why I'm sorry about that.

And the bathroom thing isn't so much about offense, it's just considered weird. Like guys who stand like superman with their hands up on the walls.

[noamnety]

52. My point was just that

if men can learn etiquette while they are in restrooms, surely they can learn etiquette when they are in the rest of the world. Learning bathroom etiquette implies they are trainable. ;)

[Orrex]

74. The difference is that men's room etiquette is between similar individuals

So a commonality is assumed outright. Between a het male and a het female, the dynamic is more complex in this context.

In essence, male:male etiquette in the restroom is a directly reciprocal exchange of unspoken courtesies, whereas the ogling of breasts does not have a direct, common equivalent to which the average het male can immediately relate.

I'm not saying that this is laudable, or that men can't be trained, but that's my general assessment.

[Lucian]

31. I've been getting that a lot lately...

and I don't mind it at all. I've lost so much weight in the last few months that it's actually flattering that people are noticing me now, whether it's my crotch or my ass. :)

[Amerigo Vespucci]

39. Had it happen once

Probably more than once, but this one instance was so obvious that it could not be ignored.

I was standing up, a woman was sitting down, and I saw her eyes go up from my head, down to my shoes, and up again, as if there were a bulls-eye painted on my johnson. She stared at it for about ten seconds, smiled, and stuck her nose back in her book.

She was probably in her early to mid 30s, dressed for the office, attractive.

It wasn't a turn-on and I did not feel flattered. I thought "This woman just stared at my dick."

So part of the reason I don't stare at various female body parts, other than the fact that I think it's a relatively classless thing to do, is that I've had it done to me and didn't really care for it at all.

[noamnety]

54. Thank you for getting it!

Imagine if you went through that 10-20 times a day, and when you walked down the street or across a campus, women felt the need to comment out loud - at least daily - on your crotch.

[Juche]

40. 1. Hasn't come up. 2. I don't go out of my way to draw attention to my crotch

aka, I don't wear skin tight jeans. If a woman is going to wear a dress with the intent that men notice her breasts, then gets upset that guys notice her breasts, that is her problem. Staring and glancing are not the same thing though.

I can't speak for women, but I will say that if you are going out of your way to draw attention to your body, then don't get mad at us when we notice your body.

[Forkboy]

80. Well, they're only human.

:hide:

[Deep13]

89. I've never noticed.

Maybe it's because a man's stuff is not close to eye-level or particularly noticeable through clothes. Since size or whatever is not really relevant to fertility, maybe women just have not evolved to be drawn to it.

[Pharlo]

22. More amused than anything.

Not being well endowed in the breast area, I know that if some guy is actually looking at mine, there is a high probability that I'm the only female in sight.

My reaction is typically a smirk as in "God, he MUST be desparate for something to look at."

[NewJeffCT]

25. No, probably not

guys like boobs in all shapes & sizes. Do bigger ones get noticed first and more, yes they do. But, I think most guys like them all.

[ScreamingMeemie]

27. With my hands.

[Richardo]

43. Winner

:rofl:

[MilesColtrane]

32. It can't be helped.

Bewbies have magic powers.

I mean, they make baby food for Christ's sake!

[Deep13]

33. This is an issue that has no obvious solution.

It's true men can't help noticing. Evolution has made us aware of feminine attributes that facilitate reproduction. And yet, I understand that looking creeps women out. So all I can do is to resist the natural urge to look. I notice and then make an effort not to notice. Hopefully most of the time it works.

[dana_b]

34. it depends

a glance - no big deal. When they stare, I get creeped out and turn away or, once or twice, I've bent down so that my eyes met theirs.

[NewJeffCT]

55. That's how I tend to look at it

as a guy...I make sure to stop well before it gets to leering. Though, I may have had my eyes pop out of my head a few times over the years, that isn't really leering.

[dana_b]

75. lol - that sounds like you were

taken by surprise.

I don't get mad unless they're intentionally stupid or rude about it.

[madeline_con]

41. He could just as easily have been looking at someone in the foreground, off camera.

It's not really clera where his "gaze" is resting. Damn, he's gotten OLD in the last few years!

[Lyric]

44. Depends on the context.

If he's leering while elbowing his buddies with a beer and a snicker, DIAF asshole.

If he's leering while we're discussing the literary use of synecdoche as a poetic device, no problem.

Only intelligent, creative, useful oglers get a pass from me. ;)

[MilesColtrane]

48. Soooo, if I say I'm simply admiring "thy swelling rack of purest ivory",...

...I'm just following in the tradition of the Petrarchan sonnet?

Works for me.

[KamaAina]

49. My vocabulary word for today is "synecdoche"

:evilgrin:

:loveya:

[Orrex]

71. Display thy breasts, my Julia—there let me

Behold that circummortal purity,
Between whose glories there my lips I’ll lay,
Ravish’d in that fair via lactea.

(emphasis original)

[siligut]

45. I usually don’t really care.

I don’t wear clothing that exaggerates or draws attention. One time it was creepy though. We had to have our pipes cleared and the guys were supposed to be able to take care of it without me.

Well, they ended up needing me. I was dressed in loose comfortable cotton pull over shirt. Anyway the one guy was being very nice and showing me on his computer screen what they were doing, this entailed me bending over and looking.

Well, basically he was being so “nice” so he could look down my shirt. Really creepy and irritating.

[Ikonoklast]

51. That was probably the most unintentionally funniest post I've ever read on DU.

We had to have our pipes cleared and the guys were supposed to be able to take care of it without me.

I'm really not too sure how to take that statement.



:rofl:

[siligut]

61. Especially in a thread like this one.

I see what you mean. I was trying to be brief so I could get to the subject of boobs. :rofl:

[Haole Girl]

46. A couple of comments/questions:

Do you think it would be "creepy" if it was a pic of Kirk Douglas looking at Catherine Zeta-Jones' breasts as a younger man (like the pic below)? Just curious which part you thought was creepy. The father-in-law part or the fact he is an old man now (?).



Also, yes, I find it creepy when men stare at my breasts at times. Especially when I have something important to say at work or when their wife is there! ick.

Other times, I don't mind as much. I do think, on that note, men could exercise a little more self-control where this is concerned.

That's all for now.

[NewJeffCT]

56. well, staring is different than glancing

though, I think a woman's threshold for when it becomes a stare vs a glance is often different than a guy's threshold.

But, for the woman that wrote the article, I would say it likely would be different if he was 50 years old instead of 93 like he is now.

[pokerfan]

47. Looking at cleavage is like looking at the sun.

You don't stare at it! It's too risky. You get a sense of it then you look away!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvGqPencrJQ

[madinmaryland]

65. Perfect answer!!!

:thumbsup:

[flvegan]

50. That's a two way street, you know.

[ccharles000]

53. eww boobs

[redqueen]

57. I really don't care.

However I do wish guys had to wear t-shirts with representations of their erect members on them, so we could ogle or ignore them accordingly as well.

[NewJeffCT]

58. or, very tight shorts

to leave nothing to the imagination.

[redqueen]

59. No way.

I have absolutely no desire to ogle flaccid members.

Also, it'd be unfair to the growers.

[tigereye]

99. "unfair to the growers"

:rofl:


That's funny, RQ!

[Red State Rebel]

60. At 52 I can't be sure if they are looking at my boobs or my navel....

Just kidding! Todays bras are modern marvels of engineering - keeps the girls high and tight!

[insanity]

63. My rule is I'll glance but not stare and when we are talking I'll look you in the eye.

[NashVegas]

64. It Wouldn't Be So Bad If They Had the Good Manners to SMILE If They See Something They Like

And I wrote "smile" not "leer."

If more young men had been taught by their parents to um ... respectfully show their pleasure over what I had no control over, my teenage years would have had one less reason to be awful.


With about 99 out of 100 guys, all they do is pass on their own shame.

[marzipanni]

66. As a non-spectacularly endowed woman, I would like to experience it for a day

so I could wear one of these-
http://secretfunspot.blogspot.com/2009/04/april-of-fools-squirtsnake-flower.html ;)

[Forkboy]

81. LOL

I'd have fallen for it. :rofl:

Having said that, large is highly overrated. I'm probably more liable to stare now. :)

[MineralMan]

67. See my titties? Don't look!

It's an awkward situation. When there's a lot of cleavage exposed, it's gonna get looked at. We're mammals, one and all.

Such is the win/lose situation men are often in.

[MajorChode]

68. Would women look if guys had half their weiner sticking out?

Perhaps that's a better question.

[Missy Vixen]

69. Depends on the guy

I am hopelessly inept re: contact with the opposite sex. Let's just say that the guy would practically have to have his face in my chest before I noticed he was looking at me. Plus, for the most part, nuns are more alluringly dressed than I am. Our former vet, though, spent more time talking to my breasts than he spent examining and treating our cat. That's why he's our former vet.

[Orrex]

70. Holy shit! I didn't know that Kirk Douglas is still alive.

After seeing that picture, I'm still not sure.

[NewJeffCT]

72. born in 1916

according to wikipedia... so, 92 or 93 years old

[Orrex]

73. Tough ol' bird

My first post was snarky, of course, but I honestly didn't know he was still alive. I recall that he had a pretty significant stroke a number of years ago, and I hadn't heard much of anything about him since then.

[Forkboy]

82. Tough ol' bird sounds like my holiday cooking experiences.

:)

[Odin2005]

76. For me it sometimes sucks being a 20-somthing male with a strong sex drive.

I can find myself staring at teh ladies without even realizing it. :dunce:

[Vektor]

77. I keep them well covered under baggy garb, so it doesn't happen too often.

They can't see 'em.

[old mark]

78. I guess if women feel strongly against guys looking at their boobs,

they should keep them covered up, right?
I'm nearly 62 and I love them all.


mark

[redqueen]

83. That's funny... like covering them up matters.

Hah.

[NewJeffCT]

85. That's true

"what's hiding under there?" some men might think.

[redqueen]

87. I *only* wear baggy clothes.

Makes not one damn bit of difference.

That 'don't show them off' stuff is nonsense.

[siligut]

94. Well, when you are built like you, it isn’t that easy.

Guys would look if you were dressed in a burka. Not trying to be obnoxious, just pointing out a fact.

[redqueen]

98. *roffle*

They're not *that* big... geez.

[JoDog]

86. I look at it this way...

I am blessed/cursed with 44DDD breasts. Once you get to that size, they become the mammary equal of an 800-lb. gorilla--Impossible to ignore. I tolerate some initial staring. When it becomes clear that the man is allowing "the girls" to distract him, I try to bring his attention back to my face.

When it became clear that I was going to have such a rack (thanks, Swedish genes!) I had a choice to make: accept it and deal with it, or compress them, be uncomfortable and hide. I chose to accept them. At least until I can afford reduction surgery.

[CBGLuthier]

88. Maybe an 82 year old stroke survivor

finds it difficult to lift his head?

But honestly, if you are going to put them out there they are going to be looked at and no one can complain.

[redqueen]

91. Men stare at them whether they're covered or not.

Nobody has to 'put them out there'... that's how women's bodies are designed.

And yes, anyone who wants to is free to complain.

[tigereye]

100. well, some women do emphasize them more than others with some serious

decolletage... to be fair, and I am sure some of we women like when they are noticed. But you are right that it shouldn't matter - they are just breasts, after all. I think it's a matter of discretion - discrete or inadvertent glance, fine, over-the top ogling, not so cool.


But in nature, people tend to notice sexual characteristics. It's ingrained. :shrug:

[redqueen]

103. Definitely so...

but it's a total fallacy that men only stare when they're accentuated with cleavage or necklaces and whatnot.

[tigereye]

104. mm, betting there's some psych study out there that delineates which is

more common. I don't know if it's a fallacy - "enhancements" might make a difference.

[redqueen]

105. Since men do look regardless

of whether or not they're accentuated, it doesn't matter if it's more common or less common. It happens, so the 'if you put them out there you can't complain' stuff is nonsense.

[tigereye]

106. to the scientists, it does!

:rofl:


I don't agree with you on this one.

[Fleshdancer]

90. In my 32 years, I've never noticed a man checking them out.

Perhaps it's because mine are smaller than average or because I usually have them covered, but I like to think it's because the men I interact with are polite enough to sneak in a look rather than blatantly stare.

My state has more than its fair share of crazies (especially our politicians), but I must say that I truly enjoy Texas men. Assuming they don't live in a frat house, many men here are gentlemen...just look at the ones here on DU. :)

[redqueen]

92. Dunno where you live

but Texas men around where I live and work stare plenty.

[Fleshdancer]

97. North Austin n/t

[IntravenousDemilo]

93. Yeah, as if women don't check out men's baskets all the time. n/m

[redqueen]

95. I'm totally serious about the t-shirt idea.

Seriously... make it easier on us.

I can't speak for other women, but I do catch myself looking. It's not a conscious thing. I embarrass myself.

[applegrove]

96. Two weeks ago I thought I had a man checking me out. Turns out he loves egypt and I had

a t-shirt on with egypt written across the girls. Lucky for all he said "Egypt - have you been there?"

[NewJeffCT]

101. no, he's just a quick thinker

he was staring at your boobs and managed to come up with the excuse that he liked Egypt because he saw that on your shirt. If your shirt had said a musical group on it, he'd have said they were his favorite group.

[pdx_prog]

102. Women enjoy being "checked out"

As does everyone. We work hard going to the gym, wearing nice clothes and spending time in the mirror just so people will notice us (especially the opposite sex). Women love being noticed, but there is a difference in a once up and down followed by a smile of approval and oogling someone.....that creeps you out no matter who is doing it...