To Live is to Fly In Search of Peace with Cindy Sheehan

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To Live is to Fly
In Search of Peace with Cindy Sheehan


Days up and down they come
Like rain on a conga drum
Forget most, remember some
Oh, but don't turn none away
Everything is not enough
Nothing is too much to bear
Where you've been is good and gone
All you keep is the getting there
Well, to live's to fly awe low and high
So shake the dust off of your wings
And the sleep out of your eyes
To Live is to Fly, Townes Van Zandt

To Live is to Fly was sung around our camp fire last night at Camp Casey, here in Crawford, Tx. About two dozen of us gathered from all around the country to support Hiram Myers and Em Hardy who are now on trial in Waco for “obstructing a roadway.” They and 14 other Camp Casey activists had been arrested last Easter, where Camp Casey One had been the previous summer. The activists set up tents on Good Friday in the ditches to challenge the so-called “Cindy Sheehan” orders. Ordinances that prohibit “camping, eating, or sleeping” in ditches near the president’s faux-ranch were enacted shortly after we pulled up stakes and left Crawford in summer of 2005. The group was arrested for breaking the county supervisor’s orders, which we think are clearly unconstitutional and were passed just to suppress our first amendment freedoms, but Hiram and Em were charged with a “bait and switch” class B misdemeanor. The group set up tents in the ditches, not in the roadway. The only thing that Camp Casey obstructs in Crawford is the lies and calumny that led to an illegal and immoral war and George’s free rein in being the worst president is US history.

After day one of the trial, we headed to Camp Casey to have a meal together around a camp fire. Our property in Crawford has been transformed from 5 acres of weeds and briars to a lovely, shady, florid 5 acres of love and peace. I almost didn’t come to Texas for the trial because I just got home from Korea and have to head out to attend many activities back east in a few days. However, I am so glad I decided to make the effort to come to Crawford. I always enjoy coming back to my property whenever I can, but this was a special visit for me. Camp Casey is my second home and after running around the world and feeling and hearing hatred directed at me (because I am the only one in the world who feels the war in wrong and George Bush should be held accountable) by some of the potential jurors in the case---a night at Camp Casey was just what the proverbial doctor ordered!

As we were sitting around the camp fire, reminiscing, telling funny stories, talking politics and current events; I realized, once again, that families do not have to be related by blood and I also was struck by what Camp Casey and the dedicated souls who travel the country working for peace and justice during the year, but who always manage to find our ways back to the improbable location of Crawford, Tx, have accomplished this past year.

We are not taking full credit for the revolution that occurred on Nov. 7th, but we know that August, ‘05 was one of the first and certainly most visible times, that the war was questioned and BushCo’s lies exposed. It’s the time when public opinion started turning against George and his war of inappropriate choice. We had a lot to celebrate around the fire last night, but we also were very conscious of the fact that we need, over and over again, to separate from each other, dust off our wings, and fly back out to real life where there is still so much work to do.

When the Townes Van Zandt song was being sung, I was touched by the words: “Nothing is too much to bear.” Not even a year and a half ago; I would have sorrowfully disputed that line. Right before I headed to Crawford, Texas, on August 6, 2005, I was still in so much pain from Casey’s death that I would often walk aimlessly around my home, just picking random objects up and putting them back down. I would be doing some menial task and suddenly become aware that tears were streaming unabated down my cheeks. The tears were almost as much a part of me as the autonomic nervous system function of breathing or digesting.

One thing I was always supremely conscious of, though, was my ever present rage against the Bush machine that killed Casey and frustration over the fact that the lies were being multiplied by more lies and with what seemed like the American public’s complicity in the deceit. The pain of Casey’s untimely and violent death, and the longing to hear his voice, kiss his soft cheeks, receive one of his bear hugs, or even just catch a quick glimpse of him one more time will never go away.

However, the Camp Casey phenomena of two summers ago and the continued gathering of my new family, the support of my blood family, and the reawakening of our nation have taken away the rage and frustration and replaced those feelings with hope and joy.

Just when I got to the point where I thought I couldn’t bear one more day without Casey or one more day of the intense feelings of fury, Camp Casey happened. I often get asked what would have happened if George had met with me on August 6th, 2005. I am not quite sure what would have happened politically or socially if he had had the courage or integrity to meet with me that now important day, but I don’t think that, personally, I would now be able to sit around a camp fire and laugh so unreservedly without guilt with everyone else. For this, I will always be immeasurably grateful.

Our nation, the countries of Iraq and Afghanistan and so many other peoples of the world have been through so much since BushCo dishonestly came into power almost six very long years ago, but we cannot look back with longing and regrets…those days are gone. We need to look forward to a very near future when the miscreants that have caused so much heart-pain are gone and we can start putting our world and our hearts back together again.

We just have to keep getting there.

In Search of Peace will be a series of articles by Cindy detailing and reflecting on her day to day travels, interactions, current events, and of the life of a nomadic peace activist. To Live is to Fly is the first installment.