GOP to Counter Dem Convention With New Strategy: It's the Obama, StupidBy R J Shulman
(Satire)WASHINGTON – As the Democratic Party Convention opens today in Denver, the Republicans are countering with a new campaign strategy to neutralize any momentum Barack Obama might try and generate from the Colorado festivities. The Post Times Sun Dispatch has obtained a copy of the memo which sets forth the new Republican strategy.
As you all know, the last time the Democrats won the White House it was due in large part to the clever Clinton people coming up with the slogan, "It’s the economy, stupid." We won the White House back with "It's the stupid, stupid," the idea Americans wanted a cuddly but dumb President, a guy just as moronic as the guy you would sit and have a beer with. McCain is just not that cuddly. As a matter of fact, the less the American people know about the flip-flopping, war mongering, anger driven, over the hill McCain, the better. So in order to get this race close enough to steal, we have to make this campaign about how bad Obama is and that McCain is not Obama. Hence the slogan – "It's the Obama, stupid."
Here's our plan:
1. We must try and convince the American people that Obama is a Muslim with a bad Christian preacher – I don't have to tell how hard it will be to overcome that kind of logic, but Fox News has us halfway there.
2. Convince those angry white females that Obama stole it from Hillary and that she still has a chance – again, this keeps the focus off McCain.
3. Keep hinting to America that Obama is an angry black man, without direct reference to race – use words like -- "uppity" or "those people" as in "95% of those people will vote for him because he's their kind, kind of candidate, that is."
4. Portray Obama, the guy who grew up in poverty and worked his way through Harvard as the elitist, and not McCain, the guy who owns untold houses and who married a beer heiress. Again should be impossible, but Fox has us halfway there.
5. Convince the Americans that Obama is the flip-flopper, even though it’s been McCain who's flopped more than a beached school of fish.
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