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Top 11 post-election uses for an electronic voting machine.

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ebayfool Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-05-04 01:26 AM
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Top 11 post-election uses for an electronic voting machine.
Sat. nite funny, found in my current issue of Network Computing, had to see if it was online - here it is.

http://www.nwc.com/showitem.jhtml?docid=1522lastmile

Top 11 post-election uses for an electronic voting machine
Nov 11, 2004 | By Brad Shimmin and Tim Wilson
--------------
11) At last, a true random-number generator for people engaged in Brownian noise research
10) SimCity political training device for the losing candidate
9) Full-time opinion polling station--better than bouffant-sporting soccer moms with clipboards
8) Florida Lottery terminal--guaranteed never to pick a winner
7) Integrated into the SETI network--could speed up the search for intelligent politicians in the universe
6) Training device to teach students how to operate the cash register at McDonald's
5) New personal device to tally Windows security vulnerabilities
4) Tie-down anchor for Florida mobile homes
3) Weighted and biased secure linear congruential random number
generator simulator (WBSLCRNGS)
2) Alternate method for ordering fast food at the drive-through. No miscommunication, and your order will still be wrong
1) Install Linux on it, then donate it to a school or library. Kids need to learn how to hack--I mean, vote

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DeepGreen Donating Member (572 posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-05-04 01:29 AM
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1. Low Tech biased Crystal Ball !!!
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OneBlueSky Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-05-04 01:33 AM
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2. paperweights . . .
big, ugly Republican paperweights . . . and every member of Congress should be required to keep one prominently displayed on his or her desk . . . just as a reminder . . .
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aquart Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-05-04 01:48 AM
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3. Not chained to their ankles?
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ebayfool Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Dec-05-04 01:49 AM
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4. just as a reminder ... or hung around their necks on a pretty chain.
Just as a reminder!
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