Dear Skinner and Mods,

[LeftyFingerPop]

As we discussed and agreed to as a condition of my continued membership at DU, I am submitting my bi-weekly posting schedule for the month of July for your pre-approval. Thank you.

July 1 - call taterguy a dumbass

July 2 - tell other DU members to shut their fucking pieholes

July 3 - posts that have no swear words

July 4 - posts that use multiple variations of the word "fuck"

July 5 - posts that have idiotic statements that I have posted a million times before. (Examples "Shave first, ask questions later" and "Speed always beats power, unless power is speedier").

July 6 - ask for vibes

July 7 - post 100 Grateful Dead youtube videos in a 24 hour period

July 8 - monkey posts

July 9 - do posts where people have to scroll to the bottom, only to find one or two words there.

July 10 - posts that have no body, only a subject, and without an "n/t" in the subject.

July 11 - One word posts that have no meaning (Example: "Shoe")

July 12 - posts that have a dot in the subject line, and simply the sideways tongue smilie in the body.

July 13 - posts that complain about the rolling eyes smilie

July 14 - day off

[SoxFan]

1. +pi

[LeftyFingerPop]

5. Would you please join me in the war on drugs?

[SoxFan]

10. I only wage war on amoxicillin, loratadine, and strawberry-infused opium

[LeftyFingerPop]

12. Drugs are for people who can't face real estate agents.

[Dr. Strange]

2. You need to switch July 6 and July 9.

I have a hair appointment on the 14th.

[LeftyFingerPop]

6. Which hair?

[Dr. Strange]

13. The long one.

[LeftyFingerPop]

14. Size doesn't matter.

[Dr. Strange]

16. Thanks, Yoda.

Now switch the dates.

[Dr. Strange]

17. OMG, I double-posted.

Stupid New DU. x(

[BlueCollar]

3. July 28 is still when you transfer all your money to my account right?

You promised...

[LeftyFingerPop]

8. You're thinking of someone else. I have no money.

[SunnySong]

4. You forgot the post where you are explaining in

excruciating detail why you will not be posting anymore.

Also an all serial killers are republicans post then get all flustered when someone mentions Jim Jones and them announce your new ignore list.

[LeftyFingerPop]

9. I won't be posting anymore.

I won't be posting any less either.

[Moondog]

7. Dude. July 14th is Bastille Day. You CAN'T take the day off.

You are a leader of the peasant revolution. Viva 'l whatever! Etc.

[LeftyFingerPop]

11. Viva-A-Go-Go.

[Call Me Wesley]

15. NO swearing on Fourth of July,

no matter what.

And if you switch Grateful Dead with Oasis, you're pretty safe.

Looking forward to the monkey posts! Combine them with the taterguy posts and they'll be awesome!

[kentauros]

18. idiotic statements on July 5th is perfect

because that's X-Day for us SubGenii :D

[LeftyFingerPop]

20. Where have you been?

:hi:

[kentauros]

21. Actually trying to avoid DU

in case I get employed and am not so truly addicted to this place still :P

Been hanging out in the ASAH section mostly

[Kali]

19. scheduling

July 8, 12, and 13
penciling 11