Chuck Norris sues, says his tears no cancer cure

[Kadie]

Chuck Norris sues, says his tears no cancer cure
By Christine Kearney
35 minutes ago


NEW YORK (Reuters) - Tough-guy actor and martial arts expert Chuck Norris sued publisher Penguin on Friday over a book he claims unfairly exploits his famous name, based on a satirical Internet list of "mythical facts" about him.

Penguin published "The Truth About Chuck Norris: 400 facts about the World's Greatest Human" in November. Author Ian Spector and two Web sites he runs to promote the book, including www.truthaboutchuck.com, are also named in the suit.

The book capitalizes on "mythical facts" that have been circulating on the Internet since 2005 that poke fun at Norris' tough-guy image and super-human abilities, the suit said.

It includes such humorous "facts" as "Chuck Norris's tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried" and "Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits," the suit said, as well as "Chuck Norris can charge a cell phone by rubbing it against his beard."

"Some of the 'facts' in the book are racist, lewd or portray Mr. Norris as engaged in illegal activities," the lawsuit alleges.

snip...
Norris, whose real name is Carlos Ray Norris, claims in the suit he is protective of what his name is associated with. He has recently made U.S. headlines for backing Republican presidential candidate former Arkansas Gov. Mike Huckabee.

more...
http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20071222/people_nm/norris_lawsuit_dc_1



U.S. Republican presidential candidate and former Arkansas Governor Mike Huckabee speaks to supporters during a campaign stop in Coralville, Iowa December 21, 2007.
REUTERS/Jim Young (UNITED STATES)

[MrScorpio]

1. The publisher should have cut a deal with Norris ahead of time

Would have saved a lot of cash and trouble that way

[customerserviceguy]

9. Nope, wrong

Chuckie-boy's lawsuit guarantees publicity for the book. There's enough money to be made to pay off Chuckie's lawyer, and still make a tidy profit besides. Now if Norris had ignored him, that's the path to financial ruin...

[Kurovski]

2. Just dim enough to be confused by satire,

and unlucky enough to have found a lawyer more than happy to keep him in the dark.

[MannyGoldstein]

3. This Suit Will Sell A Lot Of Books

But I don't think Chuckie will win - parody is allowable.

[fenriswolf]

4. chuck norris is so strong

he can pick up a cow, shake em up and make vanilla ice cream come out. to bad real men dont eat ice cream.

[LiberalFighter]

10. Wouldn't he make milk popsicles by blowing on the teats?

[Ecumenist]

5. Okay, isn't it a book about M-Y-T-H-I-C-A-L F-A-C-T-S??!!

Does this "little" man have so little to do with his life that he has to sue a book that OPENLY AND OVERTLY states that it is a "TONGUE IN CHEEK"??!!

And this is the man who huckabee believes adds gravitas to his campaign??
:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[Sarah Ibarruri]

6. I've never understood why Chuck Norris is popular with men.

He sure isn't popular with me! He's an ass.

[Beetwasher]

7. Ok, I'll Give Him The Tears, But I Know For A FACT It's True That

He's the only living mortal who never has to turn left...ever...and STILL ALWAYS gets where he needs to be.

[Vanje]

8. The mere smell of Chuck Norris' feet repels wolves!

[TheMadMonk]

13. You wouln't be a couple of digits short in your sig would you? nt

[Vanje]

14. Oh for Petes sake!

You're the first to have noticed. Been like that for months!
Lotta good that'll do.

Whats the difference.
I've been emailing, sending cards and letters, calling once a week or so, ever since Pelosi took impeachment off the table.
Hasn't done any good at all, even with the correct telephone number on my speed-dial.

Contacting Senators and Reps has been an apparent waste of time.

Here are some numbers that'll work if you want to call your Senators and Reps to tell them to fuck themselves. It will also be a waste of time, but may be somewhat satisfying.
202 225-3121
1 (800) 828 - 0498
1 (800) 614 - 2803
1 (866) 340 - 9281
1 (866) 338 - 1015
1 (877) 851 - 6437

[lame54]

11. C'MON GUYS - CHUCK NORRIS CAN DO ANYTHING...

except act

[acmavm]

12. Isn't that the image he's tried to hard to maintain? Doesn't he think he's

Superman, Batman, and Billy Jack rolled into one?

He needs to suck it up because no matter who the real Chuckie Norris is or what he can do, he's still one of the most annoying people on Earth.