"Commander AWOL Bush, in his fare-thee-well kissoff speech, displayed The Very Best of Republicon Homelanderism, as he always does.
"Carrying the FAIL flag for Republicon Homelanders for the last time, Commander AWOL completely avoided reality, and added a delusional propaganda spin to make the last 8 years of corruption and incompetence sound just peachy.
"We at Faux News, the official Republicon Homelander propaganda organ, heartily applaud the pResident's chickenhawkery and prevarication. It was done in the finest tradition of Republicon Homelanderism.
"What can we say, except, Once Again: Mission (smirk) Accomplished (Smirk) Tough nuts to America and Americans. Homelanderism Uber Alles. Smirk."
- Faux News