How many Clintonites does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

[Nia Zuri]

ANSWER: THAT'S NOT FUNNY!

[anigbrowl]

1. Bwahahahaha!!!!

[Dinger]

2. Glad You WASTED A Post On That

Nice move ace.

[madeline_con]

4. But the internet is infinite. n/t

[ithinkmyliverhurts]

7. Yeah, take that. Whatever will you do with your life for these next 23 hours.

Oh, the pain, the angst. Posts in the wind; all we are is posts in the wind.

Christ almighty.

[stop the bleeding]

11. .

:rofl::spray:

[Danger Mouse]

23. you're on fire tonight.

[NaturalHigh]

32. I thought it was a great use for a post.

Better than all the "my candidate rocks, yours sucks" drivel that make up approximately 99% of GDP.

[annie1]

3. LOL! :D

[Jackpine Radical]

5. Two.

Assuming they can find a way in.

[kevin881]

6. REAL ANSWER:

Clintonites do not screw in lightbulbs... they SPIN THEM in.

[EmperorHasNoClothes]

14. LOL!!

:rofl:

[Thurston Howell III]

35. DUZY!

[FlyingSquirrel]

40. Can't get a DUzy in a thread if it's locked

This one's .. um, spinning out of control

[IDemo]

8. Answer: "We feel more and more Americans are willing to embrace darkness"

[mahina]

36. bwahahah!

[HooptieWagon]

9. screw is sexist!!!

besides, they're all wearing blinders - who needs light?

[ithinkmyliverhurts]

10. Screw????

Yeah, you'll have to check Black's Law Dictionary on that one.

[HooptieWagon]

13. I thought we were using the Clinton Dictionary

you know, the one that defines "positive campaign" as get down in the mud, "count all the votes" as count only my votes, "no sexual relations" as blowjobs, and is somewhat murky on what the meaning of "is" is...

[Kurt_and_Hunter]

12. Nice seeing the old feminist jokes recycled as Clintonite jokes.

(The traditional form of that joke was "how many femminists..." or sometimes, "How many lesbians...")

[EmperorHasNoClothes]

16. Oh, FFS.

Everyone on this board has heard that joke with a million different subjects. Not EVERYTHING is sexist.

[PetraPooh]

45. Actually I heard this joke in 1968 as an Aggie joke, so you're just spinning

[bilgewaterbill]

15. Answer:

#1 - They don't screw in a lightbulb, they screw in...The Oval Office (alt- Lincoln Bedroom)
#2 - They don't screw in a lightbulb, screwing is done by INTERNS!
#3 - They don't screw in a lightbulb, they make the lightbulb CHANGE!

[EmperorHasNoClothes]

17. None. They let Obama screw in the lightbulb, then say they did it.

;)

[scheming daemons]

18. EXACTLY.... they have no sense of humor...... it's clear now...

...

[Mooney]

19. Light bulbs don't count. n/t

[earthlover]

20. ANSWER: ONE....to hold tightly to the lightbulb as the world revolves around him/her

[VolcanoJen]

21. Clinton has more experience with lightbulbs, this has been reported on again and again

}(

[rainbow4321]

22. Hillary asks "Why do **I** always have to be the first one to change the light bulb??" nt

[Moochy]

24. They dont screw in lightbulbs

Most have installed "The Clapper" back in the 1980's, and the light is always going off and on when they watch Hillary speak at rallies...

Point :hi: , Smile :7, Clap :applause: , Clap :applause: < :think: Lights go off > Smile :7 , Point :thumbsup:, Smile :D Clap :applause: etc. :cry:

:evilgrin:

[ithinkmyliverhurts]

25. Yes, we will!!!!!

Well, of course you will. It's a fucking light bulb.


Yes, we will!!!!!!


Yeah, I got it--light bulb. $1.69.




Yes, we will!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Obama just promised us that some day light bulbs will last 5,000 hours so that we have to change them less. His audience then started saying in response to this, "Yes, we can."



Yeah, well, shit in one hand, hope in another, and see how fucking it easy it is to change a light bulb. You know what happens? Huh? You get shit on your hands. It gets on the carpet. And in your hair. So you take your dreams of a light bulb that needs infrequent changing, shove it up the tooth-fairy's ass, and smoke a bowl of crack out of it with Santa. You mother-fucker, Keith Olbermann, you GE cock-suckers. I've been working 35 years to change this fucking bulb, and I won't be . . .

We interrupt this joke for a message from our sponsors . . .




6 years at war; 3 trillion dollars in debt; 47 million without life insurance; John McCain wants to know how you plan to light your household. Al Gore wants to rob you of your God-give American rights to club the fuck out of a seal to give your precious children the education our forefathers bled for . . .


American Idol.

[NaturalHigh]

26. I finally clicked on this post after passing over it a half-dozen times.

That's the funniest thing I've read all day.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[scheming daemons]

27. Hillary and McCain have the necessary experience to change the lightbulb....

...but all Obama has is one speech where he argued against screwing in the lightbulb in the first place.

[Johnny__Motown]

28. Just Bill, he'll screw anything

[scheming daemons]

29. Bubba: "I've screwed in lots of places, but I've never screwed in a lightbulb!"

[Johnny__Motown]

38. don't bet on it.

[PetraPooh]

46. LOL. Very good.

[FlyingSquirrel]

30. As many as it takes to screw Obama out of the nomination?

:shrug:

[ContinentalOp]

31. I did not screw in that light bulb.

[mahina]

33. Thanks, good one!

[gerrilea]

34. None, they get the repukes to do it!

:blush:

[bleowheels]

37. Do you mean, "Screw OVER a lightbulb?" In that case, she only screws over a lightbulb when...

it's an Obama lightbulb!

[IDemo]

39. What's the difference between a Hillary campaign and a lightbulb?

You can unscrew the lightbulb.

[superkia]

41. Well first they would have to hire cheap labor from one of our...

outsourced jobs, then point out how McCain could put the bulb in better than Obama and then spread some fear about people getting electrocuted by installing bulbs so they could secure some friends a big contract for replacing bulbs. So, allot!

[BigBearJohn]

42. Clintonites don't screw in lightbulbs - they screw in hot tubs.

[Taxmyth]

43. Why the new light bulb?

What happened to the other one? Are these energy efficient bulbs? Who was in the room when the light bulb blew out? Who else? What were they doing? Did what they were doing have anything to do with the light bulb burning out? How many light bulbs are in the room? Is there enough light without that one bulb to function efficiently or did the bulb have to be changed for safety reasons? How much did the bulb cost? Was the bidding process fair for these bulbs? What can we do to keep these bulbs burning longer? Who authorized the changing of the light bulb? Was the chain of command properly followed?

Sorry, I wanted to see how the traditional media would react to this.

[jgraz]

44. Let's see here...

A: None -- they never thought they'd have to change lightbulbs after February 5th

A: None -- They just blame the media for the darkness.

A: Three -- One to call the bulb a muslim, another to publish a photo where the bulb looks even darker and a third to endorse the old, broken bulb over the shiny new one. (note that it's still dark when they're done)

A: Three -- one breaks the new bulb, the other eats the old one and the third sticks his finger in the socket. Hillary pays them all 12 million dollars.

A: Is it in a caucus state? Then let the fuckers light a candle.