From the bottom of my broken heart...

[King_Crimson]

I want to thank each and every one of you fine people for your condolensces, heartfelt sympathy, advice, and overall caring thoughts. You don't know the how much that all helps in this time of anguish, pain and despair that I feel over the loss of my wife Sandy...who I will still contend was sent to her grave by the murdering thugs governing the State of Indiana.

Tomorrow is going to be extremely difficult and trying for me as that is when we will lay my beloved to rest...all 80 pounds of her. Thats right... 80 POUNDS. Just a week before Thanksgiving when we found out about this parasite that had invaded her body, she weighed 139 pounds. This tells me that the tumour that had attacked her liver was a savage and mean beast. I wish someone could tell me why she was sent home only a day after surgery that was suppose to strangle and shrink this thing?? Had I known THEN...what I know NOW (and I don't believe I have all the facts), I wouldn't even have allowed them to perform surgery.

Anyhow...anger and pain is once again overtaking me, so I'm going to go away for awhile now. But I deeply appreciate everyones concerns at this time. When I return, perhaps we can discuss all the frustrations I have pent up inside me over this event. May God bless each and every one of you...and PLEASE...FOR GODS SAKE...TAKE CARE OF YOUR WELL BEING!

Ron


On edit...I wanted to include the lyrics to a beautiful song done by the Ozark Mountain Daredevils from their album "Men From Earth". This song held a special meaning for Sandy...and she loved it immensley:

Its How You Think
Words and Music by Larry Lee 1976


There are people livin'in poverty
Their lives are just misery
Can't get enough relief

There are children needing some food to eat
Shoes on their little feet
Lookin' to you and me
So...
(chorus)

Why do we look away
Think it will go away today
I think it's only fair
That we should all be asked to share

There are men among us who rule our land
And though they're just fools in bands
Hold us all in their hands

There are people preaching their gods to me
Saying that I can't see
Yet they give me books to read

(chorus)

They say more's wrong than right
Some say more dark than light
I say it's how you think
That makes you swim or sink

:cry:

[Ron Green]

1. Peace be with you. Take good care of yourself.

:hug:

[liberaldemocrat7]

77. I have this vision.

I have this vision where good people eventually go
billions of people that most people did not know
from the beginning of time to the end of this earth

Envision this when someone you love does go
saying hello to the person you love
listen to the crushing roar of hello and well done
even though your loved one doesn't live on earth anymore

Your loved one will never remain alone
billions of people who lived good lives
and now the person you love joins THEM

never forgotten never alone

HELLO AND WELL DONE!

[SammyWinstonJack]

2. ..

:hug:

[Coventina]

3. We will be with you in spirit tomorrow.

:hug:

Take care of yourself. Check in when you can.

[CrazyOrangeCat]

4. ...

:hug:

[dogday]

5. **

Peace, Love and Good Thoughts coming your way

[Monkeyman]

6. The Love from the DU is real and from the heart

You have my email use it we will stand as one

[wicket]

7. You are in my thoughts and prayers

I am so sorry :cry:

:hug:

[hlthe2b]

8. I'm so very sorry, King_Crimson... Through my tears

I am anquished to think there is nothing I can say or do to help. May you find peace in the happy memories of Sandy... And may the friends and family that surround you now shower you with compassion and comfort.

[Gman]

9. More prayers for your wife, you and your family

It sounds like it was an extremely aggressive cancer and probably very rare. Don't let your anger consume you and don't second guess yourself. You made the decision that was right at that point in time. To lose almost 60 pounds in three and a half months implies there was a whole lot more going on with her cancer than, I think, they wanted to tell you.

[AndyA]

10. I am so sorry to hear about your loss.

Few are the choices we are given; the sands of time pass quickly by.

Wishing you peace and strength during this difficult time.

[Kadie]

11. .

:hug:

[enigmatic]

12. Take care of yourself, my friend

More than any other time, this is the time to envelop yourself in the love that's surrounding you here and w/ your friends and family.

If you need anything at all, please PM me; all the good vibes I can send are on their way:)

[rubberducky]

13. May your soul find some peace.

Prayers and love to you.

[snappyturtle]

14. God Bless you. n/t

[MuseRider]

15. Oh my dear

I am so sorry to hear this. I did not see anything earlier.

You take care of yourself. I am sending thoughts of strength and peace to help you through this time.

:hug:

[Straight Shooter]

16. To send her home one day after surgery, with a dire prognosis, is unconscionable.

If they had given up on her, why not just prescribe her pills and send her home, to let her go to sleep gently, in her own bed, with you holding her in your arms as you lay beside her, and pass on that way, instead of the torment she went through.

Many will disagree with me, that modern medicine should do "all it can," but if modern medicine only goes half-way and leaves a person to suffer horribly for the rest of the way, that isn't fair. It's cruel beyond measure.

King Crimson, I know your heart is burning with rage, as well it should be. I am asking you, please, find a way to channel it so that it does not live within you and take on a parasitic life of its own and damage your health, too. Plant a tree for the love of your life and nurture it. Start seedlings of your wife's favorite perennial flowers, nurture them, plant them when they are ready. As the years pass, they will be a living memorial to the love you shared with her.

It sounds like a silly thing to do now, but please trust me on this, in time, it will help your heart to heal.

:hug:

[Raksha]

56. Good advice. I have found that planting seeds always helps.

God bless you, King Crimson.

[antigop]

17. King_Crimson, I'm sorry for your loss n/t

[fed-up]

18. I lost my mom 10 days after her diagnosis back in 1999 (lung)-just had a local

public defender pass away 2 weeks after his diagnosis of liver cancer

Cancer is an ugly, sometimes fast moving illness

rage is an understandable reaction, and a normal part of the grieving process

Time truely does heal all wounds


sending more hugs your way

{{{{{ {{{{{ {{{{{ hugs}}}}} }}}}} }}}}}

[wicket]

25. We lost my 10 year old cousin a year ago to an inoperable brain tumor

It's so damn unfair :( All of these peoples' lives extinguished much too early :cry:

[Loki]

19. My deep and heartfelt condolences

at the loss of your beautiful wife. Peace be with you.

Lee

[mmonk]

20. Take care at this time King_Crimson.

Keep Sandy close in your heart and may you have peace through your love and memories. I'll be thinking of you.

[JitterbugPerfume]

21. we will be thnking of you

and loving you in our heart

[Sapphire Blue]

22. (((((((King_Crimson)))))))

I've never heard of the song, 'Its How You Think'; thank you so much for sharing it with us. I can see why Sandy loved this song so much. What a beautiful & precious soul! You are so blessed to have shared 20 years with her, and I am so sorry that it had to end so soon and so painfully.

Please remember her beauty, her love, imprinted in your heart and in your soul.

Much love to you, my friend.

:hug: :grouphug: :hug:

[Booster]

23. I wish I had the words to comfort you, but I don't. Peace.

:cry:

[blm]

24. Peace and strength to you and your family.

.

[StaggerLee]

26. I wasn't able to respond yesterday

I wish you strength during this very difficult time.

My condolences to you, the family and friends.



Peace be upon her.

[GreenPartyVoter]

27. *hugs and prayers*

[pecwae]

28. Words never seem adequate....

I'm so very sorry for your loss and grief. Please visit us in DU Groups for bereavement and cancer support. Like all of DU we're here for you.

Blessings for some peace and comfort for your torn spirit.

[havocmom]

29. Anytime you need to vent, sob, lean on a shoulder or just ask for a hug

there are some very kind people at the ready in the Bereavement Group forum at DU.

Drop by when ever you need to share, sob or rant. You will find welcoming, concerned friends.

Strength to you.

hm

[DiehardLiberal]

30. I lost my husband to cancer...

just over 4 years ago. He was only 55. It was also very fast - just 3 months from the diagnosis that he passed. I was fortunate that I didn't have the anguish of bad hospital decisions with which you are now burdened. I still miss him every day, but do feel his presence and love - can't explain it. Just know that she loved you immensely and the last episode of pain is over. (I still beat myself up for letting a nurse turn Rob when he had a mattress that made it unnecessary, so I can only imagine your anger.) It was all beyond your control. I send love and the knowledge that you will get through this and continue to make her proud.

Hugs,
Rebecca

[connecticut yankee]

31. Again --

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

May you find peace during this troubled time, knowing that there are so many here on DU who send you their love and support.

[AliceWonderland]

32. Peace be with you, friend. Please try to take care of yourself. n/t

[Bunny]

33. Take care of yourself K_C. Come back to us when you're able.

:hug:

[Fovea]

34. Just remember

You have to be happy with what you have to be happy with, as Adrian Belew wrote.

May you find your inner moonchild.
Put on the headphones for a while, and let Robert, Adrian, Bill, and the rest burn the pain away.
I know a little indiscipline always helps me.

May You Be Blessed,
RealP

[JanusAscending]

35. Listen ............................

YOU ARE LOVED!!O8) :grouphug:

[roguevalley]

36. I hope you are surrounded by love, my friend, on these trying days.

Just know we care about you and will be here when you get back. I cannot in my heart and soul understand how she could have been let to go home so soon after surgery but at least she was with people who loved her so much. Take care, honey, and god bless you and yours.

[Raffi Ella]

37. I'm so glad to hear from you.

Thanks for checking in and letting us know about Sandys burial.We'll all be thinking of you and your beloved wife tomorrow.My love to you.

Take care.

[laruemtt]

38. as said above,

we will be with you tomorrow in spirit. may you take strength from knowing we care.

[The Straight Story]

39. Take care my friend, and check in if you need something

My phone is always on, my heart is always open, and my ears are always ready to listen.

[Irishonly]

40. Thoughts and Prayers are with you

I am so sorry. Cancer is such an insidious disease. May Sandy's memory warm your heart and I hope you can feel the love that is being given. May you have peace soon.:hug:

[Jacklyn75]

41. God Bless you! I'm so sorry for your loss and sorry that

Sandy didn't receive the help SHE DESERVED! My heart is broken for you!

[AzDar]

42. Be good to yourself during this trying time, KC. All the best to you!

[CTyankee]

43. A community called DU grieves with you. I know you will do right by her

and seek justice so that it doesn't happen to others.

You are a dear husband to your wife. May love heal you in the days ahead...

[Pharaoh]

44. Damn!

:cry: :cry: :cry:

[judaspriestess]

45. my deepest condolences

I cannot fathom the loss of a spouse

[Suziq]

46. . . .

:hug:

My deepest condolences.

[ceile]

47. ......

:cry:

:grouphug:

[Dinger]

48. I remember That The Ozark Mountain Daredevils Came To My Litttle Town Once

Eland, Wi., pop. 266. We had a street dance in the summer, pouring rain, mud up to our ankles. It was quite an investment for our little town. However, 6,000 people came, and it was truly a night to remember! The OMD came to the local pub and partied all night, while I tended bar!

Not that that helps lessen your grief, but the mention of the Ozark mountain Daredevils brought back a sweet memory for me.
:grouphug:

[King_Crimson]

49. They have a nice website...

go to www.ozarkdaredevils.com You can order the aforementioned cd there at a reasonable price.

[King_Crimson]

50. Here's "COMPASSIONATE CONSERVATISM" for you...

Further Medicaid Cuts Suggested

Medicaid spending in Indiana has recently grown by more than 10 percent a year. Daniels said he would slow growth to about 5 percent through a variety of program changes affecting eligibility, benefit levels, and provider payments.

Kruse said the governor should go farther with Medicaid spending cuts.

"If we have no growth in Medicaid, we could balance the budget on that," Kruse said. "It's the second-largest expenditure in the state next to education. If we keep it from growing, the budget is balanced."

[salin]

55. and when they say this it is never mentioned how much *more* the state

has to pay for a) unfunded federal mandates (such as NCLB) - and tax cuts leading to cuts in $ sent to states for programs such as medicaid.

I am so very sorry for your loss. My heartfelt condolences. In time, may the many warm memories shift from painful (greiving) to comforting.

Back to Mitch - let your voice be heard - I am certain there are many, many others whose lives have met with tragic circumstances as a result of the endless cutting in order to (at the fed level) give huge tax cuts to the wealthy and to corporations while funding a war without asking how to pay for it (and we DO pay for it - esp at the state level and in essential services). This hoosier stands in solidarity with you in your outrage.

[bobbolink]

51. I already miss Sandy, too.

:cry:

That song you posted, saying it was her favorite, said all I need to know about her--what a good heart!

The world is poorer for her passing. :cry:

Please be careful to take very good care of yourself, too. We still need you!!

:grouphug: :loveya:

[HCE SuiGeneris]

52. May your heart heal and may your fond memories remain crystal clear.

Be well.

[SmokingJacket]

53. I'm so, so sorry...

It sounds like you gave her so much love, and she gave it back to you. I hope that sustains you...

:hug:

[Raster]

54. I had five hearts to give. You have them all. Bless your heart.

:cry:

[live love laugh]

57. Know that many understand your heartbreak. I wish you strength. n/t

[likesmountains 52]

58. I too am so sorry..such a sad story...

[tnlefty]

59. I'll be thinking of you.

I've been through a couple of difficult funerals, but not one of my spouse. Take care of yourself.

[SeattleGirl]

60. Take care of yourself, King

And let others take care of and support you in this terribly sad time.

We will be here for you when you are ready to come back.

:grouphug:

[lonestarnot]

61. Our thoughts are with you K_C.

It's more than ok to be angry. Hang tough.

[faithnotgreed]

62. much peace and love to you ron

that is a beautiful song and unfortunately apt tribute to your beloved wife

it is painfully bizarre how times really DONT change
whether its woodie guthrie or the song you posted or bob dylan or bruce springsteen or gil-scott heron etc etc there is always too much pain in the world especially for those who can least take it

we are all in this together and we are so glad you are sharing your pain with us

all our love and prayers with you as you seek answers and healing

[colorado_ufo]

63. Please accept my sympathy and condolences,

and thank you for your blessing. It is, remarkably, just what I needed. I have been indeed neglecting myself - trying to cram too much into a day - and need to rearrange my life and do a little more self-care.

You just gave me the motivation, and I thank you.

Blessings on you, too.

[MODemocrat]

64. My heart is aching for you King_Crimson

Such a loss for you; and may God give you strength.:grouphug: :cry: :cry: :cry: :hug:

[sueh]

65. Keeping you in my prayers, KC

and Sandy, too, God bless her soul.

[sueh]

66. Keeping you in my prayers, KC

and Sandy, too, God bless her soul.

[LynzM]

67. Peace to you, King Crimson

I feel like it's almost unfair to even wish that to you, when you are hurting so much. But I hope that you can find some answers and some very supportive friends and family to help you right now. We'll be here for you when you're ready to come back. :hug:

[ninkasi]

68. You have my deepest sympathy

I am outraged at the system that consigned you and your beloved wife to so much pain. Take care. Many, many loving thoughts and prayers are going your way. You have lost half of your soul, and it will take time to heal. I wish you only the best during this most difficult time. :cry: :cry: :cry:

[calimary]

69. I'm so sorry... SO sorry...

My deepest, most heartfelt condolences. I'm so sorry. Your heart may be breaking, but it isn't doing so alone. Seems as though there is a multitude of hearts here at DU that are breaking for you, too.

You're in my thoughts. You're in our thoughts.

Something you need to realize, though: She IS aware of this. Her spirit is probably there directly beside you, perhaps putting her arms around you. The way you express your feelings for her, your love, your grief - hell, ANY wife would find her soul flying and gliding and floating and dancing, thinking that her man back on this side was speaking and feeling that way about her. Please know that you are surely warming her glorified heart. She knows even more clearly and expansively now how greatly you love her. You're embroidering her legacy and memory with GREAT love.

[Skittles]

70. I am so sorry King Crimsom

deeply sorry

On soft gray mornings widows cry
The wise men share a joke;
I run to grasp divining signs
To satisfy the hoax.
The yellow jester does not play
But gentle pulls the strings
And smiles as the puppets dance
In the court of the crimson king.

[Truthiness Inspector]

71. May she rest in peace

And I'm sorry I was harsh the other night. She was your soulmate. You two will meet again, but timing sure doesn't ever work on our schedules.

Take care.

[fortyfeetunder]

72. Again my deepest sympathy

:hug: :hug:

[Broken_Hero]

73. ........

:hug:

[nicknameless]

74. .

I am so very sorry for what you and your wife were put through and for your devastating loss.

Peace and healing to you

:grouphug:

[Behind the Aegis]

75. Condolences.

Save these threads. Take "screen shots" of them. When you get down, you can pull them up and see that there were many here that expressed their sorrow, love, and compassion in your time of need. Sometimes, when we are in pain, we need to know that others try to share the burden with us. The saying is "time heals all wounds." Personally, I have found it is not the passage of time that heals us, but rather the love others share with us when we need it most.

:hug:

[DemReadingDU]

76. I am so sorry for the loss of your wife

It is always so very sad to lose someone so close to us. May loving memories of your wife comfort you. Keeping you and your family in my thoughts during this sad and difficult time.

[jackster]

78. we are with you and yours today

holding you in arms of love and peace

godspeed Sandy

[qanda]

79. My thoughts are with you today

I can't even imagine the hurt and pain you're experiencing right now. Today will be tough, but I hope you will allow the good memories you've had with your wife to flood your soul and take away the bitter feelings from how she died. I am praying for you.

[Autonomy]

80. Thank you for thinking of others

in this, your time of mourning.

May God bless each and every one of you...and PLEASE...FOR GODS SAKE...TAKE CARE OF YOUR WELL BEING!

Ron

I am certain it bodes well for your recovery from this grief and your own spiritual journey that you are concerned with others' well being right now.