Bush: Thousands Of Registered Democrats Needed For 'Extremely Important' Mission

[noahmijo]

WASHINGTON, DC—In a televised address to the nation Monday, President Bush announced that the U.S. is in "desperate need of thousands of registered Democrats" to conduct what he called an "extremely important mission" to begin immediately and continue at least until the first Tuesday after the first Monday in November.

This mission is absolutely vital, for the next week to 10 days will determine the future of our country," said Bush, who would not reveal what the operation entailed, only to say that it was "highly classified."

"We are calling on the most stalwart Democrats in the land," Bush said. "In fact, they are the only ones capable of making it a success."

http://www.theonion.com/content/node/54718

[niallmac]

1. I'm not sure why but The Onion tends to annoy me whereas

I found The National Lampoon of my younger days just too hilarious.
Could it be I have become a curmudgeon?

*** SNL...same thoughts...

[noahmijo]

2. Shut Up and report for duty. King Bush is calling on us

Admit it, you're annoyed by The Onion because you hate Jesus and Christmas. :)

[luckyleftyme2]

3. YES SIR MR PRES.

AYE AYE SIR I'M AN OLE WORN OUT VETERAN REPORTING FOR DUTY SIR; I MIGHT NOT BE THE MAN I WAS SIR,
BUT I'LL DIE TRYING!
TRYING TO REMOVE YOU FROM OFFICE,TAKE YOUR POWER AWAY,GET AS MANY OF MY PEERS TO VOTE DEMOCRAT AS I CAN SIR:
A PROUD AMERICAN VETERAN IS TELLING YOU ITS TIME TO SETTLE IRAQ.TO MAKE OUR ENEMIES AND OUR FRIENDS KNOW THAT WE ARE STILL A NATION OF THE PEOPLE BY THE PEOPLE AND FOR THE PEOPLE-AND WE DON'T NEED THAT MID-EAST OIL,WE JUST NEED A NEW ADMINISTRATION.

GO DMOCRATS,VOTE YOUR HEART ON TUES. NOV7TH
VOTE DEMOCRAT FOR CHANGE AND DECENCY

[niallmac]

4. Okay okay. I admit it. Jeeeeesh! n/t

[Ferret Annica]

5. Yes, you have become a curmudgeon

Shame on you. Now, remember to report to help our esteemed shaved chimp save the work as we know it from human life forms with common sense and intelligence. ;)