So...what do you do when you're not oppressing Christians?

[Fenris]

Because, as we all know, that occupies most of our time, what with the oppressing and all that. Oppressing religious people is damn hard work, people! But damned if we don't somehow pull through with enough time to enjoy the finer things in life.

I myself take pride in my collection of preserved fetuses. And - when I'm not denying Christians their rights - I am a bit of a microbrewer. All of my beers are made out of hops, barley, and the blood of Christian virgins.

:sarcasm: <---Ordinarily, this goes without saying, but not after this week.

[Az]

1. I stand on street corners and harangue people about the use of reason

I am also a highly placed member of the Evil Atheist Conspiracy(EAC) which means I have to provide my services for weekend training camps once a month. Those black helicopters don't fly themself.... yet.

[Gelliebeans]

3. btw everybody

got their rubber chickens and beads except me :+

who do I take this complaint up with ???

;)

[beam me up scottie]

4. Onager's in charge of the rubber chickens

and anti-rapture helmets.
Aren't they nice?

on edit: (don't talk to beetwasher, you won't believe what he wants us to do to get the chickens!)

[Gelliebeans]

5. I've learned that

beetwasher can be quite cheeky ;)

in the meantime, I send a self addressed stamped envelope to onager with my color preference for my beads.
:rofl:

[onager]

7. Don't do that!

Jebus! What's the use of having a S00per-secret organization if you're going to send me SASE's?

Communicate with EAC thru the website. Look for the "Top Secret Encryption" button on the page. They move it around a lot. It may be disguised as a link to Landover Baptist or something.

Or you might try to find me at a hotel, where I'll be replacing the Gideon Bibles with "The 120 Days of Sodom." (Equal time and all that.)

I've started with the Marriotts. They have the best Rewards program.

[Gelliebeans]

16. lol

;)

[Gelliebeans]

2. I usually

read non-fiction.

I don't like those made-up stories :evilgrin:

[orleans]

6. oh, gee, let's see.....

mostly i'm just oppressing them because i find that it is a very valuable way to spend my time.

when i'm not oppressing them i tend to be bitching and moaning about them

especially the last couple of days. and after justice sunday i say we have a call to arms and really let the oppression begin!

[zippy890]

8. I have abortions as often as possible

and when there's a "2 for the price of 1" at the clinic I'll talk a friend into going for one.

and if i can't get a friend to go get an abortion with me, I go out and find some unsuspecting women and force her to go to the clinic with me.

I take my 'oppressing Christians' very seriously, as you know we all do in our satanic dark hearts.

Time to go get an abortion, I can't wait.

:evilgrin:

[gollygee]

10. Yes, me too - I promote Recreational Abortions

I'm thinking of starting a Recreational Abortion (RA) Clinic. Women can come in groups and have special RA parties for birthdays, wedding showers . . . probably not baby showers though.

[zippy890]

11. Oh I'd love to join of course

because its so much fun, the procedure and everything, and we want everybody to experience it!

[trotsky]

14. "probably not baby showers though"

LMFAO
:rofl:

[Discord]

23. I try to contribute my part to the abortion quotas

usually I do most of the work during the drug-laced orgies, but sometimes I can break tradition and offer up a non-event abortion with the right levels of intoxication.

I can't wait for the National Atheist Abortion Week Event!

All your freaks are belong to us!!!

[GOPFighter]

9. When I was younger...

...I used to desecrate churches, but now I burn Bibles stolen from the Gideons. I turn in missionaries to the IRS just to harass them. Another fun activity I engage in is to fill out those subscription inserts from Secular Humanist magazine in the name of the fundy preachers whose names I find in the phone book. I also have pornography sent to their children. Unfortunately, this doesn't leave much time to rip the Ten Commandments off walls and file off "In God We Trust" on every coin I get and block it out on all the bills. And if I have time, I cuss in front of kids.

Hey, I'm an atheist. Thats what we do, right? :evilgrin:

:sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: snarf! :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm: :sarcasm:

[Beetwasher]

12. I Build Crosses Of Course

Then I nail me some Xtian's to 'em.

Then I eat a baked apple.

[Fenris]

13. So many Christians...

So few lions. :evilgrin:

[trotsky]

15. Duh, I thought it was obvious.

When I'm not oppressing them, I'm trying to force them all out of the Democratic party so that we'll never win another election.

[beam me up scottie]

17. So YOU'RE the one

responsible for all of the "people of faith" leaving?
I shoulda' known...

Way to go Dude!
:woohoo: :applause: :woohoo:

[Rhiannon12866]

18. I don't oppress anybody. I just don't want to be harassed.

Actually, I'm fortunate. My family is Irish and Polish, and Catholic, no threat to anybody, since they are secure in their beliefs and not likely to stand on street corners and proselytize. When I see them, religion is not something we ever talk about, why would we? Catholicism has been around for far too long to even bother discussing it. My mother is the only one I have a problem with, since she's a control freak and I don't attend church with her. I don't know why she even bothers, since we've gone down this road since I was 15. But I "embarrass" her. I really don't think anybody who doesn't even know me cares. *sigh*

And I have nothing against Christians or Catholics. Hey, I'm liberal, and tolerant. And most of my friends and family, though Catholic, are liberal Democrats. My mother is the one exception.:-(

[progressoid]

19. I eat lots of re-fried beans, egg salad and cheap beer

then attend the church I want to offend the most...my bowels move in mysterious ways.

On off days, I change the words on their church signs to Carl Sagan quotes.

[trotsky]

22. progressoid wins.

:rofl:

[progressoid]

27. Just doing my part for the cause...

I wish. I'm way too respectful in public. Where does one take the 'Angry Atheist' classes? I need some training.

Next month, I'll be attending a family event for a weekend that is bound to be rife with praying, thanking god for stuff, etc. Hopefully no singing.

[Discord]

31. All ya gotta do, is be openly Atheist.

Even in uncomfortable situations. When you are inevitably attacked for being an Atheist, the Angry Atheist part will come naturally. :P

[neebob]

20. I don't have much time to oppress Christians

Sitting around blaming my parents for everything that's wrong with me and defending other people's spoiled, ungrateful children takes up most of my time. Promoting recreational abortions sounds like fun, though, and a good way to upset my mother.

[Taxloss]

21. I oppress Zoroastrians

And occasionally Parsis. But they're hard too find. Christians are everywhere.

[Discord]

24. Well, opressing Christians is generally part of just about

everything I do. I mean I don't feel right making a sandwich if I don't burn a Bible or stick a crucifix into the garbage disposal. Hey, it's a full time job ya know.

[beam me up scottie]

25. I dress like a nun

and go around seducing church elders, video taping the act and exposing their true lustful carnal nature by broadcasting it for all to see in church on the following Sunday.
I am single-handedly responsible for driving the divorce rate up over 50% in most of the red states.

Oh, and when I have some spare time I also like to use cherubs for skeet shooting.

[Discord]

32. cherubs for skeet shooting...

BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[beam me up scottie]

33. I HATE those

fat little f*ckers! :evilgrin:

[curse10]

26. I eat children and burn crosses

all in the days work of your friendly neighborhood atheist

[Brewman_Jax]

28. I'm just so busy...

worshipping cats, eating puppies, deflowering Christian virgins, wearing funny clothes and being naked under them, that I have trouble finding time to oppress Christians.

[Misunderestimator]

29. I've got my hands full, what with oppressing Christians and forcing the...

gay agenda down everyone's throat. :)

[beam me up scottie]

30. I'm glad to see

you've been keeping up with that.
It's a very important part of our plan to take over the world. :evilgrin:

[progressoid]

34. Wow

Destroying the sactity of marriage AND opreressing Christians. You have your hands full. Either one of these is a full time job. Don't burn yourself out!

[JNelson6563]

35. Since I like Christians

I tend to persecute them instead cause they prefer it. ;-)

Julie

[Discord]

36. Glad to see someone trying to be diplomatic.

Thats mighty kind of ya.

:P