When did vampires start becoming so fucking lame?

[LostInAnomie]

Ann Rice? Gothy douches having vampire parties? Twilight? True Blood?

When did they stop being cool undead monsters and turn into the sexy scene kids, and emo tormented souls? Anymore they just seem like a teen-aged girl's masturbatory fantasy instead of monsters.

[Curtland1015]

1. I had this exact same rant fest at work a couple of weeks ago.

Vampires are nothing but romance novel crap now.

I miss my scary vampires.

:cry:

[Danger Mouse]

2. Blame Ann Rice.

[VMI Dem]

3. Read "30 Days of Night".

[Swede]

4. I just picked up They Thirst by Robert McCammon

Time to read it again.

A friend of mine lives in Los Angeles and asks me why I hate his city. I don't hate L.A., but it scares the hell out of me, even without vampires. My first sight of his city, from the airplane, was a sprawling urban wasteland unlike anything I've ever seen in my life. I mean, the place is huge. I grew up and live in a city that hasn't yet reached a million population, so you might imagine my reaction when I saw the Los Angeles area for the first time. It was a beautiful day: the sun shining, the traffic buzzing around, people going on about their lives.

But somewhere, just off the glittering neon-mad Strip, there's a dark basement where men do terrible things.

The Land of Eternal Youth. Disneyland. Movie stars and "A" lists. Gangs fighting for survival on the mean streets. The ghosts of memory, and dark halls where Valentino once walked. The "big break," and people who will sell their bodies, souls, and minds to get through one more day of that hard, golden sunshine.

I think a Vampire King would find Los Angeles a wonderland. He would know that such a beautiful beast has a huge dark belly. And in that darkness, surrounded by pallid forms who fall at his feet in worship, even a Vampire King might become a star.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

5. Was Barnabas Collins lame? tortured, yes. Lame?

[LostInAnomie]

6. Yeah, he was actually kind of lame and wimpy.

Compare him to Stoker's Dracula, or Nosferatu and he was a total wuss. That being said, he's infinitely cooler that most of the Vampire stories in the last 20 years.

[Tuesday Afternoon]

8. yeah. Quentin was the real bad ass of Dark Shadows

:toast:

[rcrush]

7. Forever Knight, Angel and Buffy

The only vampire shows I could get into.

[Orrex]

9. When authors became more interested in creating sympathetic vampires than interesting monsters.

Vampires can be portrayed as interesting while still being monstrous, but nowadays the sympathetic "vampire with a heart of gold" stereotype is so overdone that it makes the entire vampire concept seem lame.

[HiFructosePronSyrup]

10. Around Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Keep in mind, I've only seen the episode where John Ritter is an abusive stepdad robot. But the vampires in the commercials were just fucking stupid.

[WorseBeforeBetter]

11. Forget teen-aged girls, I work with a 30-year-old MS-level researcher...

whose cube is a SHRINE to Robert Pattinson. She even maintains a fan-girl blog. (And wonders why she can't get a date...)