A Young Relative of Mine Was Molested and I Am Mad At McCain.

[demgurl]

I was watching Rachel last night when a segment came on showing the newest McCain commercial. This commercial alleges that Obama tried to pass a bill educating children, in kindergarten, about sex.

There are several things wrong with this. Obama never had his name attached to that bill. And even if he did, it was about educating our children about sexual predators, NOT sex.

A few weeks ago I found out that someone in my family is a sexual predator. At the same time, I found out that someone in our family (a child) had been molested by this person. The parents found out about the molestation when they took their children to an educational program much like the one that was in the bill that failed to pass. After they attended the program their child said not all touching and such was bad because XXXXXX had touched the child and XXXXXX was not a bad person.

This predator could have gone on to take advantage of my children or other people's children (another one was kissed but that is all I know about) if the family had not taken their children to a program to educate them on good/bad touch and what to do. I thank my lucky stars that my children were not hurt but someone in my family was and perhaps if this education existed in schools it never would have happened.

How dare they take such a sensitive subject and one that could help prevent children and families from being hurt and turn it into something tawdry!!! How dare they insult people who have had their children's lives ruined when such actions may have been prevented. I am upset and offended. Our children were not even touched and I cried for almost a week over the situation realizing we had dodged a bullet but others in our family had not.

I hope karma takes care of these people. I do not see how anyone can get behind the values of sticking your head in the sand and doing nothing to protect your children.

You do not know fear until you sit down your 8 & 9 year old and begin asking them if they have ever been touched. Every second of silence feels like an eternity and you wonder why you did not do more to make sure nothing like this ever happens. And there is nothing like the relief when you hear that your children are still intact.

Even without Obama's name attached, a bill like this should pass for the whole nation.

SHAME ON YOU FOR SPREADING LIES, JOHN McCAIN.

[MountainLaurel]

1. I agree completely

And I'm so sorry to hear about your little family member.

[demgurl]

11. Thank you for your kind words, MountainLaurel.

I really appreciate it.

[ogneopasno]

2. You're absolutely right.

I am so angry about this too. They will politicize everything. It's sick. You and your family are in my thoughts as you work through what happened.

[demgurl]

8. ogneopasno, thank for your kind thoughts.

Someone has to stop these people. I hope it is Obama.

[Runcible Spoon]

3. I'm so sorry your family has gone through such pain. you bring up an excellent point.

If kids aren't educated about sex, they are not equipped to know what is appropriate and what isn't. Especially since molestors can be so manipulative, and often slowly coerce children into those acts by "teaching them". :puke: It IS SO IMPORTANT that kids know about "good touch/bad touch" and about how that kind of touching is something special for grown-ups.

Do people REALLY want their kids to get their first "education" from a fucking sick molestor!? :grr: :mad:

[ogneopasno]

4. Your last line is excellent.

nt

[demgurl]

10. Yes, molesters groom their victims.

Most of the time the victims just go along. I am happy to say that my young family member stopped the older family member after two times of doing having something done to him. The older family member begged, pleaded and offered money but the young family member resisted and said no. I wish 'no' had been said all along but things could have been worse and much more prolonged. If this program had been taught in kindergarten my family may not be put through all of this right now.

I now have a perfect social study of the ways extended family deals with abuse. I do not wish that bit of denial on anyone either!

But I digress. The topic is this vile ad that McCain is running. I believe after dinner I will sit down and write an LTTE. This kind of action must be stopped. And, yes, kids do need to know about bad touch versus good touch.

[barbtries]

5. a friend's 13-year-old daughter

is in a mental hospital. they don't know the diagnosis. may be bipolar, may be schizophrenic, may be mpd. may be ptsd. it's her 3rd hospitalization in less than a year. last summer she visited her father's family in another state and ran into the person who had raped her when she was 5 or 6 years old (the person was only 11 at the time of the crime). her parents never knew. she never told anyone until she'd been hospitalized the first time.

we don't know if she is ever going to be all right.

it is so low for the mccain campaign to play to people's sexual repression - i haven't seen the damn commercial but it sounds like the unspoken part is that obama is some kind of pervert. it's the goddamn republicans with their pathetic disgusting and dishonest rovian tactics that are perverts.

[demgurl]

9. I am very sorry about your friend's daughter.

What an awful thing to go through. I was raped a long time ago but at least I was an adult and as such could work through it in a mature manner. I can not imagine such an act happening to a child. I hope your friend's daughter gets all the help she needs to heal as much as possible. I hope the criminal gets convicted for what he did. I understand it is a sickness that can never be cured. The best we can do is to try and prevent it but these creeps will have none of that. If they don't like it they can keep their kids home that day.


If you would like to see the ad, here it is:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2008/09/09/mccain-ad-obamas-lone-edu_n_125205.html

[unblock]

6. that was indeed one of the vilest political ads ever

basically trying to accuse the opponent of being a pervert.
what got me was the pictures they chose to put next to the words about wanting your kids to learn about sex.

completely beyond the pale.

if political campaigns had referees and penalties, mclame would have a one-month no-ad suspension.

[demgurl]

14. I agree. It was vile, tawdry and disgusting.

And I hated the last picture they showed of Obama looking down, almost as if leering inappropriately at a child. I thought I was imagining that until Rachel mentioned it as well.

I wish there were referees.

[unblock]

18. that's the image i was thinking of, as the worst of the bunch

you know that was completely deliberate, they took an image of him that i'm sure had him looking totally normal, probably fondly toward michelle or something, and crafted an image of their choosing that had NOTHING to do with him or that picture.

why do they even bother with the pretense, why not just paste his head on the body of an ax murderer or something.

come to think of it, that would be an improvement over this ad!

[demgurl]

20. I think you are right....

let's just get this whole thing over with and let them just come right out with all of their filthy accusations. My goodness, Obama was not even connected with that bill! How much lower can they stoop? Maybe I should take that back because whenever I think such a thing inevitably they stoop even lower!

Family values? The party of Manson family values is more like it. Not a moral among any of them!!!!

[mrreowwr_kittty]

7. Repukes always attack child predator prevention programs

Maybe this is why: http://www.republicansexoffenders.com/

[deaniac21]

12. The parents need to educate their children about predators

early and often, too. I sure have!

[demgurl]

15. I agree with your statement.

I also think, as a parent, that it sometimes helps to have a professional help you in educating your child. I can talk to my children all I want but perhaps I might miss something that the professional would not. I also think there are parents out there who may not be comfortable with talking to their children about this. Anything we can do to protect the innocent should be done.

At any rate, the original point of the post is McCain's smear tactics and how the ad is just a bunch of lies to make McCain look bad. Rachel mentioned it had been used against Obama before and back then it had been disproven but McCain just keeps on spreading lies.

[deaniac21]

21. Republicans lie, Democrats don't. It's a fact of life.

[renate]

13. how awful for your little relative... it makes me sick to my stomach just to read this

The world must have seemed to have stopped turning for the little boy's parents... how horrible to hear a bombshell like that out of the blue.

:hug: to you and your family (all except for the predator, of course--I'd like to :puke: all over him/her).

(On edit: I just realized that I got your post mixed up with someone else's and you never specified whether the family member who abused your relative was male or female.)

[demgurl]

16. I kept the sex of the child, and the name, secret on purpose.

I wanted to protect the identity of all involved. The child's parents would not appreciate their name getting out and being judged. For now they have decided not to press charges - the molester is not yet an adult and the family is very much into avoiding conflict. They had no idea, at the time, that the other family member has gone on to make advances at others. The person is stunted emotionally and actually acts as if nothing has happened at all. The mother got help for the molester but then stopped after a month! Not to excuse the molester but we found out a babysitter molested the person (over and over) about ten years ago. Now the molested has started the cycle again. Luckily it was a short cycle for the child in our family who was effected.

Sorry for spilling this all out. It happened last year. The parents found out in January. We found out about two weeks ago and so it is still fresh for me and mine. Not a single person in the family told us about it so we could protect our children. (the molester kept going to family gatherings but that has now been stopped since we stepped up and caused a ruckus) The mother of the molester was told to tell us but no follow-up happened and so we were not told. We have made it clear we will not go to any gatherings the molester attends. When we spoke up, the child's family spoke up and echoed what we said.

Thanks for the hugs and let's do all we can to make sure these liars never make it to office.

[MountainLaurel]

17. Kudos on your bravery

A friend of mine was part of the 3rd generation of women in her family to be raped by a particular family member. No one ever talked about it,

[LynneSin]

19. I think the law was a great idea - what if the molester is a parent?

I know someone that happened to - the 5 year old was being molested by her dad. If it wasn't for the grandmother this would have never been reported (or discovered by the mother).

I think it's very important to teach young children even BEFORE they learn to read what is "Good Touch" and "Bad Touch". Thing is you don't even have to teach about sex to teach children right from wrong with this stuff.