Have you ever had a really bad job interview?

[msallied]

I remember once being called in for an interview for a position that I thought was simply clerical. I had some experience answering phones, filing, running errands, using office equipment, data entry. Low level grunt type stuff. I was about 20. I saw an ad for a job in the paper that sounded like something I could do. It was a small construction office and the listed qualifications seemed to match mine. Computer literate, experience with data entry and phones. Hey, right up my alley, I thought.

I was called in for the interview and about two minutes in, I knew that I was in way over my head. I was asked what my knowledge was of payroll systems, how many years I'd had working with spreadsheets (at that time, I had nothing more than a class in high school on an ancient program), if I'd be able to put together PowerPoint presentations, etc etc. I was so embarrassed and so put on the spot. The ad for the job was poorly written and I have no idea what possessed the manager to schedule the interview given my resume was not all that great, but when I see Sarah Palin being interviewed by Katie Couric... I recognize that feeling. That rambling, BSing, glassy-eyed, platitude-wielding composure that can only come from someone who knows that they are out of their element and is going to just pull everything they can out of thin air to get through it.

Yes, I bullshitted my way through that interview, and I knew that I wouldn't get the job. And I knew that the boss knew. And I knew that he knew that I knew.

I guess what separates Sarah Palin from the rest of us who have had to bullshit our way out of a similar situation is that she doesn't know at the end that she blew it. I'm sure she has that same sort of anxiety during (because she is a horrible politician and probably an even worse poker player), but at the end, she tells herself that she did a great job and that she totally nailed it. She's like a delusional American Idol contestant.

[no_hypocrisy]

1. I applied for a teaching position in a public school system, and

the principal found a misspelling on my resume. Game over. Nowadays I would've been hired.

[msallied]

2. It appears that standards have gotten very lax with spelling and grammar.

I recently submitted a story for publication and caught a misspelling in my query letter. It apparently didn't faze the editor. I didn't know whether this was good or bad...

[Matariki]

3. Microsoft. End of interview, I was asked me to pick a number from 1 to 4.

I told them I thought their pseudo-psychological questions were ridiculous and left the interview. Funny thing though, I was offered the job. I didn't take it - didn't want to work for idiots.

[msallied]

4. Are you serious?? They did that? Oh my god!

Yeah, I don't blame you for turning down that job.

[Matariki]

24. Unfortunately yes.

I've contracted for Microsoft before and had a good time. It all depends on who is running the department. This particular group was a bunch of morons. That was the stupidest of the questions. They also had a programmer ask me questions unrelated to the job or anything on my resume - just to try and make me uncomfortable, I guess. It was obnoxious and I got testy with them. I was surprised when I was offered the job and was delighted to tell them to shove it ;-)

[av8rdave]

5. Had a bad scholarship interview once

I was a finalist for a full ride: Navy ROTC scholarship. I had to go to an interview in front of a bunch of Navy officers. There I was, a punk in a borrowed suit with long (really long) hair.

My mistake was being honest. They asked me what the last book I read was. I replied truthfully: "The Cain Mutiny," by Herman Woulk. Turns out that isn't the most popular novel among Navy brass. Oh well, at least I was honest!

Oh, btw...I didn't get the scholarship.

[msallied]

10. hahaha! The Cain Mutiny.

Just imagining interviewing in front of a panel of Naval officers gets me nervous!

[av8rdave]

15. Funny thing was...

They called me a couple of weeks later and said I could still go Navy ROTC, but just pay the whole thing myself. By then, I had a service academy appointment.

I told them what they could do with their suggestion. They didn't like that either.

[MorningGlow]

6. Yes, I applied for a teacher's aide position at a local middle school

I met with an entire PANEL of teachers and administrators who grilled me about my qualifications. The difference between me and Palin is that about 10 minutes into the interview, I said, "You know, I'm not the person you want in this position. It's not something I'm suited for or, quite frankly, interested in. I'm glad you called me for an interview, but I'm sorry I wasted your time."

My honesty got me a contract job on the spot, to direct the school play. I had a ball and made $2,000, IIRC.

[msallied]

8. That's fantastic!

It's my hope that Sarah won't have a similar attack of the conscience halfway through tonight's debate. I'd hate for her to get sympathy votes. lol

[MorningGlow]

18. I'd be up for it if she walked away

Just did one of her dead-air pauses and then said, "Ya know, Gwen, I dunno the eeaaanswer. And ya know (cocks head), I don't think I wanna eeaaanswer enny more. TYODD! Let's go fer a ride on the sno mushine!"

One caveat: She'd have to STAY away.

But I don't think she's smart enough to realize that she doesn't have what it takes to be VP...of anything. Including the PTA.

[David__77]

7. Oh yes, I blew it!

I'm an economist and I applied for a job that turned out to be an accounting position. It was unclear from the convoluted job description. I panicked during the interview for some reason. It was terrible.

Palin is so colloquial it hurts. A little calculated folksy charm is one thing, but she is over the top.

[boobooday]

9. I once had an interview on skid row in Los Angeles

I had to step over about a dozen sleeping homeless men to get to the place, which was in a building that was mostly abandoned and boarded up. I really needed a job, but in my white skirt and little pumps, I looked so out of place I ended up with a parade of bums behind me as I walked down Flower street. One of them was saying, "Lady, don't you know this is skid row?"

I'm not sure what the heck the business even was. It was two guys surrounded by boxes. They took one look at me and it was clearly no way. I needed a job so bad I was ready to take anything! I think they may have been drug dealers or smugglers or something. It was all very shady.

That was only one of many strange interviews I had in Los Angeles in the mid-eighties. ha. I also worked for a "legal services" company in Koreatown that defended the guys smuggling in the fake Louis Vuitton handbags.

[msallied]

13. Wow! Now that is fascinating. And scary...

I'm glad you got out of there okay. I've had a similar creepy experience interviewing on the bad side of town.

[boobooday]

23. Yeah, it was quite the culture shock

Considering I went from a town of less than 2000 in Indiana to downtown LA.

It was really a great experience, as hair-raising as it was sometimes!

[Fovea]

11. I had an potential employer

tell me in the middle of an interview that he was most proudest of the fact that all his programmers went with him to promise keepers meetings.

I was so desperate for work that I took the job, and lasted about three months of listening to Jars of Clay being played by my co-workers.

All it took was for me to tell them that the design they had paid an outside consultant for
was a steaming pile.

I took as shadenfreude fodder the fact that a half decade after I left, they still appeared to be struggling to make it work.
Last I heard they were down the tubes.

That, my friends, is the power of uncritical faith.

[LiberadorHugo]

27. Yuck. I hate that band and have never heard them in my life.

The biggest Jars of Clay fan I know was this hypocritical rightish Catholic who borrowed $5 from me when I was 14. The broad decided to spend the money on pot instead of pay me back on the date that we had arranged. I don't remember why I didn't keep hassling her for the money: I was very anti-pot at the time and wanted to strangle her. While I love weed and am strongly hostile to cannabis prohibition today and would put its advocates in re-education camps were it up to me, I still don't think high school kids like us at the time should be smoking it.

[firedupdem]

12. I've had a few I'm sad to say...and I knew right then and there

that I was not getting the job and that I was blabbering and bullshitting. The thing with Palin is....she's arrogant as hell! She thinks she's doing well.

[msallied]

17. I would just love to be a fly on the wall when she's alone.

Is she just sort of living in this bubble 24 hours a day, or is she a complete wreck when she doesn't think anyone is watching?

[CrispyQ]

21. The past few weeks, when she's alone,

I'll bet all she says is "I hate that Couric woman! I hate her! I hate her! I hate her!"

[Connie_Corleone]

14. I interviewed for a job I was not qualified for.

In fact, I didn't even know what duties were involved in the job. I BS'd my way thru it. But it was quite clear to the interviewers (2 of them) and me that I had no fucking idea what I was talking about.

At least I'm not stupid enough to apply for VP of the United States.

[msallied]

16. Yeah, it's that sort of arrogant stupidity in Palin that infuriates me.

She says she didn't "blink."

How many of us here, if we were approached with that sort of job, would answer an unequivocal yes? Hell, I could be offered the position of mayor of this town and I would still freak the hell out. I'm a writer who happens to love politics. That does not qualify me to even run a small city. lol

[remember2000forever]

19. I once applied for a job at a local Seaquarium. The interviewer asked if I was a Team Player.

Not knowing the "Buzz Word" I said that I probably could get along with Dracula if I had too. His eyes glazed over and then he asked me if I was afraid of seals. I said, trying to save the interview, "No". He then looked at me in disdain, knowing that I had never even met a seal up close. That look was the same as Katie Couric's look knowing Sarah is totally full of shit.

[crazylikafox]

25. Ok, call me stupid. But why is "team player" a code word?

I guess I've been out of the job market too long. I would have liked your answer.

[msallied]

26. A friend of mine is an HR guy and he says the same thing.

But I still don't get it. lol IT seems like a trick question to me.

[remember2000forever]

29. After finally going down the road to Corporate, I have come to understand that Team Player

means pitching in for the good of the company, no matter what your job description is. In other words, doing above and beyond for the good of the whole team. My Dracula answer insinuated that I could just manage to get along with the team.

[crazylikafox]

33. thanks

So your answer was correct, it just didn't go far enough. Corporate slavery & all that. I'll remember that when I go back to interviewing, which should be soon, given this economy.

[Avalux]

20. No. Got every job for which I've had an interview.

But I always knew what I was talking about - I know my stuff. Never tried to embellish or bullshit my way around a question.

[slackmaster]

22. I interviewed for a position as a medical illustrator once

Brought in my portfolio of technical pen drawings and sketches I had done while sitting through lectures in various undergraduate classes.

The interviewer politely told me I had some artistic talent, but he was looking for someone with actual experience.

[Bobbieo]

28. I lost a job interview becasue I am an Aries. The lady was an

an Astrology buff and apparently our birth signs were not compatible.
The way she saidd, "Oh! You're an Aries." Gave me a hint.

[slackmaster]

30. Egad, what a stupid thing for an interviewer to say!

That's begging for a discrimination suit. One thing I've noticed is that there are an awful lot of people who are totally unqualified to conduct interviews but do them anyway.

[ogneopasno]

31. I applied for a communications position with the state dem caucus...

...and the interview started off with me and about seven other people. They hadn't told me it would be a group interview, so that weirded me out at first. Then the lead interviewer said, "Why don't you just tell us your understanding of how a bill becomes law."

Now, I'm not a dumbass. I have almost 20 years of experience in writing and editing for newspapers, magazines, Web sites and so on. I know how to find information if I need it. I have, generally, a good handle on how government works. But that question made me feel like the biggest idiot out there, and it threw me off for the rest of the interview. It was embarrassing.

[Obamarulz11]

32. My interview with ConocoPhillips sucked complete ass

I interviewed with ConoccoPhillips for a summer job during college. I arrived at the office at appointment time. The receptionist escorts me to a room then hands me the Wonderlic test (I've taken it about 4 times prior avg score 44), and two personality tests. I completed those tests with ease. She comes back and get my tests and said "Come back into the lobby he will meet with you shortly."
I waited in that fucking lobby for 45 minutes, He comes out and said,"Its great to meet you, I call you." I was fucking furious. What a waste of time.

:grr: :grr: :wtf: :mad:

As a result, I decided to take classes full-time during the summer. Plus, it was a risk to my football scholarship at the time.