Attitudes toward corporal punishment

[lumberjack_jeff]

The "Abuse" thread responses seem to imply gender differences in attitudes toward corporal punishment.

For the purposes of this poll, "corporal punishment" is a bare-handed slap on the backside of one's own child who is under 10 years old. "Abuse" is inappropriate misuse of parental authority with long term physical or psychological harm.

[aikoaiko]

1. Context and details are pretty important in these sorts of decisions for me.

But I chose the first chose.

[lumberjack_jeff]

2. If the definition I've provided is inadequate...

... I'd appreciate a suggested alternate.

My first reaction is that if a person feels the context makes the difference then the answer is probably that the person doesn't consider it inherently abusive.

[aikoaiko]

15. Yes, you are correct, I do not think normal spanking is inherently abusive.

But it could be, for example, if it were done for very minor infractions or things that I wouldn't consider an infraction at all.

[gollygee]

3. I think you should probably define "abuse"

Do you mean abuse to the point where someone's child should be taken away? I think it's abusive as in wrong and a misuse of parental and physical power, but I don't think it should meet the legal definition of abuse because I don't think it's in the best interest of children to be taken out of their homes for that reason.

[lumberjack_jeff]

4. A good suggestion. n/t

[YOY]

5. A slap on a child's butt and beating a prisoner are two seperate things but both corporal punishment

I don't have an issue with one (as a parent and in only sparing doses) but with the other I won't tolerate.

[lumberjack_jeff]

6. For the purposes of this discussion, a definition is provided. n/t

[TahitiNut]

7. People aren't for hitting.

:shrug:

[redqueen]

17. ...

:loveya:

[TahitiNut]

22. !

:loveya: backatcha!

It seems like it should be obvious that people are for hugging, not hitting.

[treestar]

8. Can't say

I don't know that I'd call what you described "abuse." I don't think I could call it that.

OTOH, I think there are better ways. I've seen people use them.

[seabeyond]

9. because i don't think it is abuse, doesnt mean i think it is effective and good parenting

either. i dont think spanking is inherently abusive though it can easily be. i also dont think it is effective adn i dont use it as a parenting tool, nor have i needed it and i dont think it works.

[AlCzervik]

10. what exactly does the child get out of being spanked?

yes i am a parent, seems to me the only thing that it confirms is that the parent has lost control. flame away.

[H2O Man]

11. Other n/t

[lumberjack_jeff]

12. Probably prudent. The poll is hacked. n/t

Nevermind.

[seabeyond]

19. or the majority do not think it is abuse. n/t

[lumberjack_jeff]

24. It isn't the outcome which leads me to suggest it. n/t

[seabeyond]

25. ssshhhh, is it a secret? n/t

[DCKit]

13. I hear one little bastard threatening his Mom with a call to social services once....

So I explained to him what happens to kids in the foster system. Not TOO graphically, of course, but his eyes got REAL big.

[RaleighNCDUer]

14. The first spanking I remember was when I was about 5, and I

was caught playing with matches -- actually, I was trying to start a fire outside a neighbor's house. It it had caught it could have burned down the house - an old wood-frame place. I have no idea if the house was occupied, or if I even knew who lived there.

I got a swat on the butt every three steps for a block, all the way home.

And I still played with matches, afterward.

I grew out of my pyromania a few years later without having caused any real damage - but I did successfully hide it through all that time.

Is there a lesson there?

[aikoaiko]

16. This thread is not turning into the flamefest like so many other similar threads

dang it.

[DemGa]

18. I'd say abusive

Certainly lazy and mentally unrefined, a breach of trust. Sounds like a conservative family value.

[Blue_In_AK]

20. I very occasionally swatted my kids' behinds

when they were small, but never very hard or more than one swat, and only to get their attention -- i.e., like when they started to run into the street or something immediately dangerous. I don't think that's abuse, but all-out serious spanking I think is.

[Labors of Hercules]

21. only in extreme cases of willfully defiant behavior..

that puts or could potentially put a child at risk.

[Joe Fields]

23. Nothing wrong with it.

I have noticed though, that many people here on DU cannot, or refuse to determine a distinction between swatting and real physical abuse.