Open Letter To Ted Haggard

[Lyric]

Dear Mr. Haggard,

There was a time when I felt nothing but contempt for you, and for other people like you. How can someone claim to have a heart full of Christian love, yet spout so much venom and condemnation toward their fellow human beings? I believed you to be a cruel man whose heart lacked any semblance of love, mercy, or compassion. In short--I despised you.

But I don't despise you anymore. What once was loathing has morphed into sadness for you. That's because I now realize that no matter how much I hated you, you hated yourself even more. I've seen that kind of self-loathing too much in my life to keep on condemning you for it now.

There is no doubt you caused your share of emotional harm to people like me. But I can forgive you that. I know what it's like to suffer in silence, too fearful of losing everything that you love, too frightened of disappointing the people who looked up to you, to be open and honest about who you really are. And you're not the only one. There are thousands upon thousands of other hurting souls out there who know exactly what you were going through. It's a terrible, heart-rending thing to have to conceal the truth of your existence for fear of alienating yourself away from everything comforting and familiar. It's only human to want to hang on to what you find security and safety in. Unfortunately, living a lie is one of the most painful, soulbreaking things a human being can feel forced to do. We are social creatures, and one of our deepest emotional needs is to have at least one person out there who really knows who we are. Someone we don't need to wear that chafing mask of social propriety in front of. All of the dogma and hellfire rhetoric in the world can't make this basic human need for companionship and acceptance go away. I guess you found out the truth of that the hard way.

For what it's worth, I hope that this upheaval helps you break free from the chains you wrapped around yourself for so many years. I know you're probably being judged and condemned by the people who once admired you. I know how painful that is, believe me. That's what drove me away from organized religion years and years ago. But I don't see my homosexuality as a curse. I see it as a gift. I'm not sure about Gods and religion, but I do believe that there is more to life than the endless countdown to death. We are born for more than just the grave. Unlike many others, I make no claims to know The Truth about this, but I have my own personal beliefs and opinions on the matter. And I know you have yours as well, so I'll speak to you on your terms.

Right now you probably feel like your whole life has been destroyed. If your notions about God are true, then this was God's will. If you had been living the life God meant you to have, He wouldn't have demolished it like this. This is not a punishment--this is YOUR gift. The gift of freedom, and a second chance to do the right thing. Will you take your gift with a thankful heart? Or will you continue to reject the life you were chosen for? That is something only you can decide.

In the meantime, I sincerely hope that things get better for you. You have fallen low, but in the end, that simply means that you have nowhere to go but up--clichéd, but nonetheless true. Now is the time for you to take a long, hard look at what you've made of the life you were given. How can you do things differently, and better? Perhaps if you make something better of your life, God will give you the greatest gifts of all: sincere empathy and unconditional love for your fellow human beings. Your redemption is waiting for you out here. If you want my advice--try some volunteer work at the local AIDS non-profit, or as a youth counselor for some of the depressed and suicidal gay youths in your community who desperately need to hear that they are worthy of love and acceptance.

~Brandy

[MnFats]

1. nice work! wonder if he'll take the time to read it...hope so.

and, hmmm, is it too much to ask that he take it to heart?

[Lyric]

3. I hope so, but...

...I have to say that I doubt it. I really do feel pity for him. I know I should be outraged, but there is a part of me that wants to show him that WE are better people than THEY are, capable of reaching out with compassion where others lash out with scorn. But I remember all too well what it was like to grow up in a fundie family and try to reconcile who I was with what I was taught to believe. It's hard--probably the hardest thing I ever had to do. But my family accepts me, and they love my partner as a second daughter, and I was blessed with a happy ending in that respect.

[davidinalameda]

2. Welcome to DU

I'm a former Morgantowner-did time at WVU

[Lyric]

4. Were you as heartbroken as I was on Thursday night?

I swear, the only happy things in this whole town were the sofas in Sunnyside. *sigh*

[davidinalameda]

7. yes I was

Thursday is my bowling night and I'm so glad that I didn't stay home and watch the game

I would have gone absolutely CRAZY

[Lyric]

9. I had to turn it off in the 4th quarter.

I just kept thinking, MAN, if this game was being played here in Morgantown, we'd have won--I *know* it. Our team is always so much better when they have 75,000 screaming WVU fans behind them to keep their rear ends in gear. *sigh*

[davidinalameda]

12. with the way the defense played

I doubt we could have won it at home

[dsc]

5. brilliant letter

I would love you to have a wider audience for this.

[Mike Nelson]

6. Brandy (You're A Fine Girl)...

I still don't care for Mr. Haggard; but, hope he takes your advice.

[Lyric]

8. Oh boy--THAT song xD

The story behind my name is actually even more embarrassing than that song. My Dad, a decorated Vietnam Vet, was celebrating my birth that night at the VFW with his old war-horse buddies, and the drink of choice that night was Ginger Brandy. I came *THIS* close to being named "Ginger Brandy" *laughs*

Thankfully my mother was merciful enough to intervene--she kept the Brandy, but dropped the Ginger. ;)

[TygrBright]

10. ocktoberain... This is a VERY Christian letter.

And if Pastor Ted is any kind of Christian at all, it cannot fail to resonate.

Unfortunately, having watched his weird, delusional interaction with Richard Dawkins I am very doubtful that he has really read and studied the Bible enough to absorb any kind of mature theology or spiritual insight from it at all. It appears that he regards it mainly as a useful tool to make others continue supporting his straight lifestyle and providing his shrivelled ego with the adulation it requires to enable him to function every day.

If that's the case, he's going to have to bounce a LOT harder before your very insightful, compassionate letter would have any effect.

I'm glad you wrote it, though. I could be wrong about him. I hope you send it to him.

appreciatively,
Bright

[Lyric]

11. I find your comment most interesting because

I am not the least bit "Christian" myself. I guess if I had to categorize myself, I'd choose Agnostic or vaguely Deist. I think there's *something* out there higher than you or I in this universe, but I have no idea what it is or if it's even aware that we're here. I certainly don't believe that there's a God out there who's personally concerned with my sex life (thank you Dave Barry).

My spirituality can be summed up very easily in three words--DON'T HURT OTHERS. Beyond that, I think it really doesn't matter much what people choose to believe. The only time I get upset about religion is when someone else is trying to use it as a bludgeoning tool to cause harm to me or the people I care deeply about.

[closeupready]

13. I would like to say

that there is nothing repulsive or dark about being gay. In fact, I rather enjoy it. It can be a burden keeping up, but well worth it.

[Democrats_win]

14. The Haggart affair shows why Christianity must give up homophobia.

This guy Founded this church; spent 26 years of his life working for it. What they did to him was not justice. They turned their back on him for being gay. Yet the homophobic agenda of the "christian" church is to put all gay Americans under this sort of justice. Wouldn't it be nice if the homophobic "christians" went into the closet to join the KKK and people who love could do so without false christians starting a witch hunt?

In the Bible the disciples asked Jesus how they'll know his true followers. The reply: you will know my followers by the love they have amongst themselves. Well, it sure doesn't look like they have much love amongst themselves in Haggart's church.