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LaurenG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 02:54 PM
Original message
Have you ever been shunned or threatened
or humiliated because you were on a "spiritual" path?
I use spiritual for lack of a better word. How often have you been accused of drinking the equivalent of koolaid by just being yourself?

I use to laugh all the time when I was a kid. I couldn't figure out why people acted so surprised at simple truths. I could read people and I didn't realize others just couldn't or wouldn't. I thought it was amusing when they were threatened by the truth and then they broke me by making fun of me, teasing me and condemning me calling me a witch. Figuratively and literally I was broken. I remember wanting to go "home" because they were so mean. I ignored most of what I got for a very long time after that. The day I married my now ex-husband I asked for a divorce because I knew it was wrong. My family was furious and so I stayed for many years in the wrong relationship.

The problem was all the social, familial and tribal rules. They will tell you lies and say it's the truth. Very like what is happening today, openly, right in front of our faces.

I have been afraid to say who I am but I think that I must risk it no matter what. Step out of the closet and let them once again call me witch. As above, so below. Whatever is brewing on the inside is also brewing on the outside. I think we had better allow ourselves to be whatever we are and embrace it, for I believe that there in lies the power to change this. Who else has had to overcome the stigma of just being you?
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NMDemDist2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 04:16 PM
Response to Original message
1. hubby "reads" eyes/people too
and what we have found is people are drawn to us or repelled by us depending on where they are on the path.

but the short answer to your question is no, not really :)
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LaurenG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 04:36 PM
Response to Reply #1
2. Well thanks for the honesty
I am feeling particularly vulnerable and have made myself more so but decided to just get it out there. Whats the worst thing that can happen, it is what it is. :)
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NMDemDist2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 04:55 PM
Response to Reply #2
3. hubby has the same problem being too ungrounded (open) to outside
energy. I taught him to grow a "tail" when he's feeling like that.

he loves dragons and seems to have a guide that appears like that so I told him to visualize a dragon's tail growing out the bottom of his spine that drags the ground. others I've suggested this technique to have used cat tails or peacock feather tails

use whatever type "tail" appeals to you, visualize it dragging the ground attached to the bottom of your spine and see if it helps keep you a bit more grounded and less vulnerable

:hug:
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LaurenG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 05:17 PM
Response to Reply #3
4. Thank you for the advice
I used to imagine mirrors surrounding me and wearing emotion proof raincoats and light bubbles. Now I just have to shut it off consciously. I like the dragons tail, it's much more powerful than the monkey tail that never seemed to work for me. I truly appreciate your input. I am using your version as I type. :loveya:
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Why Syzygy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-24-05 11:43 AM
Response to Reply #4
20. Topaz
is another option. The color and/or stone makes things invisible.
I visualize Topaz when I think there may be danger near. I did this once in a very practical situation .. I had parked in a spot with a broken meter, did not want to get towed, but needed to take care of important business for a couple of hours. I enclosed my car in Topaz. Suddenly, I saw the color everywhere, a "wet floor" sign, someone with a Topaz shirt, someone else carrying a Topaz stuffed animal, a backpack, etc. Confirmations. No towing or ticket that day.
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smirkymonkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-21-05 12:01 PM
Response to Reply #1
9. I find the same thing.
The more attached to the material world people are, the more they stay away from me. It used to be painful because so many people ARE attached to the material world - I am to an extent as well - but now I realize that I do not want or need people who are not on the path in my life, so it's really a blessing in many ways.
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FreedomAngel82 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 06:49 PM
Response to Original message
5. Aw
I'm sorry you were laughed at. I think it's a gift. :hug:
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tanyev Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 07:47 PM
Response to Original message
6. I had an "evil" boss for several years.
Things were very rosy with him in the first year, but went steadily downhill from there. From the beginning I could tell he was more bluster than sense, but once I had learned the job I never really let it bother me. I enjoyed the work and as long as he left me alone to do it, I was fine.

Every new person he hired he tried to turn against me, but it never worked because I was the one working with them every day, teaching them what to do and supervising their work. I tried to resist the temptation to badmouth him personally, but I did make the effort to fend off as many of his crazy ideas as I could.

It deteriorated to where he gave me all 2's and a few 1's on the yearly evaluation. (And also one of the other employees he had tried to turn against me.) My first couple of years I had gotten all 4's and 5's, when I had nowhere near the experience.

Finally he decided it was time for him to leave the company and my life improved so much. It took me awhile to understand why he came to dislike me so, when I had never done anything to him. I really think it was because he could tell that I saw right through him and his bullying, blustering BS.

I get the same kind of vibes from George Bush as I did from that boss.
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suziedemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-21-05 08:42 AM
Response to Reply #6
8. I just quit a good job because of a horrible boss.
He also reminded me of Bush. He was a bit of a bully who managed through intimidation.

The hardest part of my life/work is dealing with people. I beat myself up about this all of the time. I can't imagine working for six years under the boss you describe. That is amazing!!! How did you do it?
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tanyev Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-21-05 03:45 PM
Response to Reply #8
11. Looking back on it, I'm not sure.
Edited on Sun Aug-21-05 04:16 PM by tanyev
There were several factors that combined to convince me that I was supposed to be there.

The job was in a field I hadn't really trained for (records management), yet I discovered I had a real aptitude for it. The hours allowed me to take on a part-time job in my real field, church music. I loved the job I found doing that at a church very close to where I lived. The two jobs formed kind of a symbiotic link, each allowing me to do the other, and in return making a comfortable living. (Comfortable in comparison to what I earned my first few years on my own.)

Evil boss wasn't completely insane. He had some good ideas; he knew his way around a computer--everything I know about computers comes from what I picked up on that job and I knew that was valuable knowledge. He had a terrible habit of promising the moon to every department we handled. We didn't have the resources to fulfill all his promises, but he never wanted to hear that. He loved to call us all in for "meetings" that turned in to at least an hour of him enjoying hearing himself talk. We all learned to walk quickly past his office door with a sense of purpose on our faces or we would get sucked in for our own agonizing, time-wasting, confab. That improved greatly when he moved his office across the hall.

It took me a while to realize that he had a lot of antagonism directed toward me personally. There was so much work to do that I was focused on that. One of the women I became close to finally told me that when she started, evil boss had asked her to keep an eye on me and report back to him. Ha! She had nothing to report! This woman was older, not very comfortable with computers, and it took a lot of patient guidance from me to get her up to speed. She finally saw through him, too.

The last couple years he was there I did keep an eye out for other jobs, but there was nothing in that company I could transfer to which would pay as well. I submitted my name to my church denomination for a full time music position, even had a couple interviews much closer to where my family lived, but did not get offered either job.

So I resigned myself to staying. I don't have a confrontational nature. I am classic passive-agressive; maybe that helped me cope. I think one of the things that finally propelled him out the door was that he created an assistant manager position and ended up hiring a real firebrand. The position itself was a bit of a slap in my face. My official job title was not assistant manager, but that was how he had treated me when he first hired me. When he created the position, there was nary a word from him inviting me to apply. And I knew better than to apply.

So he ended up with a confrontational woman in the position and in her first few weeks kept sending her to me with questions about what I did and why was I doing it. I always had a good answer for her. Pretty soon she and I made a good working team and she had no problem going over to his office and telling him off.

This may be a lot more than you wanted to know, but the point is: sometimes karma takes awhile to come around, but it's really sweet when it does.
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suziedemocrat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-21-05 07:00 PM
Response to Reply #11
13. I admire your patience and quiet will. I could learn a lot! eom.
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smirkymonkey Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-21-05 12:03 PM
Response to Reply #6
10. People who are living a lie despise those who see them
clearly. I have had many of the exact same kinds of bosses, the more I came to know of thier shortcomings - which were many - the more they turned against me.
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bliss_eternal Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sat Aug-20-05 10:16 PM
Response to Original message
7. Um, yeah...
Where should I start?

I was the same ethnicity as the majority of my neighborhood, family, friends, etc. growing up, yet my race was always questioned because I didn't behave,speak or looked just like everyone else.

Most of my women friends, are women much older than I am--as I seem to be more of an 'old soul.' Seldom do women my age, get me.

My dh says I may intimidate others. He says there is something about me, my presence the way I talk and carry myself that some people for some reason find disarming. :shrug: I don't see it... he says I am very honest to the extent of being blunt.

So taking all I've said into consideration, yes. Definitely, I've been shunned and still experience this. I'm sloooowly learning to place myself among those that I have more in common with--and to stop taking on people that tend to see me as 'odd', unusualy or weird.

Hope this is helpful. Sorry I don't have more to offer. I'm having a tough time of this lately myself. :hi:
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LaurenG Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Sun Aug-21-05 05:12 PM
Response to Original message
12. To all of you who shared your information
Thank you so much. It is so helpful to hear other's experiences. Somehow it puts the hard parts into perspective. I was losing that and feel much more grounded.

I was really thinking I wasn't on the correct planet here for awhile. Thank you all for taking the time to nurture me through your kind responses. :grouphug: :loveya:
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BelleCarolinaPeridot Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-23-05 01:10 PM
Response to Original message
14. Yes I am going through it now ...
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DemExpat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-23-05 03:14 PM
Response to Original message
15. By my father.....
Edited on Tue Aug-23-05 03:17 PM by DemExpat
hard-nosed, Repub, ex-military and very practically minded Engineer with a capital "E"....:D..... had a hard time with my "dreaminess" and would chastise and belittle me many times while I was growing up to stop dreaming and come "down to earth"....
It would hurt me at the time, but it also certainly didn't "help"..... :silly:

Luckily in those early years I had a very spiritual grandfather whose loving influence on me was much greater than my critical Dad's, so this saved me, I am certain.

:hug:

DemEx

edit: It hs taken almost a lifetime, but I can now completely accept that "half" of humanity will possibly disapprove of what I think, feel, do, and am, while the other half will accept and perhaps even like my 'package'.



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Proud_Lefty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-23-05 03:31 PM
Response to Original message
16. I had a horrible, but wonderful experience years ago
Almost 20 years ago, my world was falling apart. Everything I valued and worked towards was slipping away from me, leaving me virtually empty and desperate. I went without sleep for days and found myself stuck on high on my own adrenolin. So many strange things started happening to me during this time. I began seeing things I never saw before and knew other people weren't seeing. I was so young and stupid, I openly shared with anyone and everyone everything that was happening to me, and I was quickly thrown in a psychiatric hospital.

I heard voices in my head, saw writings on the walls, and was lead by people I never met before who knew exactly what was happening to me. I was treated like dirt by the professionals. People lied about conversations they had with me, and my family insisted I trust these evil professionals. No one listened or believed me that I was being over-medicated and humiliated, even punched in the nose.

As I was going through this, though, spiritually I was being made aware that my social skills needed to be broken down completely before I would be able to even start to understand the spiritual existence being exposed to me. I still knew what sounded normal and even giggled to myself often how silly I sounded when answering questions, but I wanted to go far out of the box and see as much as I would be allowed while given the opportunity.

I experienced something I value to this day, and feel privileged to having been shown something many people will never see, at least on this plane, but it was hell being treated the way I was while I was going through it. When people don't understand, instead of trying to understand, they attack. I took delight in knowing how shallow their lives will remain with their attitudes.

Shortly after that, I went back to the world we all know and few people are even aware that I ever had a breakdown. But it kept me out of the box and able to continue to see things outside the box, where I will always remain. More to see out here and the people are much nicer.
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DemExpat Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-23-05 03:48 PM
Response to Reply #16
17. I agree, Proud_Lefty....
Edited on Tue Aug-23-05 03:56 PM by DemExpat
those who have truly made it outside of the box are much nicer, wonderful people.

I have little (read: "NO") room in my life for those who have not gone through this learning experience in one life or another.

:-)

I can relate to your experiences - had similar ones myself in my 20's.
Excruciating at the time, but oh so educational and highly valued now!

:hug: :grouphug:

DemEx
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Proud_Lefty Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Tue Aug-23-05 03:54 PM
Response to Reply #17
18. Thanks.
Edited on Tue Aug-23-05 04:35 PM by Proud_Lefty
It's really good to share, especially with this group. I'm sorry you went through it as well. It's so difficult to go through, but well worth what you get out of it.

:grouphug:

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Why Syzygy Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-24-05 11:39 AM
Response to Original message
19. Here
I finally embraced my Paganism five years ago. At first it was uncomfortable. Now it's a true Pleasure.

Many don't understand. They want traditional rules, rituals, finite answers. These do not exist for me. I know I'm the bravest in the "crowd". Making fun of others for being different is a coward's stripe. I pity them.
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hvn_nbr_2 Donating Member (1000+ posts) Send PM | Profile | Ignore Wed Aug-24-05 12:35 PM
Response to Original message
21. This topic reminds me of an insightful cartoon I once saw
The cartoon showed a person on the ground in a straightjacket, obviously considered crazy. Above him, levitating above a branch of a tree was a guru type in a guru robe, sitting in a typical meditation posture in the air.

The guy on the ground asks, "So why is it that you're up there while I'm bound in this straightjacket down here?"

The guru responds, "I know when to keep my mouth shut."
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