Carl Hiaasen's election prayer: "Deliver us from scandal, Lord"

[madfloridian]

I love Carl Hiaasen. He has a way with words, words that dig deep into the issues, tongue in cheek words.

Deliver us from scandal, Lord

An Election Day prayer for the Sunshine State:

Dear Lord, have mercy on Florida. Please don't let it happen again here.

Not that we're blaming You for the voting debacle back in 2000. You're not the one who designed the ridiculous butterfly ballots that started the whole mess. It wasn't You who put Katherine Harris in charge, and it certainly wasn't You who caused all those silly chads to hang.

And don't worry -- we know You're not the one who stopped the recount and handed the presidency to You-know-who. That was the Supreme Court.

The rest, as they say, is history. Not that You need reminding, but the last eight years in this country have been basically a train wreck. Iraq, Katrina, the economic crash -- we're not whining, Lord, but our nerves are shot.

Be sure to read his Red God Blue God section.

Red God, Blue God

Yet the guilt lingers, and there's no sense denying it. The throngs that lined up to vote early went there to prove something. We can never erase the dismal consequences of Bush-Gore, but we've got a chance to help make history without mucking it up.

Despite what the crazy TV preachers say, we don't really know whether You're a red God or blue God, Republican or Democrat or independent. All we want is an even break.

So please remember Florida in your blessings on Tuesday.

Thanks to Carl Hiaasen for this request to God. Well said.

[madfloridian]

1. Forgot this great part:

"But if, in Your infinite wisdom, You see a need to test the faith of this great country with another electoral crisis, please consider doing it in Virginia or Ohio, or maybe North Carolina.

God, anywhere but here. Amen."

[BrklynLiberal]

2. "God, anywhere but here. Amen" -- ROTFLMAO

[ocean girl]

3. As a resident of Palm Beach County

I say - OH YES!!! Anywhere but here!

[madfloridian]

4. I can just imagine you really mean that!

:D

[madfloridian]

5. Kick for Carl Hiaasen and his prayers.

:)