A Thanksgiving Memory

[Faux pas]

A Thanksgiving Memory
(or why you shouldn't cook the turkey in a brown paper bag)

Back in the day when my Mom and I shared an apartment, we decided to have a small turkey day gathering. We invited my brother Rob, my boyfriend Tom and Mom's boyfriend Hank. Because we had to work the day before, Mom suggested that we cook the turkey like a friend of hers did every year, in a brown paper bag.

The plan, put the bird in the oven at midnight at 250 degrees, and tah dah, the bird would be done to perfection by noon the next day. Hey, I was game. I prepared and stuffed the bird and proudly slid it into the oven at midnight and went off to bed, confident that everything would be perfect the next day.

At 5am, I awoke to the wonderful aroma of of turkey wafting through the apartment. I went to the kitchen to check on it and almost fainted when I discovered the bird was all but done. Yikes! Now what? I turned the oven down to about 150 and hoped Mom would be up soon. As it was, she didn't get up until after 8. By 930am, I was calling everyone and telling them dinner was ready! Everyone was gathered by 1030am.

Luckily for me, someone had brought a few joints with them. It wasn't Hank as he didn't partake. I won't name names, but there are only two other choices. Anyway, three out of five of us proceeded to get loaded. Two out of five of us got a contact high. Mom suggested that Hank do a reading from the bible. That was the second mistake of the day. Hank started reading, I went to get the dinner ready for the table. And Hank continued to read, and one by one, Mom, Rob and Tom ended up in the kitchen with me.

What happened next was sinful. The four of us started a free-for-all eating frenzy that would have put Henry the 8th to shame. Nothing was left untouched. We ate out of pots and pans and bowls. And Hank read on. When we finally came out of our 'pot' induced haze, what was left to bring to the table looked pretty pitiful. We dug out smaller bowls, serving dishes and platters and loaded them up with our left overs. And Hank read on.

The four of us set up the table around Hank as he read on. Mom brought him out of his bible reading reverie by announcing that dinner was ready. He was delighted at the 'feast' that we had set before him. Hank wanted to say "Grace", (who knew how long that would go on?) we out voted him and let Rob do it. We all loaded our plates and just watched Hank eat. He never did
figure out why we weren't hungry.

LOL The moral of this story? If you want to cook your turkey in a brown paper bag, go ahead. Just don't put it in the oven the night before.

Happy Thanksgiving to you all!

[acmavm]

1. And a very very happy Thanksgiving to you. And let me thank you

for posting a warm and funny thread.

I'm way past sick and tired of the 'let's beat everybody up today because the Pilgrims were horrible killer thugs...' crap.

Again, thank you. This story made my day. Now I think on this not I'll go and work on my dinner.

[Faux pas]

2. You're very welcome. And thank you for the Thanksgiving

wishes. Hope your dinner is wonderful....you gonna use a brown paper bag? ;)

[acmavm]

3. Nope. But for the first time in years I really wish I had something

to smoke (if you get my drift).

[Faux pas]

4. LOL, sure do. I'd send you some if I could. Have a good one

in spite of your lack of herb.