How should we celebrate the peoplehood of corporations?

[yellowcanine]

Seriously, generally for people we celebrate birthdays, graduations, weddings, accomplishments, and finally, when they die, we celebrate them and mourn them. I see a whole new business opportunity here. We could have corporate birthday parties, wedding ceremonies for mergers (Can two gay corporations get married? - just asking, Mitt), and corporation funerals. Think of the possibilities!

[AsahinaKimi]

1. How about this...

We get the board of directors so drunk, that they pass out. Then bring in a crew to photograph them in funny positions wearing pink under garments...when they wake, those photos are on the front page in a morning edition of the special newspaper section entitled, "WELCOME TO MY WORLD!"

[Chan790]

7. Your world is stranger than mine.

Seriously, things like that never happen to me, around me or with my participation. That might be the random awesomeness of the week.

[undeterred]

2. Lets tell them the facts of life.

Some day you're going to DIE.

[femmocrat]

3. self-delete

sorry

[tabbycat31]

4. How about introducing them to our justice system

And I'm talking Texas style capital punishment for ones that repeatedly break the law.

[hobbit709]

5. Public wedgies.

[kentauros]

6. I think we should allow hazing just for corporations.

The more bizarre and potentially deadly, the better }(

What about Capital Punishment? ;)

[kimi]

8. Baptism

of the most outrageous and ridiculous and irreverent names possible!!

It could be a comedy bonanza!!

[RedCloud]

10. Make all religions subservient to them too:

Thou shalt hoard thy wealth
Thou shalt not hireth anybody but thou shalt be called a job creator.
Thou shalt not payeth taxes. Thou shalt receiveth subsidies.

[nolabear]

9. Circumcision.

[applegrove]

11. People do celebrate. It is called Republican won elections.

[rrneck]

12. Put 'em on the menu. nt

[krispos42]

13. Cremation?

Of their incorporation papers, of course.

[dembotoz]

14. register for the selective service

[dembotoz]

15. only 1 vote

and campaign contributions only for a single giver

[geardaddy]

16. Spanking machine at birthday times.

Older sibling corporations allowed to boss them around and make them change the channel.