Ted Haggard will now undergo 3 to 5 years(!) of "spiritual restoration".

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

Complete with "laying on of hands" by "overseers".

And check out this contemptuous statement, aimed at the working class among us.

"I see success approximately 50 percent of the time," said H.B. London, vice president for church and clergy at Focus on the Family, the conservative Christian ministry in Colorado Springs. "Guys just wear out and they can no longer subject themselves to the process."

Those who fail "end up selling cars or shoes or something, and being miserable and angry the rest of their lives," London said.

So, selling cars or shoes is beneath all you men of God, eh?

I almost feel sorry for Haggard. Almost. MKJ

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2006/11/08/AR2006110801703.html

[rodeodance]

1. I wonder if the law will stay away from him? (drugs). Anyone know?

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

4. This from a local news station...

The Denver Police Department says it is watching the situation unfold and planned to talk to both Haggard and Jones about the possible crimes that may have been committed in Denver.

MKJ

http://www.9news.com/acm_news.aspx?OSGNAME=KUSA&IKOBJECTID=b48a5894-0abe-421a-01b8-3e421c27782d&TEMPLATEID=0c76dce6-ac1f-02d8-0047-c589c01ca7bf

[Hubert Flottz]

37. GOOD!

Normal everyday people, get some serious jail time for dealing drugs. Famous Repubs get away with rehab.

[Roland99]

2. NBC today had some "conversion experts" on there to convert the gay.

:eyes:


NBC is really pushing the apologist crap today:


3 different people interviewed in-studio in support of the war.

Defending Haggard and trying to sell that homosexuality is a choice

Group selling t-shirts to support the troops. Takepride.com One of the shirts attempts to glorify the attack on Falluja.

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

5. My husband and I had a really off color, funny riff going about the "cure"

for gayness to which Haggard will be subjected.

We were trying to top each other with the possible treatments, getting more lascivious and outrageous with each scenario.

The worst part...we were probably either right on the money, or too tame in our speculation. MKJ

[flordehinojos]

3. does that give him a pass from purgatory?

}(

[xchrom]

6. since haggard's only goal is to convince others

of ''sincerity'' -- his ''authenticity'' -- in order to return to making a big paycheck and feed his ego -- this will be fine for him.

that's all that matters to him.

[Kingshakabobo]

8. Yep. Another "liar for Jesus." nt

[elehhhhna]

7. Better to sell cars and shoes than lies and bullshit.

Jesus actually said that but I can't find the chapter & verse numbers at the moment

[shirlden]

9. The guy has two problems

Number one, the drug thing, which is a legal question that only concerns the Denver police.
Number two, he cheated on his wife and that should be just between the two of them.

I thank Mr. Haggard, for maybe turning a couple of voters our way, but now it is time to say bye-bye and concentrate on something really important like the Britney DIVORCE.

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

11. Here's some substance that arises from this issue...

Haggard sex scandal raises questions about 'superstar' pastors
By Rachel Zoll, Associated Press
November 10, 2006


Pastor Ted's influence was felt everywhere in New Life Church: in the videos shown at worship; in the New Life bookstore, which stocked books he recommended; and in the story of the church itself. He started New Life in his basement, building it into a 14,000-member nationally known megachurch. As the Rev. Ted Haggard's fortunes rose, so did the church's.
So when Haggard fell spectacularly from grace in a scandal involving drugs and allegations of gay sex, many wondered if New Life, so tied to his public persona, would crash with him.



>snip
Nearly all megachurches are independent from a denomination — an asset for their flexibility, but a liability when it comes to checks on power. By contrast, mainline Protestant denominations vet clergy credentials and have elaborate systems of church tribunals, similar to civil courts, that discipline errant ministers.

"The pitfall with the megachurches, the personality driven churches, is it's so easy for a person to consider him- or herself above accountability," Martin said. "If that accountability is absent or reduced, then trouble is on the way."

http://www.rockymountainnews.com/drmn/nation/article/0,1299,DRMN_16_5134457,00.html

MKJ

[The Velveteen Ocelot]

22. Isn't a "personality-driven church" pretty damn close to a cult?

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

27. ocelot, you're just reading the truth between the lines. Stop that right now!

:applause: ! MKJ

[Skittles]

10. my car and shoe sales people sold me needed products

not f***ing delusions

[kstewart33]

12. I do feel sorry for him.

He will lose several years of his life trying to "fix" something that can't be fixed, and hating himself even more when he fails.

I don't understand these people. They are condemning gay men to a wasteful, exhausting test that can't be passed and that shouldn't be taken. And then they blame them even more.

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

16. I know what you're saying, and I did feel a twinge of sympathy for

him, when I read this article.

However, he made millions upon millions vilifying gays, while paying for gay sex on a routine basis.

He needs professional counseling to come to grips with who he is, not guilt and shame harangues for years.

I don't know, it's just a sad situation. MKJ

edited to add: but then, hypocrisy is often naturally comical, as well.
I've got to admit to some laughter about this. :-)

[katinmn]

13. Rep-elect Bachmann's hubby is a "conversion" expert

pretending to be a pyschologist. Bachmann belongs to a MN arm of Haggert's church. I imagine the Bachmann's are involved.
http://dumpbachmann.blogspot.com/

[Warren Stupidity]

14. followed by 3-5 days

of intense meth-fueled ass sex.

[peekaloo]

17. .

:rofl:

[Coexist]

15. "laying on of hands"?

these jokes just write themselves.

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

19. A further description of the laying hands approach...

"I'm sure there will be those who lay their hands on Pastor Haggard as an act of faith, calling on the act of God to restore and heal," he said. "The prayer can be therapeutic, the laying on of hands can be ceremonial."

Not to be cynical, but really, can't the poor guy just have some plain old psycological therapy sessions, which don't require physical contact by his buddies.

MKJ

[notadmblnd]

30. No, No... Honestly, I think an all out exorcisim is called for

laying on the hands is not going to work. There are Demons at work here that those fundy nuts just don't realize. If the lay their hands on them the wrong way, the demons could scatter and make them all choose to be gay and they wouldn't want that now, would they? :sarcasm:

[peekaloo]

18. Conversely if you're good at selling cars and shoes are you in line

for the all important position of selling Jesus?

:sarcasm:

[MrScorpio]

20. I'm sure that the laying on hands will do some purging

He's had those types of massages before

[TroglodyteScholar]

21. This artical doesn't give the full scope of what Ted's facing...

...I mean, it takes months and months of serious asspounding to rehabilitate someone as far gone as Haggard.

[baby_mouse]

23. Fundies.

They're like giant cockroaches sitting in your living-room with their feet on your coffee-table, drinking your beer.

[msongs]

24. asking jesus for forgiveness only takes a few seconds - why are the humans

demanding so much more than the bible?

Msongs
www.msongs.com/political-shirts.htm

[Hubert Flottz]

25. This man was trafficking in "The Hard Stuff" why is he not going to

jail?

[malaise]

28. I don't give a damn about these morons

My only interest in them is the fact that some sheeple deserted them because of their hypocrisy and the fact that their link to the Rethugs means that we'll continue to observe the infighting as they both crumble from double standards.

Anything that weakens this pretence of values is all good to me.

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

31. See reply #4...DPD is investigating, say they will question Haggard and Jones.

MKJ

[Cass]

26. Haggard needs real therapy not this hocus-pocus nonsense.

I doubt this restoration baloney is going to do much to address the real issues here.

As for the comments about selling shoes, these people think who the heck they are. They are forever trying to reinforce their imagined superiority over those of us who won't buy what they're selling.

[NC_Nurse]

29. "Re-Neducation"

Frontal lobotomy anyone?

"It's bliiiissss."

[greenman3610]

32. will that include waterboarding with electrodes on the genitals?

every time he has an "impure" thought...ZZZZZAAAPPPPPP

[JohnnyLib2]

33. Maybe he has another shot at glory--

When this nonsensical process FAILS and he gets some publicity for finally comes to terms with his sexuality. Speaking of his sexuality, the the
"laying on of hands" is what he bought from the dude in the first place.
What a tortured path this crew is on.

[Fuzz]

34. The test will be if the laying on of hands by the fellows gives him a chubby.

If it does, he fails, and back to square one. :D

[Fridays Child]

35. "...men who are clean themselves insert themselves in the life of the one who is struggling...."

:rofl:

[BleedingHeartPatriot]

36. Clean man (tab A) insert into struggling life man here (slot B)

I can't believe I missed this...:rofl: MKJ