Humor break! (Or not...) Andy Borowitz: Electronic Voting Machine Slays Nine

[seafan]

Andy Borowitz: Electronic Voting Machine Slays Nine

Posted on Nov 3, 2006

The state of Florida was on high alert today as an electronic voting machine that was being tested in advance of next Tuesday’s midterm election went berserk and killed nine in a terrifying rampage.

The rogue machine, which Florida officials said was state of the art in touchscreen technology, was undergoing a routine test in Tallahassee when election workers observed that it was “behaving strangely.”
After a worker conducting the test touched the machine’s screen to register a vote for Democratic Sen. Bill Nelson, the machine registered 20,000 votes for his Republican challenger, Katherine Harris, and then started spewing smoke and sparks.

As election workers ran for cover, the voting machine became unmoored from the floor and began trampling everyone and everything in its path.
“It was freaky,” said election worker Carol Foyler. “It was almost like the machine was mad that someone tried to vote for a Democrat.”

The touchscreen terror then cut a swath of death and destruction across the state, despite attempts by the Florida state police to apprehend it.
Gov. Jeb Bush appeared on television later in the day to urge calm, telling citizens, “Clearly, Florida’s electronic voting machines are still very much a work in progress.”

snip

Elsewhere, in recognition of his invaluable contribution to the fall election campaign, President Bush awarded the Presidential Medal of Freedom to Sen. John Kerry (D-Mass).

[sce56]

1. Your sentiments are exactly what got me in trouble here back in 04

Kerry or Bush Skull & Bones win either way! Maybe he did it on purpose mangling that joke to give Rove the reason the flipped votes make sense after they electronically Diebold the elections

October 17, 2006,Will be remembered as the Enabling day of the 21st Century!
"The government will make use of these powers only insofar as they are essential for carrying out vitally necessary measures..."
~Adolf Hitler, March 23, 1933, before the German Parliament (Reichstag) as he urged them to pass his "Enabling Act"


Fascism Accomplished?

[Torgo Johnson]

2. You can't possibly be serious

Do you seriously think John Kerry wants the House and Senate to stay in control of the Republicans? Who do you think he is, Joe Lieberman??? I have read some pretty ridiculous things on this forum, but your comment really takes the cake.

Also, what does your reply even remotely have to do with the original post? What are his/her sentiments? It was a satirical article. Except for the cheap shot at the end, it mostly had nothing to do with Kerry.

[sce56]

3. I can only say one thing Skull & Bones nothing else matters!