Mr. President... I'll be your War Czar. Really.

[ncteechur]

Since you cannot seem to find someone to fill the vacancy, I'll be glad to do it. I have worked in administration for about 10 years and am considered to be quite educated. It would be my pleasure to serve as War Czar provided that I understand the job description correctly. I would have an almost free hand in conducting the wars in Afghanistan and in Iraq. I would answer only to you and would not be interfered with by Condi Rice, Dick Cheney, or Bob Gates. I could move men and equipment around as I see fit to prosecute the wars. I'm your man.

However, I guess I should state that I will begin bringing our troops home as soon as I begin my tenure. I will make sure all repairs at Walter Reed and other medical facilities are expedited. I may even have fire Haliburton to do so. They won't be needed overseas because we will be coming home ASAP. I mean, screw Haliburton! I certainly will not pay them since they want to move to Dubai so badly. I have many other ideas which we can go over during an interview.

Of course, compensation is important. I want to earn the same amount as Karl Rove since what I will do is infinately more important than anything he has ever done. I will also require that you present me with the Medal of Freedom at some point before you leave office.

Thank you for your consideration.

[waiting for hope]

1. OMG - After the first paragraph,

I thought you were panning Donald Rumsfeld....then I read the rest and realized you are a sane and capable individual.;)

[NanceGreggs]

2. Response from White House

Dear Applicant:

We have reviewed your request to be considered as a candidate for the position currently available.

It is obvious from the tone and content of your letter that you possess intelligence, common sense, and an ability to approach problems with a view to solving them rather than exacerbating them.

In view of the aforementioned, it is apparent that you would not fit in well with the rest of the administration team.

Thank you for your interest. Should you become incredibly dumber over the next few weeks, please feel free to apply again.

Yours Truly ...

[ncteechur]

4. Damn! :-( eom

[irish.lambchop]

3. Excellent idea!

And I nominate Thom Hartmann to fill in for tony snow while he’s recuperating; Patrick Fitzgerald to replace alberto gonzales when he goes; and Sam Seder to replace imus.