What is happening? Just really need a hug please

[arikara]

I'm really feeling down tonight. Sorry this is such a long story but there isn't any way to shorten it.

I just got accepted for this small business funding and training that I've been working really hard towards for the past few months. This was good news because it will pay the bills while I set up my business.

I'd mentioned before in this forum about my husband falling through the roof of his shed and cracking ribs etc. Well he doesn't have the sweetest disposition at the best of times and he's been an absolute bear since his accident. Cranky, whiney, rude and demanding. So we've been rubbing each other wrong lately because I don't take kindly to being treated inconsiderately.

Our littlest cat, a very timid male started peeing in wrong places around the house... mats, shoes etc. He did it for a week or so then it stopped. Then it started back up again. So I made a vet appointment but I was sure that it wasn't physical because he's young and playful. There has been a stray around that for some reason has worried him and I thought that he was feeling insecure and marking his territory.

Yesterday morning, we bundled up the little cat for his vet appt. Hubby picked up the carrier and I told him that I would take it. He asks why and I told him because he bangs into things and it scares the cats. He totally flipped out, roaring around and swearing at me and calling me names. I tried calming him down but he kept it up and all of a sudden I just boiled over and got so furious that I yelled at him that I hated him, slammed the door and took the cat to the vet myself. I've never said that to anyone and I totally meant it at that moment. Not that I hated him, but I hated how he was behaving.

It turns out that kitty has crystals in his urine and was nearly blocked. He had to spend the night in the hospital and has to go on a special diet for the rest of his life. Today hubby is still wound up and he's decided to leave because I told him I hated him. It doesn't bother him that he says awful things to me all the time however. He packed a bag and says he is going to sleep in his truck of all things. He's 57 years old, has a heart condition and is diabetic. I'm sure to get a call from the hospital in a day or 2 because he always mixes up his medications and insulin.

I was so upset yesterday that I missed the third part of a 3 section workshop on bookkeeping and now I have to do the entire 3 day course again. This particular class is so boring and I have to drive an hour each way to get there. Actually, after all my work now I don't know if I will even be able to finish the terms of my agreement. If we don't work this out I'll have to sell the house and move... I'm not going to stay around here so there will go my funding. I suppose I'll just continue on for awhile and see what happens.

Right now I just can't talk to friends or family about what happened, I don't even know what to say, the whole thing seems so bizarre. I don't know even if he sorts himself out if I want him coming home again. I think it has a lot to do with his diabetes, but its still way too hard to live with a miserable SOB regardless of what the cause is.

Oh yeah... and a rodent has moved into the wall and I can't find where its getting in but it starts scratching around at 2 AM. I'm going to have to call in an exterminator I guess so I can get some sleep. Oh... and my daughter is going through bad times with her husband too and is seriously thinking of leaving.

I just can't even figure out what is going on. I could really use some hugs though, and maybe some Reiki if any one feels like sending it... my neck is all stiff probably from stress.

[Delphinus]

1. When it rains, it pours.

My heart holds you - and Reiki is on the way. :hug:

[Sanity Claws]

2. Hugs, hugs

What an awful few days. I'm not much of an astrologer but it does sound like you have some really difficult transits going on.
I can't offer advice or help on anything except maybe the rodent in the wall. Instead of an exterminator, go to Home Depot or a similar store and get some small machine that emits sounds that will drive the rodent away. Usually you find it in the garden section. It's a lot cheaper than calling an exterminator and it does work. It's gotten rats out of my attic.

[arikara]

7. Thanks for the reminder, I have one of those things

I just repositioned it. Hopefully that will chase the bugger out. I don't like trapping them.

[Pathwalker]

3. Awww, I hate that for you!

Here's your hug! :hug:

I can give you some comfort on the kitty thing - my Beloved, Thunder had that problem, and he was fine! Just make sure you only give the kitty filtered water - all those minerals in water can be very hard on their little kidneys. We used distilled water, and it helped enormously!
Also, you can easily purchase cat food that is specially made for urinary health, and it's not that expensive.

As for the cranky hubby thing - I feel for you. Been there, done that. Men make lousy patients, due to their lack of patience, expecially when they hurt.

Sending some good energy your way!

:hug: :hug: :hug:

[arikara]

8. I've always given them filtered water

and high quality organic food. Now he has to go to a special type of food and its got byproducts in it. I'll have to look for some with better ingredients. Now that he's home, the other cat is hissing and being really miserable to the poor little guy.

Thanks for your support!

[Dora]

4. Wow, as bad as things sound

Your post is strong, your voice is clear.
:hug:

[Metta]

5. The patterns are in your (plural) extended families.

You're overwhelmed. You have no one to talk with and get things off your chest so you over react instead of appropriately letting off steam in individual situations and you have no support. I can't, for the life of me, see why you'd blow up in that kind of situation. :~>

Ever thought of counseling? Family therapy comes to mind. You and your husband for sure. Daughter and her husband also would be helpful to the entire family not just those attending.

[loudsue]

6. Solutions will present themselves, as the times dictate...

You'll see what you need to do to solve some of these problems.

:grouphug: I'm sending you a ((((((BIG HUG))))), and I sure know what it means to have everything kick up a storm all at once. :hug:

Your hubby might be overreacting a little, because he prolly knows that he needs you more than you need him, in too many ways. My dad was like that, and he'd react the same way toward my mom, as you described your husband acting toward you. It's immature, but a lot of men (more often than women) don't know how to handle their emotions, or their vulnerabilities, very well -- they just don't know what else to do with them, except act out. Sometimes talking helps, sometimes it doesn't.

I hope things even-out for you real soon, and that peace is restored to your soul. O8)

:kick:

[arikara]

9. Thanks for all your hugs and support

I'm sure that everything will turn out the way it should. Its just a hard night tonight.

I'm eating some chocolate.